Interesting Sayings

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. I'm schizophrenic, and so am I.........

Our Lips touched, she crossed her legs then broke my glasses.....

A friend is someone you can call to help you move.....A good friend is someone you can call to help you move a body....

Life is sexually transmitted.

Kids in the back seat of your car can cause accidents......accidents in the back seat of your car can cause kids.

Lead me not into Temptation.......I can get there myself.

When you are driving a car there are two types of pedestrians.......the quick and the dead..

If only men could be as satisfying as chocolate........

If you try to fail and succeed...what have you done?

We are born naked, wet and hungry........then things get worse.

There are three kinds of people. Those who can count and those who can't..

I souport publik edukashon.......so therr...

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all the evidence.....

He who hesitates is.........

You never know how to swear until you learn to drive.

I stayed in a really old hotel last night.......they sent me a wake up letter.

My Girlfriend is thick, I went for a walk and she asked me how long I would be out. I told her ,,,,,,,,the whole time..

There's a very fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore looking like an idiot.

How much deeper would the ocean be if it wasn't for the sponges in it?

I've just had Skylights put in my ceiling......the problem is that the people upstairs don't like them.

I can remember when the candle shop burned down. we all sang HAPPY BIRTHDAY for a week.

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

What do you do with a car if you get a flat on a road? ..................Put it in the garage silly....You live in the flat.

I think that Tourist Information Centres as useless.....I went to one the other day...... They couldn't tell me anything about anyone who was holiday here last year......

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