The weather was so nice today that me and Matt, my best friend, decided to stay indoors all day and shop. Having maxed out my credit card with the Doctors, and spent all my cash on a ski trip, I just went along to window shop.
Department stores are amazing, no matter what you want, the personnel will always tell you, with a smile, "We don't have those here." Take the shoe department for example. Matt would sit down and try on one of their thousands of shoes and find it one size to small.
"Excuse me," he would say, "do you happen to have these in a size eleven?" The sales person would then cheerfully head into the back room, fix themselves a cup of coffee, use the restroom, and then come out with the same cheerful look and say, "I'm sorry, but we don't have that particular one in your size."
Matt tried on some more shoes and found another pair he liked. A different sales person walked by with her plastic smile and says, "Can I help you?" and without waiting for a reply, continued on her merry way to the back room. After flagging her down, Matt again asked, "Do you have this in a size eleven?"
She looked down at the shoe box, which looked exactly like every other shoe box in the store, and then looked us squarely in the faces, and without smiling said, "I'm sorry but we don't have that in your size."
Okay, it was clear that they were having fun at our expense, but Matt wanted to try one more time. He picked up a pair of shoes that were size eleven and prepared to purchase them when another sales person approached and said, "I'm sorry, but those are display models, you can't have them." Exasperated, I asked, "What do you have to sell here?" The sales person smiled benignly and headed into the back room. A few minutes later, out he came with a pair of size eleven, pink platform shoes with the words "Disco Fever" written on the sides.
We both broke down and bought a pair.