| Hey there Mike*, It's cool that you are really sensitive to her feelings, but it sounds to me as if she's still not over her ex and is confused about her feelings for you and your friend. Since you're not even sure about how she REALLY feels, would it be fair to end a good 4-year friendship over this? Especially since your friend has already caught on to how you may feel about his girlfriend. It's true that you can still say whatever you want to her AS A FRIEND, but you must respect the boundaries of their relationship. As his best friend, she's off limits to you regardless of any potential feelings for each other. As far as her comment, "Why don't you have a girlfriend?" I have several insights. When I say that to a guy, I usually mean it in a friendly way and perhaps even to hint that he's really sweet and should be hooking up with my friend. But I think that as long as she doesn't use the line, "You're like a brother to me," things should be ok. Just be safe and remember that she's still your best friend's girl for now. In the meantime, you might want to keep your options open. You never know, someone could be interested in you right now, but is waiting for you to pay attention. If I were you, I'd try and forget about her, at least for now -- a sweet guy like you can win the heart of any deserving girl. Best of luck. Let me know how everything works out, *Odessa |
| What up, Odessa, I'd had feelings for this girl for 3 months, but never did anything about it (I'm the shy type). Compared to my ex-girlfriend, this girl is an angel. But she hooked up with my best friend of 4 years (who is kind of obnoxious). The thing is, when we're alone, she keeps telling me that she's still in love with her ex. She also keeps asking me why I don't have a girlfriend yet. My friend found out that she and I have been getting close, and he threatened to beat me up if I ever got near her again. I want to tell him that I can talk to her whenever I want. How should I convey this to him, and what should I do if she ever decides to get with me instead? Mike* *Name has been changed to protect reader's privacy. |
| Planet Ex |
| Hey, readers! Feel free to email me if you have any personal questions you need answered. We may select your concern for the next week's column. Please note: We reserve the right to edit entries for web purposes only. (All questions will be answered on an individual basis as well -- that is, privately through email only. You may remain completely anonymous if you wish) Send your question(s) to us at: [email protected], with the word "Odessa" in the subject line. Please include your age, gender, and location. |
 |
| Week of July 10, 2002 |
 |
 |