Where Is Hell?

Even though there is a town called "Hell" in Michigan, this is not actually Hell, just a clever and suitable town name. The real hell is exactly one mile below Manhattan, New York. If you ever visit Manhattan, look for orange pipes that come out of the ground. they're all over the place, and steam comes out of them. Why? Because hell is getting very crowded, due to the overwhelming number of non-mormons in the world. Great pressure is building up underneath the island, and the pipes relieve pressure to avoid the entire city from blowing up and collapsing into the fiery pit of the damned, which is inevitable anyway.
If you stand right next to a pipe and listen carefully, you will hear the screams of tormented souls below. Unfortunately, new york is usually so loud, you might not hear anything.
For more evidence that hell is under New York, look for the river of slime in Ghostbusters 2.

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