Han and Chewie stood at the guard's station, punching random buttons. Suddenly, a voice cackled over the intercomm.
"Guard, what is going on down there?!" demanded an insistent voice.
"OH, everything's under control!" Han said trying to sound official. "Situation normal!"
"It didn't sound like that," a voice snapped back in a non-nonsense tone. "What happened?"
"Uh, well, one of the guards experienced a weapon malfunction," Han stammered, his temporary officialese lapsing into nervousness. "No problem now--we're all fine, thanks. How about you?"
"We're sending a squad up," the voice announced suddenly.
Han could almost smell the suspicion at the other end. What to say? He spoke more eloquently with the business end of a pistol.
"Negative--negative. We have an energy leak. Give us a few minutes to lock it down. Large leak--very dangerous."
"Well, we'll still send out the troops," said the voice.
"NEGATIVE!" Han practically shouted. He grinned suddenly. "OHMIGOD! Someone spilt hair gel all over the floor! Ahhh, get a mop! Get a mop!" Han yelled at no one in particular.
"Weapon malfunction, energy leak, hair gel spill...Who is this? what's your operating--?"
Pointing his pistol at the panels, Han blew the instrumentation to silent scraps. "It was a dumb conversation anyway," he murmured. Turning he shouted down the corridor, "Hurry it up, you two! We're going to have company!"
Jaren, who was working diligently, redoubled his efforts in hot-wiring the door. "I think I got it..." he trailed off as he placed one last wire on the panel. Immediately, Jaren stepped back, waiting for the doors to open. As he stood, a second pair of blast doors slammed down upon the first pair. "Dang it!" cried Jaren. He tried again, reconnecting wires. Finally the doors beeped and hissed open to reveal Princess Leia curled up in a ball on the seat, singing oddly.
"Wow, she's even prettier in person..." Luke said, drooling. Jaren sighed and kicked Luke in the behind.
"Leia?" Leia? LEIA!!' Jaren yelled. Leia looked up at him, then suddenly shook her head, trying to clear her mind.
"Jaren? Oh, you're alive!! Help me!!! I can't take the music any longer! Leia moaned. As if on cue, Luke quickly walked over to her and held out his hand with a devilish grin on his face.
"Hi, I'm Luke Skywalker, your hero, m'lady," he said. Leia stared at him with a look of disgust on her face.
"Ew. Let's go, I'm better." With that, she pushed Luke aside and stormed out of the cell. Han and Chewie came running down the hall to them frantically.
"We're in trouble!!! We gotta go now! They're sending up troops, and more troops!" Han yelled. He suddenly noticed Leia and smoothed back his hair. "Hey, you're the princess..."
"You disgusting pig. All of you!! Come on, let's get outta here," Leia demanded.
Jaren looked around him and sighed. Luke was staring at Leia and Han was trying to look cool. Chewie was picking at his fur, apparently looking for fleas.
"Okay, that's it. I'm outta here." Jaren took out his blaster and fired a small hole up in the ceiling. "You guys go ahead, and I shall check out the surroundings."
Han snapped out of his cool mood and turned to look at Jaren. "You sure?" he said.
"NAAAARRRFFF! RAAWWOOOEEE!" roared Chewie.
Jaren looked at Han for interpretation.
"Chewie says no, that's a bad idea," Han said.
"Well, someone has to keep an eye out," said Jaren. With that, he bent down, jumped, and easily pulled himself up through the hole.
"Jaren!! Don't you dare leave me with these morons and a talking rug!! Jaren!!" Leia screamed. Jaren laughed and crawled through a series of overhead pipes. A few minutes later, he came to a dead end.
"Eh, things were made to be broken." He took out his blaster again and blew a hole below him. Jaren jumped down and landed in an empty room. He got himself back up, dusted his clothes, and quietly walked around from room to room. Pretty soon, he heard kids' voices yelling at each other.
"NO! I wanna be Darth Maul if we play pretend!" yelled one.
"NO! You were Darth Maul last time! It's my turn!" yelled another.
Jaren was very curious by now. He slunk down the hall and peered in the door. Two kids, one girl and one boy, were tugging a black outfit between each other.
"Blah. Darth Maul? Who the heck would want to be him? Number one, he so cannot fight, number two, legend says he had bad breath"Jaren muttered. Suddenly, the two kids turned toward the door and stared at him.
"Hey! Who are you?!" the girl demanded.
"Dang it, did I speak out loud?" Jaren thought.
"No, I read your mind dummy. I inherited my mommy's intelligence, unlike some people that I know of!" the girl retorted, glaring at the boy beside her.
"A little Jedihahaha, easy prey." Jaren quickly blocked his mind from incoming transmissions.
"Hey, I can't read his mind anymore!" the girl pouted. The boy squeezed his eyes tight and clenched his fists. Finally, he stopped.
"I can't either!!!" he cried out.
"Hey, I don't feel like arguing or playing any games with you two. By the way, are you guys related?" Jaren asked.
"We're twins...Jedi twins to be exact. Chye and Elleim! I'm the smarter one cause I was born first," Chye exclaimed.
"Uh-huh. Well I'm...Jaren. Nice to you meet you both," he said hesitantly. He felt the need to be cautious, especially around those two...
"Anyways, do you guys have anything fun to do around here? Computers? Computer systems? Anything relating to wires and hacking?" Jaren asked. Elleim's eyes lit up.
"Yeah! Over there..." she pointed to a huge computer screen with a lot of buttons and wires. Jaren's eyes lit up with joy.
"Whoa baby! Jackpot!" He quickly whipped out the hacker's kit and ran over to the screen. Before the twins could blink, he had already accessed the entire base's system.
"Let see...what havoc can I cause...hmm...lock the bathroom doors...set the sliding doors on a mad rage, or...aha! The trash compactors! I should just let them run off and on! Perfect!" Jaren punched a few buttons and cracked his knuckles. "Child's play."
"Wow, you're good...teach me!" Chye exclaimed. "I want to learn how to mess up the computer system! I think it would fun to like...let's say, lock Vader in the bathroom!"
"Oh, you're so immature Chye. Hmmph. Boys, they just don't have a life." Elleim tossed her hair over her shoulder and walked over to a chair.
Jaren tapped a few buttons and the schematics for the surveillance cameras outside Vader's private lavatory. He punched in a few commands and grinned devilishly. "There. Next time Vader enters, the doors will automatically lock fast until someone from the outside inputs the word "delutis" in the password blank."
"WOW!" Chye said again. "You must teach me!"
Jaren began to go into a long-winded discussion about hacking. Elleim rolled her eyes and stood. She walked out of the room and headed back for her and Chye's quarters. As she strode down the corridor, a thought formed in her head. Turning the corner quickly, she yanked out an air ventilation grill cover and dropped it. The grill clattered to the ground as Elleim crept inside. She began crawling...and crawling...and crawling. Her photographic memory served her well, because there were thousands upon millions of ventilation shafts in the Death Star and one could easily get lost. Eventually, she found her way into the "sidekick's" antechamber, where Ttocs and Aciré were having a little conference. Elleim tried to make herself comfortable in the little shaft and sat down to wait for the conversation to turn to the olden days, as she knew it always did.
"So," said Ttocs, "The next time the chocolate lady comes, you're picking up the shipment."
"We'll see..." said Aciré. "Now, is that all the business for today?"
"Yup," said Ttocs.
"Good. It's a pretty day isn't it?"
Elleim sighed heavily and shifted her weight. This was going to be a looooong wait.
Half an hour later, Elleim awoke from her nap with a start. That word, had she dreamt it? Or was it spoken? She peered out the ventilation grill, only to see Ttocs and Aciré both still sitting chatting.
"Stop picking on me, Ttocs! So what if I was already eleven by the time I first met Yoda?" cried Aciré.
Ttocs shook his head and grinned. "I still remember what he said in that first audience. Ahhem," Ttocs cleared his throat and prepared his best Yoda imitation. 'A new master, you request, young Aciré. For your formal training, to the Jedi Academy you need to go anyways. With Anakin, you can go. A new teacher there, Ttocs can be. A shortage of good teachers at the Jedi Academy, I understand there is'." Ttocs concluded his little monologue and laughed devilishly. "And that is where it all ended, for you anyways."
Aciré glowered. "If it wasn't for me, you never would have come to meet Darth Palpajeff! You'd still be living on that miserable hunk of rock with your little wife, what was her name? Raana?"
Ttocs frowned and pouted. "Well, it's all in the past now."
Elleim leaned forward eagerly. From what she had gathered from this little conversation, the two Dark lords used to not be on the dark side.
"Remember the ill-fated Padawan switching mission? The one where Qui-Gon found Anakin?" said Aciré suddenly.
"Ahh, yes!" said Ttocs. "How could I possibly forget? Ah, the Bye-Bye Birdie review, the Lommes Pommes, Robann and Obi-Wan's first date, the internet scam, Jas-Min freaking Robann out. Ahhh, the memories." Ttocs smiled.
"Speaking of Obi-Wan, did we get an I.D. on those crazed cloaks that were found in the Falcon?" queried Aciré.
"Sort of. One of them, the bright pink one with black lettering, said "Ben." I have a team working on finding all the Bens in the galaxy. So far, they've found..." Ttocs trailed off as he flipped through his clipboard, "247,903,587,573,194,587 different Bens. They predict there's a few billion more too."
"Oh, well, that's not too bad. They should get through all of those in a few years," said Aciré placidly.
Elleim shook her head from inside the shaft. These mouse worshipers were insane.
"Ttocs, have you explored the possibility that this Ben could be Obi-Wan?" said Aciré suddenly.
"No...do you think that could be it?" said Ttocs. He whipped out his communicator and talked to the other end. "The team is investigating it right--" He was cut off as his communicator began beeping wildly. Ttocs talked to it again. His eyes opened wide as he shut off the communicator. "They're 99.999999999999% sure that it's the same person."
"Wow, that was fast!" said Aciré. "Let's go tell Darth Palpajeff."
"Shouldn't we inform Lord Vader first?" Ttocs asked.
"I guess," said Aciré. The two of them got up and headed for the door to leave the room.
Elleim shifted her weight and accidentally leaned against the air shaft grate. It clanked open with a resounding thud and Elleim tumbled out of the shaft. Immediately, she jumped up and crawled back into the shaft as fast as she could.
Ttocs and Aciré spun around when they heard the clunk. They had turned in time to see Elleim's long brown hair flash by as she scrambled into the shaft again. Aciré started to go after her, but Ttocs stopped her.
"She can't have been there very long. I mean, we would have felt her presence. She and Chye and Kendao must have been playing hide-and-seek again. She wouldn't have heard anything important." With that Ttocs grabbed Aciré's sleeve and dragged her out of the room to go meet Darth Vader.
"But Kendao doesn't fit in the air shafts anymore..." thought Aciré quietly. Something was amiss.

Back in the prison block, Han, Chewie, Luke and Leia were firing in vain at the recently arrived Imperial troops.
"STUPID IMPERIAL TROOPS!" shouted Leia.
"WE KNOW, LADY! GIVE US A BREAK!" shouted one of them back.
"I've had just about enough of this," said Han. "Chewie, get up through the hole that Jaren blasted."
As Chewie worked his way up, Luke was firing at the troops, pondering. "How did that poor, poor, homeless slave boy know Leia? I'm so very confused." He was jerked out of his thoughts by a loud growl.
"NAAAAARRRF!! REOOOWWWRRE!!! AARRRRGGGHHH!!" roared Chewie.
"Whadya mean, you're stuck?" said Han.
"The walking carpet is stuck in the escape route?" said Leia. "Great. Kid!" she said, addressing Luke.
"I'm no kid. I'm as old as you are. My birthday is in just--"
"SHUT UP!" she yelled. "I don't care when your birthday is. MOVE!"
Luke promptly jumped away from the panel he was cowering next to. Leia blasted it to bits to reveal a chute of some sort. "C'mon," she yelled, "let's go!" She jumped in the chute and disappeared down the shaft. Han was yanking on Chewie's legs, and Luke was standing there, drooling.
"Wow, she's brave," he said dreamily. Han stopped pulling on Chewie and reached over and shoved Luke to the floor.
"What was that for?" he whined, getting up.
"It was Annya," replied Han. "Now help me get this hairball outta the hole." The two of them worked swiftly and managed to yank Chewie out. Luke jumped into the shaft next, followed by Chewie, then Han.

Leia was sliding down the seemingly endless shaft. Suddenly, without warning, she stopped in the middle of the tube, where it evened out.
"Stupid Imperials can't even plan a chute correctly," she murmured to herself. She was jarred out of her thoughts by a high-pitched screech coming down the chute. She spun around in the middle of the tunnel to see Luke flying towards her, limbs flailing in all directions. His eyes were shut tight and he was screaming at the top of his lungs.
"Kid, watch out--" said Leia as Luke rammed into her. Almost immediately, Chewie smashed into Luke, followed by Han a few seconds later.
"Ow, I feel like a pancake," said Luke painfully. "Ow."
"So what do we do now?" said Han. "Climb back up?"
"Got meeeeeee........." said Leia as the bottom of the tunnel suddenly opened as she fell through, voice trailing off as she went deeper. Luke, who had been leaning on Leia, fell through next. Chewie and Han, crouched next to the opening, wondering.
"Well, I suppose we should rescue them, eh Chewie?" said Han.
"FFAAAAAARRRNNNN!" roared Chewie and jumped into the hole, followed by Han.
"WooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOUCH!" Han cried out. He landed in a pile of stinky, revolting trash.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, NARF!" Chewie yelled, falling on top of Han.
"Aw Chewie. Great, now I'm up to my waist in disgusting, unpurified water," Han complained. "Now, where's Luke and Leia?"
"Helpthis kid refuses to get off of me"Leia moaned in the corner. Luke was standing on her back, clutching the walls.
"It's so scary in here. And the gross, smelly water! I don't want to get my clothes wet"Luke whimpered.
"Hello! For the last time, you're wearing that Storm Trooper outfit!!" Leia screeched.
"Oh brother"Han sighed. "Now I see why Jaren booked outta here" Suddenly, the walls began creaking and moving towards them slowly.
"We're in a trash compactor!" Leia screamed. She pushed Luke off her back and began climbing up onto some trash. "Come on! We don't have much time! The walls are closing in inch by inch every 4 minutes!"
"Oh no!!! HELP!!!" Luke wailed. "I'm too young to die!"
"Maybe it is a good time to die" Han thought.

Meanwhile, Elleim rejoined Jaren and Chye. She found them still hovering over the computer system, talking and rearranging things.
"WowI'm so impressed. Where did you learn this stuff?" Chye asked adoringly.
"Ehruns in the family. My mom is experts at this kind of stuff, so are my brothers and sisters. But, of course, I know more cause I'm my mom's favorite," Jaren said.
"Cool! That's neat that you're all expert hackers!" Chye exclaimed. "All I have is Elleim, and she's boring as heck."
"Am not!" The two boys whirled around to find Elleim standing there with her arms crossed. "You are so mean Chye! I'm telling Mom!"
"Oh yeah! Well I'm telling her you went off spying again!" Chye retorted.
"Oh yeah, and how do you know! You've been here all the time!" she said smugly.
Chye stepped from the computer and pointed to the screen. "Hey stupid, you forget that the system here can show where people are located, including in the vents!"
"Do you guys always argue?" Jaren asked.
"Yes," they said in unison.
"Chye?! Elleim?! Where are you?" The three kids froze in their tracks. Footsteps were heard coming down the hall.
"Oh! If they find out I've been messing with the systemI'm dead!" Chye wailed. Jaren quickly ran to the computer and began typing furiously.
"Okayunlocking bathroom doorsstopping trash compactorsshutting down chocolate sauce valves! Done!" With that, Jaren flipped off the system and hide his hacker's kit just as Aciré and Ttocs came walking into the room.
"Ah! There you two are. Now we just have to findum, who are you?" Aciré asked, pointing to Jaren.
"This is Jaren, Mom," Chye informed her. Aciré raised an eyebrow suspiciously. "I don't remember any other members having kids running amuck here. Its just Ttocs and I"
"Ohhhmaybe he's Dalphine and Quek's kid! You know, they've been having this affair thing going on and off. Poor, poor boy, being the product of an affair gone wrong," Ttocs said, patting him on the head.
"What is up with me being a poor, poor boy"Jaren thought. "Well, I'm sorry to tell you, but no."
"Ah. Dang, maybe it's Dalphine and Gegori then. Or Dalphine and Anedani. You can't trust Dalphine these daysOuch! What was that for?" Ttocs demanded after Aciré pinched him on the arm.
"Looklook at the eyes" she said quietly. Ttocs looked at Jaren's eyes, then shrugged.
"So what? They're colored contacts. Nobody in this universe has brown eyes with green" he trailed off slowly.
Jaren nervously shifted his weight to his other leg. Aciré and Ttocs stared moving closer to him. He took a step back. They took a step more. He walked backwards until he hit a wall. Jaren hit the wall so hard that several items fell out from his pockets. Aciré blanched and Ttocs moaned.
"Thethe voodoo dolls! And that lightsaber!!" she said. She picked up one of the dolls with purple streaked hair. "And this is Obi-Wan! I recognize that purple hair gel anywhere!"
"The son of Beanie!" Ttocs yelled. Everyone stared at him. "Whoops, sorry, I didn't mean to speak that loud," he said sheepishly.
"Time to go," Jaren whispered to himself. In a flash, he used the Force to gather up all his items. He pulled out his blaster and blew a hole in the ceiling above. Saluting the others, he jumped up and quickly scampered away through the vents.
"Oh..ohohohohoh." Aciré breathed in and out. Chye quickly ran to her.
"Mom! Are you okay? Please! You're sounding like Vader and that isn't good!" he cried out.
Ttocs took his moment to recollect his thoughts. He quickly turned around to face Elleim. "Elleim! Where is Kendao!"
The little girl shrugged. Ttocs sighed. "Well, find him then!" Without a word, she scampered off to find the older boy. Ttocs sighed and pulled out his communicator. Briefly, he talked to Lord Vader and then jumped up in the hole that Jaren had blasted, using the Force and the hand-held computer he had to track the 'Son of Beanie'.

Annya and Obi-Wan silently walked through the ship's corridors, trying to find the tractor beam energy valve. So far, they had not bumped into any Storm Troopers.
"Come this way Annya. I feel the vibes," Obi-Wan said. For once, he was actually using the Force correctly.
"I think we're almost there," she answered. They rounded a corner and came into a huge walkway. Off to the right was a huge sign that said "TRACTOR BEAM POWER."
"This is it Father! I'll stand guard while you shut it off," she said.
"Why me?" he asked, scratching his head. "Oops, I need more hair gel." Obi-Wan whipped out a can of Wicked Jedi Gel and squirted some onto his head. "There, that's better."
"Go Father, and just turn it off," Annya pleaded. Obi-Wan nodded, already forgetting his argument, and hurried over to shut down the levers. Annya stood outside the door, watching for any intrusions. Suddenly, she heard footsteps behind her.
"Are you done already" her voice trailed off as she stood face to face with a tall boy with black hair.
"How did you get in here?!" Annya squeaked nervously.
"Umm, there's another door over there," the boy pointed. "This is a walkwaytwo doors so people can walk through."
"Uhhh, oh, sure," stammered Annya.
"My name is Kendao," Kendao said genuinely.
"I'm, uh, uh, shoot...OH! Annya," she said.
Kendao nodded. "I didn't realize that there were any other kids on board. I mean, I thought it was just Chye, Elleim, and me. Oh wait! I got it. You must me Dalphine and Grekea's affair kid. Dad tells me about Dalphine all the time!"
"Uh, no. Who's Chye and Elleim? And your dad lives here too?" she queried.
"Oh, Chye and Elleim are Aciré's twins and I'm Ttocs' son."
Suddenly, instantaneously, Obi-Wan appeared from around the console, grabbing Kendao from behind.
"What did you just say?" Obi-Wan demanded.
"Uh..." squeaked Kendao, "I was saying she must me Dalphine and Grekea's affair kid--"
"NO!" thundered Obi-Wan, "After that."
"That Chye and Elleim are Aciré's twins and I'm Ttocs' son?"
"Yes! You are the son of Ttocs?" Obi-Wan said.
"Err...yes. Is that a problem?"
"Yes, it most certainly is," replied Obi-Wan. "I'm keeping you hostage. Annya, put some Force-proof handcuffs on this kid. Then don't let him out of your sight."
"Wait," said Kendao, "I'm confused. Why would Dalphine and Grekea's affair kid and you, you weirdo, want to keep me hostage?" Kendao whined.
Annya shook her head. "Let me spell a few things out for you, pathetic looser boy. I am NOT Dalphine and Grekea's affair kid. I do not even know who Dalphine and Greakea are. I am Annya Kenobi, daughter of the infamous Jedi Knight, Obi-Wan Kenobi. And this is my father, Obi-Wan Kenobi."
Kendao's mouth fell open. Just then, a young girl came running down the walkway.
"Kendao!!! Ttocs wants to see you ASAP!" she called.
"Who's that?" Obi-Wan whispered in Kendao's ear.
"Elleim, Aciré's twin," he said.
"Wait, what's going on here?" asked Elleim. "Who are these people? Oh, boy more kids?! Are you Dalphine and Gurland's affair kid? Or Dalphine and Rafel's?"
Obi-Wan sighed and clapped Elleim in Force-proof cuffs.
"You're Obi-Wan Kenobi!" she said suddenly.
"How did you..." said Annya.
"Oh, I inherited my mommy's power of reading minds," she said.
"Annya," said Obi-Wan, "I'm done here. Let's get back to the Falcon." Together they escorted their captives out of the hallway.

Beanie's black head popped around from the corner. Robann's head appeared above Beanie's.
"See anything?" said Robann.
"Nope," replied Beanie. "I still can't figure out how we got past all those guards."
"Trust the Force, my young Padawan," said Robann.
Beanie glowered. "C'mon let's go," she said. The two old friends stole down the hallway. Two hallways met. One hall was labeled "Tractor Beam--This Way" and the other labeled "Bridge."
"You take the bridge, I'll go down to the tractor beam," said Beanie.
"No, you go to the bridge, you know how to hack your way in," responded Robann.
"All right."
Robann watched as Beanie stole down the hallway. She sighed and hurried down the other hall. Minutes later, she heard voices.

"Father, we're lost! Let's find a map!" came a voice.
"No!" replied another voice, "The Dashing Obi-Wan can find his way in any ship!"
It was at that point that Robann came out of her hiding spot.
"Obi-Wan Kenobi!!" she yelled. Obi-Wan stopped in his tracks.
"AHHHHHH!! ROBANN!" he screamed.
"Mother! Thank gosh you're here!! Now we're saved!" Annya cried with happiness.
Robann smiled smugly. "I always knew how to put on a grand entrance" she thought.
"Now, what is going on? Why are you two here on the Death Star?" she asked.
Annya and Obi-Wan looked at each other. "Death Star?" Robann, Kendao, and Elleim sighed in unison.
"You came here to do whatever business and you don't even know what it is?" Elleim asked incredulously. "You're even stupider than I thought!"
"Shut up!" Kendao kicked Elleim. Robann turned to them with a confused expression on her face.
"Now, who are you two? And why are you wearing Force proof cuffs?" she asked.
"Robann dear, they're our prisoners! They're Jedi children!" Obi-Wan explained. "And I caught them both! Now, what do you think of that?"
Robann looked at both of them. Elleim suck out her tongue and pouted. Kendao was gazing at something behind Robann's shoulder.
"Uh-huh, Jedi childrenmore like weird demented kids" she thought.
"Hey! I am not demented! I'm intelligent for my age! Just wait Jedi Oldly! I'll get even with you!" Elleim yelled.
"Okay, I take that backwe better get going nowwhat is the matter with that one? He looks like he's been drugged." Kendao still looked spaced out. Robann gave Obi-Wan a suspicious look.
"Meno no nonow Robann, don't get any ideasI"Obi-Wan fumbled. Robann raised an eyebrow, then turned to face Annya.
"Annya dear, make sure yourAnnya?" Annya had the same look on her face. Robann looked at Kendao, then back at Annya, then at both of them. They were staring at each other.
"Ohhhh! Annya, are you interested in him? Finally, you show an interest in the male species!!" Robann cried out happily. "Ohhh, how cute!!"
Annya stopped staring at Kendao and turned a bright red. "MOTHER!"
"I can't believe my baby girl <sniff> has truly grown up! This will be so much fun! Getting you dressed up to go on dates, us staying up late to make sure you get home before your curfew! Ohh, I'm so proud of you Annya! And he is a cute one! Oh so very cute! Don't you think so Obi-Wan? Ohhhh, I'm so thrilled I could cry!" Robann squealed.
Kendao turned a flaming red and starting pulling at his collar. Annya moaned and ran behind her father's back.
"Fathermake her stop!" she pleaded.
"Yes yesRobann dearwe need to go nowno time to be planning anythingnow.yesgo" Obi-Wan mumbled incoherently.
Robann finally stopped chattering and the group moved on towards the bridge. Elleim hurried alongside Kendao and nudged him.
"Ohhh, Kendao is reddo! Wait until I tell Chye!"
Kendao just kicked her.

Jaren huffed and puffed through the air shafts, trying to find a way to get out. Ttocs was still behind, and catching up.
"By now, that lady would have notified Darth Vader breath and everyone else! I'm done for" Jaren thought. He turned left and skidded across another air shaft.
"Stop! Pleasemy lungs are about to burst!" Ttocs yelled. "It's no fair! I'm not fit to chase a kid through these things!"
"Too bad!" Jaren went even faster. He could hear Ttocs groaning and breathing really hard. Suddenly, a beeping sound went on inside the air shaft.
"What the" Jaren looked around him. He heard Ttocs gasp.
"Oh no! They're letting in" he didn't get to finish his sentence. A huge blast of air came out of nowhere. The air was so strong that it threw Jaren back into Ttocs and blew the both of them through another series of shafts.
"AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! AHHHHHHHHH<gasp> AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" both of them screamed. Then it stopped.
"Whewthat was close" Ttocs said. Then the floor beneath them gave away.
"AHHHHHHHHH!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!"
"OW MY BACK!!" Ttocs and Jaren found themselves in a hallway, lying on top of someone.
"Helpme" It was Luke. He had literally been smashed into the metal floor.
"Heythanks Luke boy! You stopped me from breaking any bones!" Jaren said cheerfully.
"Uhhhhh" he moaned.
"Great, now this wimp can't move. Smooth Jaren, smooth," Leia complained. Jaren flashed her a devilish smile.
"Say, Leia, looking nice and wet. What happened? These guys were slobbering all over you?" Jaren said, referring to Luke and Han.
"Shut up. I can't wait to get back to the base and get rid of all of you," she said. "C'mon, we've got to get back to the ship and get off this giant 'moon'."
The group turned and headed down the hallway. But before they could get three feet away, a loud thud sounded behind them. Instantly, the rather large group (with Ttocs now in Force-Proof cuffs) spun around to face their visitor.
"MOM!" cried Jaren.
"Jaren!" said Beanie. Beanie ran over and hugged him. She released him from her grasp then took a step back and whacked him upside the head. "How on earth did you get involved in this? Why aren't you back on the Tantive IV with Leia? How did you get off the ship? How--"
Leia interrupted at that point. "Aunt Beanie, woo hooo, over here!" said Leia.
Beanie turned to see Leia. Her face contorted into a look of confusion.
"C'mon, Mom," said Jaren, "We'll explain on the way, but we've gotta get going." The group turned and began jogging down the hall, not noticing that Luke was still standing there.
"I've gotta go tell Old Ben all that's happened!" said Luke aloud, not realizing that the group couldn't hear them, because they were already too far away. Luke turned and ran the other way.

On the other side of the Death Star, Obi-Wan's group was moving stealthily through the ship.
"Mr. Obi-Wan, sir!" cried Elleim from the back of the group, "I'm tired!! Can't we rest? Please!?"
Obi-Wan spoke to Robann quickly and they whisked the group into a nearby antechamber. Elleim and Kendao collapsed onto the floor in exhaustion.
"Jedi children," thought Annya, "Ha! They have the endurance of a snail."
Elleim stuck her tongue out at Annya.
Robann pulled on Obi-Wan's cloak, dragging him over to the corner. She lowered her voice to a yelling whisper. "WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING HERE!?!"
"Robann, I....well, you see..."
"I told you no more missions. Even Annya should have stopped you, but seeing that you were the grown-up, you should have known better! I'm so disappointed in you Obi-Wan!"
"STOP IT!" he yelled.
Annya, Kendao, and Elleim's heads whipped around. They had never, ever heard Obi-Wan yell.
Obi-Wan's voice took on a whining tone. "I'm tired of you pushing me around. I know I may not be the smartest person in the world, but at least I try to--" He was rudely interrupted by Luke's sudden appearance.
"Luke?!?! What are you doing here?" said Obi-Wan.
"O there you are, Old Ben!"
"Obi-Wan, who is this kid?" asked Robann.
"It's Luke Skywalker," he replied. Robann's face looked blank. "You know, the kid on Tatooine..." He lowered his voice. "The last hope..."
Robann's face lit up. "OOOOOOOOO! And how did you get acquainted with him, Obi-Wan?"
"Old Ben's my hero!" proclaimed Luke.
Simultaneously, Annya and Robann looked at each other and started laughing hysterically.
"Ok, enough resting!" Obi-Wan decided. He dragged the capricious Robann and Annya into the hallway and returned to pull Kendao and Elleim back out. The group, now plus Luke, headed down the halls.

The other group was being led by Han and Chewie, even thought they had no idea where they were going. Finally, they relented and let Ttocs guide them (which in of itself was a stupid idea...). They turned a corner and ran into Chye.
"CHYE!" cried Ttocs, still in his Force-Proof cuffs, "Save me!"
"Huh?" said Chye. "Oh, hi Jaren! What's up?" he asked.
Beanie, who had put herself in charge, slapped another pair of Force-Proof cuffs on Chye. "C'mon!" said Beanie. "Keep going!" They continued down the halls.
"Let's take a little breather," said Han, trying not to sound winded.
"All right," said Leia, "But let's stay right here, no anterooms or anything."
Han slumped to the ground, wheezing heavily.

"Shhh! I thought I heard something!" said Robann.
"Wha?" said Obi-Wan. "I couldn't hear you."
"Oh do be quiet," said Robann. "Listen, there it is again."
The group leaned in and listened.
"Oh I hear it too!" said Annya.
"Let's go...quietly," said Obi-Wan. Robann nodded to the rest of the group and they stole down the hall, hugging the wall, walking one by one. Obi-Wan instantly took the lead, leaving Robann to take up the end.
Obi-Wan came to a corner and signaled the group to stop. He turned and whispered something to Elleim, who whispered it to Annya, who whispered it to Kendao, who whispered it to Luke, who told Robann.
"Ear's a barge pope of deeple, insidious a remail incursion of duke. Bear's also a ferdon who books dike a mary told Kristini," Luke relayed.
Robann raised an eyebrow. "Now did I just hear that wrong, or did Luke totally bungle the message?" she thought to herself.
"It was Luke!" came Elleim's voice.
"Oh, ok." Robann relayed forward to have the message repeated back. Eventually, the message made it's way back to Luke again.
"Now Luke, are you positive you know what it is this time?" asked Robann.
"Yup. There's a large group of people, including a female version of Luke--HEY!" said Luke. Obi-Wan gestured for him to keep talking. "There's also a person who looks like a very old Beanie. What's a Beanie?"
"Keep going Luke," said Robann.
"There's a Jaren there too, and they have two people in Force-Proof cuffs," finished Luke.
Robann whispered a reply, and Luke told Kendao, who told Annya, who told Elleim, who told Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan nodded and mouthed "Infiltrate!" Robann shook her head and calmly walked up with the rest of the group.
"Robann!" said Beanie.
"Beanie!" said Obi-Wan.
"Obi-Wan!" said Leia.
"Leia!" said Luke.
"Luke!" said Han.
"Do shut up," said Annya.
"Yeahshut up!" Chye repeated. Annya glared at him and he closed his mouth meekly.
"Wowwe're all together. Now we're just missing" Beanie began to say. Suddenly, the group heard a pair of footsteps running down the hallway.
"Oh, oh, its my mommy!! MOMMY!" Elleim shrieked. The footsteps came closer and Aciré came running into the room, blaster drawn.
"Elleim! Chye!! AHHH! Robann! Beanie!! Ttocs! Obi-"
"SHUT UP!" the group yelled. Aciré smiled sheepishly, then became serious.
"What is going on? Why are we all here again?" she demanded. Robann opened her mouth, but Annya cut her off. "It's a long storylet's go get some tea."
Five minutes later, the group ended up in Aciré's temporary quarters. The adults were all seated at the dining room table, sipping tea and coffee while the kids (including Luke) were playing in the other room.
"And like I was saying, Obi-Wan decided to not wear the dark navy blue suit that I had put out for him. It was so nice, with the silk necktie and dashing gold pocket watch! But noooo, he decided that he just had to wear the bright red plush velvet suit with a frilly white dress shirt underneath!! And he showed up to the restaurant wearing that! At the Coruscant Twilight Restaurant! For his daughter's 16th birthday!" Robann cried out. Beanie, Leia, and Aciré nodded understandably. Han and Chewie, who were playing poker at the other end of the table, nodded in agreement. Ttocs took the moment to hit Obi-Wan on the head.
"OW! What was that for?" he asked, rubbing his head.
"That was for being stupid. I told you so many times, you wear clothes to please others, not yourself!" Ttocs scolded.
"I thought it was that I was supposed to wear clothes to please myself?" Obi-Wan asked.
"In your case, no."
"But I looked so smashing in my outfit! Nobody else was wearing that authentic outfit! I looked groovy baby!" Obi-Wan cried in protest.
"Just shut up."

In the other room, Chye and Luke were playing "Star Ship Race 2000675" on Chye's Imperial PlayStation. Chye expertly drove his spaceship
around the race track. Luke was still trying to figure out how to work the buttons.
"Let's see, the red button makes my car jumpnoor was it this?" Luke pondered. His car just went in circles. Elleim sighed loudly.
"Give it up Luke. You're already 14 laps behind. Face it. You're a pathetic loser."
"No I'm not!! I'm going to save the universe some day, just you wait and see! Then we'll see who's the wimpy loser!" Luke taunted.
"Won again Luke," Chye announced.
Luke threw down the joystick and burst into tears. "No fair!!!!! I always lose!!!"
Elleim sighed in disgust and walked over to where Kendao and Annya were sitting. They had been staring at each other again without saying a word.
"Look, say something you guys. Gosh, am I the only sensible human being in this room who has an IQ of 1600?" Elleim complained. She looked around her. "Yup, I guess so."
Kendao cleared his throat. "UhI'm single. How about you?"
"Yeah, me too!" Annya replied. Elleim scowled and threw her hands up in the air.
"Morons, complete morons!" She walked over to the other room and went to go sit on her mom's lap.
"Mommy, everyone in that room is stupid," she complained.
"Ha, no kidding. With Luke in there, the world is doomed," Leia said gloomy.
Robann patted Elleim's hand reassuringly. "Don't you worry. My Annya is smart and beautiful. She won't be acting stupid."
Elleim gave Robann an incredulous look. "Wanna bet? She and Kendao have been staring at each other for the past five minutes! All they could say was that they were single!"
Robann let out a happy sigh. Ttocs' head jerked up.
"Whawhat?" he stammered.
"Oh, they're so cute together!!" Robann cooed.
"WHAT?!! Kendao likes someone! Oh no nononono. I haven't taught him all that he needs to know!! NononoI forbid this nonsenseI can't stand to think my little boy is growing up!"
"Nonono, I think it's cute. Let it be," Robann replied. Ttocs glared at Robann.
"Are you challenging me? Nononononono. My son will not be seeing your daughter. And that's that girlfriend!" Ttocs snapped his fingers.
"Oh really" Robann narrowed her eyebrows. Obi-Wan nervously twiddled his thumbs together. Aciré and Elleim looked away. Leia was looking at Chewie's cards. Han was swearing. Beanie looked around.
"Hey, where's Jaren?" At that moment, screaming came from the other room.
"JAREN!!! GIVE THAT BACK!!!" Annya screamed. Jaren came running into the room with something in his hand. Annya came racing after him, her face as red as a pepper.
Jaren ran around the table, passing his mother. Beanie expertly grabbed him, pried open his hand and took the object away.
"Ahhhh, it's a computer generated picture of Annya and Kendao, kissing beneath the Millennium Falcon. And ahhh, Annya's hair is burnt to a crisp and Kendao's has smoke all over his face. Jaren, you're such a good artist!" his mother cooed.
Before Ttocs and Robann could respond, another shriek came from the other room. Chye came in, crying loudly. Luke came in also, bawling as well.
"MOMMY! That stupid jerk broke my Imperial PlayStation!! And he refuses to get me a new one!" Chye wailed.
"It's not my fault!! He kept cheating!!!!" Luke cried.
"And how did he cheat?" Beanie asked.
"He didn't show me how to use the joystick!!!" Luke blubbered out. Everyone stared at him.
"Oh how pathetic. Even I know how to use an Imperial PlayStation. Moron," Leia muttered.
Robann went over to Chye. "There there. You'll get a new Imperial Play-"
"No he will not!" Obi-Wan thundered. He went over to Luke and hugged him. "Poor Luke was robbed of his dignity! I for one shall not have him look stupid! Chye, say you're sorry!"
Chye just stuck his tongue out at Obi-Wan and ran over to his mom. Obi-Wan's face darkened.
"Wellbe that way. Good side of the force, let's leave and continue our journey."
Leia, Luke, Han, Chewie, Beanie, Jaren, Annya, and Robann started walking out the door. Aciré nudged Ttocs.
"Oh, oh yeahwhat was itand be that way too, for Kendao shall not associated with Annya!" Ttocs announced. Robann glared back.
"This means war" she said.
"Woo-hoo! Dark versus goody goodys! Let's fight!" Elleim cried out enthusiastically.
"Not yetwe'll give them 3 minutes, then we'll go after them," Aciré said knowingly. "Else, it won't be fun."

The "Light Side" group took off running. Since Robann, Obi-Wan, Beanie were all Jedi, they went into the infamous Force run, leaving Leia, Luke, Annya, Jaren, Han and Chewie far behind. They scouted out the area and waited for the others to catch up. Pretty soon, Luke was panting and straggling far behind the group.
"Wait," he wheezed, "I can't keep up!"
The others ignored him and kept going. Finally, Luke came to a stop and stood and panted for a few minutes. After a moment, he noticed that Leia, Annya, Jaren, Han and Chewie were coming back, all of them breathing pretty heavily too.
"We...<puff><wheeze> couldn't keep up with the <hack> Jedis," said Jaren slowly.
"They....were...going...to...go up....a....HUGE....staircase....We voted...no," said Han, barely coherent.
"All right!" said Luke, who had now recuperated, "I vote we go take the elevator!"
The others nodded and they headed off into the direction of the bright neon sign that read "Elevator".

"Can we go after them now, Mom?" whined Elleim.
"No," said Aciré shortly.
"Now?" asked Chye.
"NO," replied Aciré more sharply.
"Now?" asked Kendao.
"NO!" yelled Aciré.
"Now?" whined Ttocs.
"For the last freakin' time, NO!!!" cried Aciré. "Come now, we must tell Lord Vader about--"
"Tell Lord Vader what, apprentice?" thundered a sudden booming voice from the door. The clan's jaws all dropped open and they fell to their knees as per instructed.
"Your Vadership...." said Ttocs.
"What did you want to tell Lord Vader?" repeated Vader.
"Oh, just that Obi-Wan Kenobi is here," said Elleim.
Aciré reached over and whacked Elleim upside the head. "You know better. Let the grown-ups speak first!"
"Yeah, Elleim!" said Chye tauntingly. Elleim stuck out her tongue as Aciré whacked Chye upside the head too. Kendao was still staring at the floor with that glazed look on his face.
"Obi is here?" asked Vader.
"Yes, your Vadership. So is Robann--"
"Robann what?"
"Why, I believe she's Robann Ylad-Kenobi, your Vadership," said Ttocs.
"Robann married that goon who couldn't even dress appropriately?" asked Vader.
Chye, Elleim, and Kendao all looked at each other eagerly.
"Why," began Vader, "Vader remembers their first date..." he trailed off into a wistful voice. "Obi-Wan wanted to wear white leather pants and a red silk shirt with brown leather boots and a fake afro. And Qui-Gon and Ttocs were trying to convince him that a suit and tie was a much better game plan. But he wouldn't believe them. And--"
"Your Vadership, not in front of the children!" said Aciré sharply.
"OH yes. Sorry. Where has Obi-Wan got to?"
"He, Robann, Beanie, Annya, Jaren, Leia, Luke, Han and Chewie were last seen running down the hall," replied Ttocs.
"Let Vader find them!" declared Vader.
"Um, Mr. Vader, sir," said Chye tentatively, "According to the computers, their group has split up. Three of them are going up the "Great Staircase" to the bridge and the others are in the elevator."
"Oh, that's gotta be Obi-Wan on the staircase," said Ttocs, leaning over Chye's shoulder. "I can practically see the bad clothes sense through the computer."
"Vader agrees with you, Ttocs. You, Aciré, Chye, Elleim and Kendao will chase the group in the elevator. Vader will track down these....heeeee....ohhhhh....ehhhhhhhh....hoooooooo...Jedi!" Vader turned and strode out of the room.

The elevator glided to a stop. "Hangar Floor!" the voice called out cheerily. Annya, Jaren, Leia, Luke, Han and Chewie stepped out of the elevator.
"Ok!" said Leia, with the enthusiasm of a cheerleader, "Han, Chewie, you're with me. Annya, Jaren, Luke, go that way. Rendez-vous in front of the Falcon at oh-seven-hundred!" Leia finished with military formality. The two groups split up.

Back with Aciré, Ttocs, Chye, and Elleim, Kendao was lacking sadly behind. He glanced up front and made his decision. Deftly, he left the group and went running towards the Light Group.