| Those of us who attended Promise Keepers
either this year or in past years have been challenged to love our wives
in a new and deeper way. However, once we leave the stadium and the dishes
need to be washed or the ballgame's on TV, it can be harder to stand in
the face of a culture that does not affirm godly husbanding and walk out
the commitments we made.
Consequently, I've come up with this list of ways
for us to honor and love our wives in the day-to-day, a "Top 10" list if
you will. I don't claim to have come up with all of these. Rather, they
are a compilation of different things I have picked up at different times
from different people, with a bit of my own thinking mixed in.
10. Give small gifts even when it's not her birthday
or her anniversary. When you go to the supermarket, pick up a rose for
her. If she likes crafts, pick up some thread or some needles. It doesn't
need to be big, but it says she was in your thoughts while you were apart.
9. Be supportive when she's troubled by something,
even if you think it's nothing to be troubled by. Instead of saying, "Don't
be silly," remember that it is real to her, and listen.
8. When she has a problem, realize that she may not
be asking you to solve the problem but just to listen and let her know
she's not facing it alone.
7. Let pleasing her be enough to please you. Do things
pleasing to her because you love her and don't do it just in order to get
her to return the favor.
6. Let the things that matter to her matter to you.
If she roots for a particular team, root with her. If she does cross-stitch,
pick out designs that you'd like to see, and maybe even ask her to teach
you how.
5. Encourage her time with other women. They can
understand what it means to be a woman in ways that we men can only hope
to get a glimpse of, and they can offer a kind of friendship, support,
and perspective on life that only other women can provide.
4. If you are going out, ask if you can run any errands
for her while you are out. If she is going out, ask if there are things
you can do for her around the house while she is gone.
3. If she is trying to improve herself, take note
and encourage her, all the while avoiding the suggestion that you'll love
her more once she improves herself.
2. Not all loving touch needs to lead to intercourse.
Our wives need to know that there are times when we are holding them because
we love them and not because we are looking forward to our own pleasure.
1. Pray for her and ask her how you can help her
grow in her individual relationship with God, not just how she can be a
better wife but how she can grow more as a child of God, including areas
that don't directly benefit you.
Needless to say, if we approach this as simply a
checklist of "things to do" without the heart attitude that should be behind
it, it won't make much difference. However, if we use this as a guideline
to direct us to where our heart wants to go, it can make your relationship
bloom. |
