Bob and Cilla
Bob Hope appears on Surprise,
Surprise with Cilla Black and after the show the two get talking in the Bar.
"I'm still very sexually active", announces the 93 year old American.
"Last week I had sex with a beautiful, young blonde actress six times in
one night. She said I was the best lover she'd ever experienced"
Cilla
is amazed at this announcement and is a little inquisitive, "Well chuck, it
has been a couple of years since 'our Bobby' died", so she asks Bob Hope if
she can accompany him back to his Hotel suite.
The
two set off and no sooner are they in the Hotel room, and Bob is all over Cilla
like a rash. After an hour of sex Bob lies down beside Cilla. "Oh my God,
that was fantastic, I've never had sex like that, it was superb" rasps an
exhausted Cilla. "We can do it again, only better, in half an hour",
says Bob. "Just let me have a 30 minute kip with you holding my balls in
your left hand and my John Thomas in your right."
Cilla
thinks its a strange request but obliges. When he wakes up they have sex again,
twice as good as the first time. "Absolutely amazing" gasps Cilla,
"It was even better the second time" "Did me holding your Balls
and John Thomas help that?" enquires Cilla.
"Nah", says Bob. "It's just the last time I shagged a Scouse
bird, when I fell asleep she if*cked off with my wallet.