Inflation proof, non-taxable, in fact it's quite relaxable;
It can't be stolen, won't pollute, one size fits all, do not dilute.
It uses little energy, but yields results enormously.
Relieves your tension and your stress, invigorates your happiness;
Combats depression, makes you beam, and elevates your self-esteem!
Your circulation, it corrects without unpleasant side effects.
It is, I think, the perfect drug; may I prescribe, my friends... the HUG!
(And, of course, fully returnable!)
~ Henry Matthew Ward
