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Pickering: Have you no morals man?
Doolittle: Can't afford them, Governor
George Bernard Shaw
Pygmalion
Ros: How very intriguine! (turns.) I feel like a spectator-an appalling business. The only thing that makes it bearable is the irrational belief that somebody interesting will come on in a minute...
Guil: See anyone?
Ros: No. You?
Guil: No.
Tom Stoppard
Rosencrantz and Guildenstren are Dead
"If I happened to learn what they had predestined me to do, I'd do the other thing, just to show 'em!"
Owen Wister
The Virginian

"Nothing's queer," stated the Virginian, "except marriage and lightning. Them two occurrences can still give me a sensation of surprise."
Owen Wister
The Virginian

"She is like us all. She wants a man that is a man."
Grandma Stark
Owen Wister
The Virginian
Molly Wood was regarding him saucily. "I don't think I like you," she said.
"That's all square enoiugh. You're goin' to love me before we get through. I wish yu'd come a-ridin', ma'am."
Owen Wister
The Virginian
She did not interrupt him. She waited until he was wholly finished.
"I am not the sort of wife you want," she said, with an attempt of airiness.
He answered roughly, "I am the judge of that."
Owen Wister
The Virginian
Let ye not be the first to cast a stone lest ye be in possession of a fabulous pair of wedding shoes!
-Diary of a Mad Bride

No matter how long I hold the dress over the lit stovetop it still won't ignite. I've singed my hair and melted my nail polish, but the damn dress WILL NOT DIE.
-Diary of a Mad Bride

Not sleeping has certainly been educational. Who knew that informercials fill the airwaves from 1 to 5 AM? Whatever happened to the shot of the American Flag waving in the wind? So proud, so brave, so stoic.
Screw it. I'm getting one of those Fatbusters 2000 grills. It's endorsed by four celebrity housewives, and that's good enough for me.
-Diary of a Mad Bride

The funny thing is that althought we place so much energy and importance on our wedding day, it isn't the biggest day of our life. The biggest day of your life is every day thereafter. Because it's not the pledge to love someone that matters, but the act of fulfilling that pledge that is most importants.
In other words, its only just begun.
-Diary of a Mad Bride
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