Manchester Dilemma
Alex Ferguson calls David
Beckham into his office. ”David,” he says ,
“I’m worried about your performance the last few games. You’ve been
hopeless, completely off form”.
“Sorry boss” says David. “I’ve not been myself lately. I’ve got a few
problems at home”
“Oh dear “ says Ferguson, pretending to care. “What’s up? Posh and
Brooklyn ok”
“Oh they’re fine” says David. “It’s just that something’s really
bugging me and I’m losing sleep and everything. I can’t concentrate on my
football and it’s really messing me head up”.
“Whatever’s the matter son?” Says Fergie
“Well, boss” says David, “It’s pretty serious. Victoria bought this
jigsaw puzzle the other day and………”
“A f**king jigsaw?!!!” Shouts Sir Alex. You’re playing shite because of a
fucking jigsaw!!!!”
“Yeah boss, but you don’t understand, it’s really doing my head in!”
Says David. “it’s really hard, it’s this picture of a tiger and it looks
really easy on the box and I’m sure I’ve got all the bits and everything but
I just can’t get it right and it’s doing me head in and, and…”
“David, David, David.” Says Ferguson. “You better get a grip son, and
quick!!!”
“ok boss, ok.” Says David, “but ……..it’s this picture of a tiger and
it looks really easy on the box and I’m sure I’ve got all the bits and
everything but I can’t do it and it’s doing my head in and …….and
…….and it’s a tiger and it looks easy……and I can’t make the bits fit
and, it’s really hard, and err , sorry boss and , err it’s a tiger ,
err,….. on the box……err ……sorry boss”.
“Ok” says Sir Alex, “bring the jigsaw in and let’s have a look at it, it
can’t be that difficult”.
“Oh thanks boss” says David
So the
next day David brings the jigsaw in to Ferguson’s office. “here it is
boss” he says, showing Fergie the picture on the box
“Look, boss, it’s this tiger, right, and it’s really a good picture and
everything but I just can’t do it and it’s really hard and it’s doing my
head in and it’s this picture here of a tiger”. And Beckham empties all the
pieces from the box all over Ferguson’s desk.
Ferguson looks down at his desk, looks up with his head in his hands and says to
Beckham ……..
“David
put the f**king Frosties back in the box”.