The Reverends Rant
Get The Fuck Out Of My Way
I don't care how close you are to your fucking turn, GO THE FUCKING POSTED SPEED! If you are in front of me, fucking go! The left lane is the passing lane, dammit! If you want me off your your ass, SPEED UP OR GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY! Another thing too - DON'T BLOCK THE FUCKING INTERSECTION! Or entrance or exit or driveway or side street or ANY FUCKING ROADWAY! Everybody in this town had best be happy that The Reverend does not have his Skull Wagon anymore. I have a list of persons who can tell you some stories about that car. Put it this way... if you were in my way or blocking my progress in any way whatsoever, I would just plow right into your sorry ass. With a great big solid steel fully loaded custom station wagon with a 302 engine and a deer skull with antlers firmly wired to the front grill. Whomp it and stomp it, baby! Bet you move then, motherfucker. These people in Vegas DO NOT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE!
Listening (NOT)
When somebody says "As Is", what exactly does that mean? Apparently, it means "Here is a list of things I want done before I buy". Hello? Excuse me..... AS IS! That means AS IS, dammit. It doesn't mean ANYTHING else. "For Sale As Is". "OK, I'll buy it if you put in new windows, a new roof, new doors, new carpet and paint." Hey, if I did all that, I WOULD FUCKING KEEP THE PLACE! As Is, take it or leave it. If you don't want it, move out of the way, because somebody else does. I am not going to argue with you about it, it is for sale exactly like it is, period. If you want it, great, lets do business. If not, stop wasting my time and yours and start looking for something somewhere else.
Eroding Freedoms
Now, thanks to some fucking asshole, I can't even take TOOTHPASTE IN MY LUGGAGE TO GET ON A PLANE! No deodorant, cologne, mouthwash, nothing. Now, you have to buy everything AGAIN after you get to wherever you are traveling by plane. You already HAVE all of this stuff, because you USE IT EVERY DAY. You can't even have a bottle of fucking water for crying out loud. I am an airplane traveling motherfucker and this bullshit pisses me off to no end. They already basically strip search you in the terminal, so I don't wear any jewelery. They make you take your shoes off, so I don't wear my boot chains. You have to empty your pockets, so I can't carry my pocketknives (which pisses me off TREMENDOUSLY). No metal is allowed anymore, so I can't use my moneyclip. They scrutinize everything so fucking closely, I don't take my pocketwatch with me. Since I have long hair and tattoos (which fits the "profile" of a terrorist perfectly, by the way), I have to take my belt off to get on the plane. You know, the belt that HOLDS MY PANTS UP. If they checked everybody else as closely as they check me, THE TRADE TOWERS WOULD STILL BE STANDING!
Stress
I am fucking moving to Las Vegas Nevada next week (September 1st, 2006) and I am under so much stress that it is almost unreal. Those of you who know me know that I have a million things going on all the time. Why on Earth would someone want to just ride my fucking ass constantly over bullshit? Every fucking day. Every fucking night. There is ALWAYS something to complain, whine or bitch about. Maybe it is a positive thing somehow, but dammit, give it a break. I can't even answer the fucking phone without it turning into an episode. Why would someone want to be a pain in the ass, or why would someone call me when they are just going to start in on me as soon as I answer? Literally, AS SOON AS I PICK UP THE PHONE. Give it a fucking break. I am moving to Vegas, I have a million people calling me and emailing me every day, I go all over the place with all sorts of people, I have lots of friends who want to get up and hang out and that is just the way it is. If you can't handle it, that is your problem - don't make it mine. Stress can kill a person. So can a well placed choke hold.....
"You Pick" Rockstars
Who the fuck is in charge of the choices you have to pick from? Has anybody seen the new "Supernova" garbage? I can not believe these people are actually in the running to be in a band with Tommy Lee, Jason Newstead & Gilby Clarke! First off, they all suck. The show is so fake, I hope that the producers don't think we believe this shit. These off the cuff comments are so lame.... the performances are even worse. "I ain't never been on an airplane before, so it was exciting". Yeah, pick her. Or, pick the queer who didn't even know the words to the song HE PICKED. "They say I use my body in a sensual way". No shit, princess. That is because YOU ARE A CHICK AND AS A SINGER, YOU SUCK. I ain't buying this album when it comes out, no matter who "wins". All these fuckers suck. That's right. I said all of them. Another thing, there ain't no votes that determine the "winner", the band chooses who they want. All this shit is predetermined. Just in case he reads this, to the Rolling Stone producer guy or whatever he is: you sound like an idiot.
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