"Birth"

by Lianne Olive Hennig

Awake in the night, with infinite awareness of the Life inside.
Quelling fright, let patience bide.
My button throbs atop the mound, my abdomen distorts.
A sleeping form, beside, sleeps sound while I wrangle with my thoughts;
Feeling uneasy, wondering when it will begin.
Feeling queasy, yet longing for the Life within.

Wait ~ I feel a hardness build, my mound feels like a rock!
My mind is with adrenalin filled as I cope with mounting shock…
And yet, no pain.  I feel the hardness leave,
The surface soft again; and yet my breath does heave 
As I await the start of pain.

An hour then two go by till waves take my breath away.
The morning light draws nigh ~ it may be born today!
Pain radiates from my back yet feels but mild.
I think I have the knack to bear a child.
Waken up my mate, heart beating steady.
Nought to do but wait.  My bag is ready.
Ringing the hospital bell, I’m feeling tense.
My stomach isn’t well ~ I hate suspense!
Finally, all forms are signed: they’re taking me away ~ No, wait!
The spotless nurses look resigned: I do not want to leave my mate…
They try to say I’ll be all right, a temporary separation.
They try to calm my mounting fright as they begin my preparation:
Shaving my modesty away, rinsing my inside out, and
While they work, they are so gay; and still, I feel some doubt.
They check the pressure of my blood.
They listen to the baby’s heart.
They time contractions when they bud, while I play my silent part.
My mate is finally ushered in.  I wallow in my state.
He offers up a sheepish grin.  I smile but pain is great.

Soon, my body wracks with pain, it makes me gasp for breath.
Waves overlap, again, again ~ I fight impending death…
A stream of warmth begins to spout, soaking my nightdress.
It’s just the “waters” gushing out; but my mind could not care less.
The pain and I are far away, fighting a battle by nightmare bound.
Not even tender love can sway the tranceful dance to which I’m ground.
Oh God!  Oh no, the pain’s too much!  My body tenses in its task.
I do not feel the gentle touch that gives to me a mask.
Awareness does not enter me.  This is but a bad dream…
The blinding light is all I see, but things are not what they seem.
Oh!  Now I’m like to tear apart, the pressure is so great ~
I scream and sit up with a start, my back supported by my mate.

Don’t bear down yet, to me, say they; but now I cannot halt.
My weakened will cannot obey and I cannot lie at fault.
My burning insides tear me apart ~
Oh life, I hold you dear!
The Doctor’s hands, within me, dart: the head will soon appear ~
A bloodied roundness, jutting out, crying steadily.
A push to get the shoulders out but the rest comes readily.
A wrinkled warmth upon my breast: my newborn, mewling son,
Finally from my body wrest.  My battle now half won.
I see his tiny gentleness within my weak arms lie. 
I cannot stave exhaustion and so begin to cry.
My proud spouse leans to give a kiss.  He beams with love at me,
And I feel beginnings of new bliss ~ now my body’s free.

My babe is taken from my breast.  The placenta finally comes away,
And then I’m washed and given rest.
I cannot sleep but quietly lie awake and
At my shrivelled belly smirk, and think I passed the test but
The output was worth all the work, and
I feel fairly blessed.