Friendship is...

Are you tired of all those mushy "friendship" poems? Well, here is a "friendship" poem that really speaks to true friendship and truth itself!

My friend...

When you are sad, ...I will get you plastered and help you plot revenge against the mean bastard who made you sad.
When you are blue, ...I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile, ...I will know you finally got a shag.
When you are scared, ...I will tease you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried, ...I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit moaning.
When you are confused, ...I will use little words to explain it to your thick arse.
When you are sick, ...stay the hell away from me until you're well again... I don't want whatever you have.
When you fall, ...I will point and laugh at you.
This is my oath, ...I pledge till the end. Why you may ask?

....Because you're my friend!

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