Cold Winter Evenings
Telephone
relay company night watchman Edward Baker, 31, was killed early Christmas
morning by excessive microwave radiation exposure. He was apparently attempting
to keep warm next to a telecommunications feed. Baker had been suspended on a
safety violation once last year, according to Northern Manitoba Signal Relay
spokesperson Tanya Cooke. She noted that Baker's earlier infraction was for
defeating a safety shutoff switch and entering a restricted maintenance catwalk
in order to stand in front of the microwave dish. He had told coworkers that it
was the only way he could stay warm during his twelve-hour shift at the station,
where winter temperatures often dip to forty below zero Fahrenheit (which also
is forty below zero Celsius). Microwaves can heat water molecules within human
tissue in the same way that they heat food in microwave ovens. For his Christmas
shift, Baker reportedly brought a twelve pack of beer and a plastic lawn chair,
which he positioned directly in line with the strongest microwave beam. Baker
had not been told about a tenfold boost in microwave power planned that night to
handle the anticipated increase in holiday long-distance calling traffic.
Baker's body was discovered by the daytime watchman, John Burns, who was greeted
by an odor he mistook for a Christmas roast he thought Baker must have prepared
as a surprise. Burns also reported to NMSR company officials that Baker's
unfinished beers had exploded.