Finally, the week had culminated. It was refreshing to know that I was not going to be in that building for the next two days. I love the weekends--who doesn't? A periodic escape, from the malign attempts by an invidious school system to manipulate my thoughts and be a perfect model commodity, to lavishly squander next to worthless pay checks on alcohol and drugs. That weekend I had planned to chill with my friend Tony and do some 'Cid.' Tony's cool, he's eighteen and has his own place, so that, undoubtedly, made him cooler; as he was the only friend I retained that had his own place. I went home and dropped some shit off and grabbed something to eat before I gave Tony a call. I played a couple games of 'Paperboy' on the Nintendo 8 bit console, straightened myself out a bit then called him up. "What's up man? We still tripping tonight?" I had inquired to Tony. Tony replied, in his usual 'burnt out' deep voice, "Yeah man, I fronted you five hits bro. Hit me back twenty." "Right on," I said eagerly as I felt myself getting excited for what the evening would surely bring, "I'll be over in ten." "A'right, peace." I hanged the phone up, grabbed some money from my stash and shoved it into my wallet and headed over to Tony's house in my 88' blue Honda. I knocked on the door and to my surprise Tony didn't answer, rather a gothic type kid with a pale face, dark clothes and straight, shoulder-length, greasy, black hair answered the door. "Where's Tony?" I politely insisted. He rubbed his red, tired eyes, looked at the bath room door then nodded me in. I closed the door and walked over to my usual seat on the dingy "reclining" chair. "So, what's up? I'm Dan" I stated hoping for more of a reply than a shrug and a briefly stated "Jon" ensuing a chug of a National Bohemian beer. I felt awkward, searching for a topic of conversation I could provoke with this guy. A relief aroused when I heard the toilet flush and Tony joined our company. "What's up Dan? This is Jon, he's tripping with us tonight." "Ah, that's cool." I felt a momentary drab feeling but quickly shrugged it off realizing I was about to hit some acid. Tony and I were talking basics while Jon just sat and looked at us. I mentioned the acid and Tony shook himself a bit and in a higher pitch than normal declared, "Right, the acid, duh." I felt Jon looking at me with his devilish eyes. Tony retrieved the acid and exchanged my share, protected by aluminum foil, for the wrinkled twenty dollar bill. As Tony put the money in his pocket and retook his seat I heard Jon ask me in a seemingly sardonic, but serious tone "Why do you do acid?" Startled by the blunt question at hand, I simply said "to escape reality." "Oh, to escape reality" he said in a condescending manner. "Do you know anything about culture?" Before I could answer he continued, as if he knew for a fact I was ignorant to culture, which I was... "Native Americans, for example, used similar hallucinogens to undergo a phase of heightened spiritual awareness where they felt guidance, education, enlightenment and spiritual encounters could be procured. It was done as a 'religious' practice to, in a respect, be with the Gods. It's been widely used throughout history for mind expansion, spiritual awareness and enlightenment. In more modern times, artists, writers, poets etc. would use psycho actives as a tool to enhance their mind for creativity and educational purposes. It has profound cultural significance and isn't to be taken as a 'recreated post hippie trend of the culturally and socially unsound 90's.'" I nodded uncertainly. He looked displeased, if not disgusted with me. I quickly tried to fabricate something in order to redeem myself for being ignorant to the cultural significance of psycho actives throughout history and blurted out "I am an artist... I use LSD as a tool, as well... to scrape the barnacles of conformity from my mind that were cleverly welded by social manipulation and moral obligation and to break the dams that were established by thought oppressors to unleash the rivers of creative thought my mind was congenitally capable of." I seen him peering at me, then he looked at Jon with a "what the fuck is this kid doing here" look. He paused, lit a cigarette, took a drag and refocused to my attention. "Bullshit." He frankly stated then shook his head disapprovingly and sighed "Just have fun tripping kid, you'll learn about culture one day." He didn't buy my ranting about mind suppression, so naturally, my face turned red like a napkin soaking up a puddle of blood from the embarrassment. I didn't hesitate any further, I felt stupid and awkward and in an attempt to reestablish my "cool" facade I unfolded the foil and took all five hits at once. Tony smiled and Jon remained bitter looking. I didn't care about this guy anymore. Tony took three hits and Jon took four hits. Shortly after everyone seemed calm. Tony pensively offered beer to me and Jon. I drank the beer, it felt cold and smooth running down to my stomach. The feeling that I was drinking seemed to perpetuate, but faded. I started tripping. I felt the chair I had been sitting on, which was usually rather firm, start to feel mushy, almost like a seat full of mud. I had a relaxed smile on my face, enjoying the experience. Moments later my feet started to feel as if they were rising a bit and returning to a stagnate position. I started to trip harder, when I breathed I felt a subtle breeze over my face. I looked at the white paint stains on my black jeans moving around. I wasn't paying attention to Tony, who was playing a video game and Jon who was watching the game. I turned to look at Jon and Tony and I noticed Jon wasn't looking at Tony at all, he had fixed his stern, virulent eyes on me. I felt a wave of slight panic through my body; a buzz kill. I looked at him in return and raised my beer to him as if making a cheer. He didn't budge. His eyes remained on me until Tony said "check this out" and his eyes struggled away from me and onto the screen. I felt the hair on my arms rising. I took a sip of beer and it felt hot for a moment. I sat there almost worried until I heard Jon laughing at something Tony was showing him. I felt safe again and relieved. I've never heard this kid laugh before, so it was a good sign to me. I regained a serene mood and started enjoying my trip again. The arm rests started to feel as if they were swinging outward and back to regular position. I was having fun with the chair. Soon the chair was like a waterbed again, my feet were moving up and down, the arm rests were swaying and a gentle breeze swept over my face every time I took a breath of air. I started to trip even harder, however, and when I took a deep breath I saw myself inhale a misty pink patch of air. I almost choked but I knew it wasn't real. "Hey Tony, this shit visual?" Being heavily into the game "yeah" dribbled from his lips. "Really visual" Jon said with an evil grin on his expression. "Who do you think sold Tony the acid?" He stared at me for a moment and returned to Tony's game which seemed to entertain him as much as it did Tony. I underwent another buzz kill when my mind started drifting off. Who was this guy? Who is he? Where did Tony meet him? I've never seen him before, anywhere. This guy that I, and I assumed Tony, didn't know too well just sold us extremely strong acid. I started getting paranoid. I saw my hand from the corner of my eye produce four fingers from my knuckles that stuck straight up and quickly vanished. Then the black bandana tied around my wrist started amalgamating with my skin. I shook my hand as if shaking a fly off of it and the trails hung about seconds after. I was starting to trip very hard. And I wandered off in thought again. Who is this guy? He's strange. He's a dark stranger. Where did he come from? What was he doing here? What was he going to do? I don't know why I thought what I thought, but it was probably the biggest mistake I made all night. He's looking at me again. Why's he looking at me? Can he hear what I am thinking. He just blinked his eyes. He knows. He just blinked them twice in a row. He knows for sure. I've got it. You're planning to murder me tonight. He blinked twice again. For reasons beyond my comprehension I played with the possibility in my mind that this person was planning to murder me. I became very worried as I was almost at the apex of my trip. I was in a very suffocating world. I leaned back in my chair and I thought the back rest broke off. My heart started pounding. I lifted the back rest and put my feet on the ground. Oh no. I hated even thinking about hearing people talk about water while they were tripping, but sure enough my feet were in a superficial puddle of water--so I thought. I started to shiver uncomfortably when I started thinking about tiny insects crawling all over my arms and going up my body. My arms started to become itchy. When I looked down at them I seen tiny centipedes, spiders, mites, and various other insects crawling all over my arms. I quickly realized I was only looking at my arm hair. This started to suck real bad. I was having the worse trip ever, and I've never had a bad trip before. It was the karma of Jon. His malevolent presence overwhelmed me. I developed in my mind that he was planning to murder me, very quietly and secretively. [Note: In italics, What Dan believes Jon is saying is in dashes - -] What are you planning? -You know what I am going to do, you just don't know how I am going to do it- I don't care how, the more important matter to me, is when. I started thinking me and him were having a telepathic conversation and agreed not to speak aloud. When are you going to kill me? -You're obviously a fool.- Why am I a fool? -Because, you already know when I am going to kill you.- Is that a fact? -That's something that needs to be confirmed in your mind Danny boy.- Why do you want to murder me? -It's clearly evident why- You're not going to kill me. -Aren't I?- That's impossible. -Impossible? No. Factual? Time will tell.- I don't think so. -I am surely an atrocious being- No you're not -Stop lying to yourself Danny boy- Who are you? -I am simply the other half of you.- That's bullshit. -I am killing you, because you want me to.- That's insane. -Insanity is much like a game, buoyant, you play, you play, you play, then eventually you'll lose.- What does that mean? -You know quite well what it means.- I haven't the slightest idea what you mean. -very well then, I play cards, for your soul and win I must the black may ark, gone forever, never to display the sound of the music which wholesomely, like the fragrance of a pie cooling on a window sill, drifting into the crisp air to find a merchant of lies.- I know what you're saying, we're not much different after all. -No, we're not because I am you and I must rip thy heart from thy breast and wove you into morbid splendor.- The avail of this corrosive horror has relinquished once more on the face, thy serpent has delivered thy child from evil. A crest filled lunar of neurological endorsements. -Alas Sir Daniel, arise and with chivalry take the steel, and honor thy name that dust not flee.- The supposed telepathic conversation between us started to become as incomprehendable to me as why I was thinking this in the first place. I heard Jon asking if he could play the game and Tony refusing. I looked over at them, regaining some control. "You tripping Dan?" Tony asked. "Yu-yeah-I... Am" I mumbled as it was hard to produce speech. Tony chuckled and added "Me too man." I heard Jon ask him for the game again. I drifted back into my own little world but was quickly brought out of it and into a shock of terror when I heard Jon say aloud, "I've been talking to Dan!" He, of course, didn't really say that, but I was certain he did. [In actuality he said, "You've been hogging it man!"] I got up and moved quickly to the bathroom and locked the door. I sat down on the closed toilet and was trying to pull myself together. I was then at the apex of my trip on five hits of what I later found to be called "Dracula" or "Mental Trick." I started thinking about intricate ways Jon was going to murder me. I started to think that he was controlling the video game, Tony wasn't, and he was brainwashing Tony into joining him and murdering me, together. I believed that the conversation we had was indeed true. I then started fabricating in my delusional state of mind that Jon was near me. Tony knocked on the door. "You ok man, you've been in there for a half an hour." "I'm cool" I replied, "Just taking a shit, it's kinda difficult." He laughed at headed back to playing games. I didn't think Tony was in on the murder anymore. That was a relief. I was looking at myself in the mirror, watching my face moving around. I started thinking that maybe Jon was going to murder Tony as well. I didn't hear anything out there. I continued to look in the mirror for a bit longer, then I washed my hands. As soon as the water hit my hands I believed that my hands were reduced to water and I went into an overwhelming state of panic. I looked up and I seen Jon's face in the mirror grinning evilly at me. Then the shower curtains rustled a bit and I was petrified; I thought Jon was there waiting to strike. I screamed and tried to reach for the door knob, but the door knob wasn't there. I rubbed my hands up and down the door-- but no knob. I couldn't believe it. I looked all around in a blaze of panic to see the knob where the toilet flusher usually rested. The peak had brought me to a dream-like mind alerting state of consciousness. I reached for the handle and flushed the toilet thinking that I had turned to knob to let me out. I heard faint voices outside but the roar of the toilet flushing guised their voices. As the toilet flushed, and roared, I felt the oxygen being sucked out of the room and down the toilet. The oxygen was gone. The voices became louder as I charged the door and rammed it head first and fell back on the cold floor. As I was falling I saw a parade of illusions--I wasn't sure if my eyes were opened or not, I imagine they were not... A green neon sign of a finger pointing, turned into a gun that a 'Bang' flag came out of that started dripping wood flakes. All behind this scene was children running toward each other, jumping and morphing into singular articles of food. Busy traffic noises accompanied images of silent, black & white 20's type movies where an old, bald, railroad worker was screaming with a smile on his face and his hands grabbing the side rims of his hat. A jump rope turned into a cannon which shot from it smells that I could see. Everything then got really sparkly and turned bright yellowish white, then a cold, desolate black. I remember nothing during the five hours I was passed out. I was revived in a hospital room with Tony standing there with Jon. I was initially startled to see Jon, but I wasn't really bothered by it considering the pain from slamming my head on the ground. I rested for a while and my parents took me home. Tony told them that I slipped because he had just taken a shower and I didn't know the floor was soaked. He further told them that his carpets had just been cleaned so shoes were to be taken off. I didn't get in any trouble, luckily for me I wasn't killed. I later discovered that Jon was a friend of Tony's from a while back, and he was a humanitarian, vegetarian, culture freak who just thought I was a philistine, but didn't mean any harm to me whatsoever. In fact he was the one, using his knowledge regarding first aid, that kept me from dying until they could drive to the hospital.

The moral of this story is to never underestimate the power of your mind, it's definetely capable of more than you understand. Also, this brings a good point up about prejudice, if Dan wasn't prejudice to Jon, he wouldn't have had a bad trip. If Jon would have tried to have been more understanding, and more interactive with the situation, it wouldn't have affected Dan negatively the way it had and everyone would have been better off :).

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