Why
Dogs Are Better Than Women
Dogs
will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
Dogs
understand that you are their master.
Dogs
love it when your friends come over.
Dogs
think you sing great.
Dogs
understand that farts are funny.
Dogs
are excited by rough play.
Dogs
like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
Dogs
can appreciate excessive body hair.
Dogs
enjoy heavy petting in public.
Dogs
find you amusing when you're drunk.
Dogs
have ten breasts.
Dogs
don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
Dogs
don't borrow your shirts.
Dogs
don't mind if you give their offspring away.
Dogs
don't expect you to call when you are running late.
Dogs
don't shop.
Dogs
don't want to know about every other pet you've had.
Dogs
don't cry.
Dogs
get excited when you take out the leash and choker chains.
Dogs
agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
Dogs
understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Dogs
seldom outlive you.
A
dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
A
dog's parents never visit.
A
dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
Dogs
like it when you leave the toilet seat up.
When
a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly, you can shoot it.
It's
legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.
You
never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day.