"How can you trust her to be here by herself all day, while you are out working in the fields?"
"I trust my wife," the farmer said. "She's never been unfaithful."
"I'll make you a little bet. If I take your wife upstairs, she'll be unfaithful. If not, you can have my plane. If she is unfaithful, I get your fiddle."
"It's a deal." So, the pilot and the farmer's wife go upstairs. About a half hour passes, and the farmer picks up the fiddle and starts playing it.
"Be true to me, be true to me, be true for just one hour. Be true to me, be true to me, and this airplane will be ours."
Another fifteen minutes pass, and suddenly he sees his wife coming down the stairs. He asks her if she was faithful to him. She walked over, picked up the fiddled, and started playing it.
"He kissed me on the lips. He kissed me on the tits. He kissed me in the middle. He kissed a spot you forgot, and you lost your f*cking fiddle."