Daniel: *walks on stage* Even though by now it is painfully obvious that this sort of thing is no longer original, and that the best is the original, I thought I would have a go. However, I do have to thank Hika, and my future wife Doodles (whose name is most certainly not Dora), for inspiring countless…*counts*…dozens to try their hand at this kind of pointless humor. Here’s another one. Let’s see how it goes…*walks off stage*
*lights dim, drumroll*
Voice: Live! From an unnamed and unimportant part of the Middle of Nowhere (also known as Utah), it’s…
Daniel and Danielle: THE…
*commercial*
Daniel: *hops around stage three times and collapses back in seat* There! Happy?
Danielle: It will have to do. Anyway, it’s time for our NEXT GUEST, Laughing Bull!
*applause, random people, who look EXTREMELY scared, drag out Laughing Bull*
Laughing Bull: It says ‘No Smoking’.
Danielle: BEFORE ANYTHING ELSE! What does that sign-hey. That’s right.
Laughing Bull: Now Daniel says, ‘Wow.’
Daniel: Wow. … o.O What the…
Laughing Bull: Now you both say, ‘…ok. WELCOME TO THE-’
Both: …ok. WELCOME TO THE-
*commercial*
Laughing Bull: I’m sorry, but it is true.
Danielle: *sob* I’m sorry, Daniel, I’m really sorry!
Daniel: o.o;; How many eggs will it lay?
Laughing Bull: You’re better off not knowing.
Daniel: But…this is my brain we’re talking about here!
Laughing Bull: *shrug*
Daniel: …well…LET’S GET ON WITH THE SHOW!
Danielle: *sniffle* Ok. Our first question come from…Sean. He asks-
Laughing Bull: ‘Why does Vicious have that stupid bird?’ O.O I REFUSE TO ANSWER THAT QUESTION! THAT VISION WAS-OH, GREAT SPIRIT! *faints*
Both: …alrighty then.
Daniel: *takes off sock and holds it under Bull’s nose*
Laughing Bull: *wakes up*
Daniel: Next batch of questions comes from-
Laughing Bull: Hikaness. She doesn’t know who I am.
Daniel: …Hikaness, who doesn’t know who Bull is. o.O She asks-
Laughing Bull: Three questions. *ducks* Ok, I’ll stop it.
Danielle: *tries to whack him but…he ducked* STOP DOING THAT! … o.O;;
Laughing Bull: ^_^
Daniel: ANYway, her first question is "Why is your name Laughing Bull? Are you a bull that laughs constantly or something? Because that's the aura you're giving off. I CAN SEE IT! IT'S BRIGHT PINK! I'm special too! *giggles*"
Laughing Bull: I got it from the side of a truck.
Both: …
Danielle: O…k. Her next question is "Did you know I have mental problems? I DO! It's hereditary. My cousins and my brothers have it too. My brothers sing Britney Spears!"
Laughing Bull: AH! BRITNEY! *collapses on floor in hysterics*
Daniel: SHE SPOKE THE NAME OF THE EVIL ONE! MY EARS ARE BLEEDING!
Danielle: *rolls eyes* Oh, come on.
Daniel: She meant the Spears woman.
Danielle: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!! *scurries into corner, rocks back and forth* Can’t sleep…gonna die…can’t sleep…clown going to eat me…can’t sleep…prunes slipped into drink…
Audience (Agnes): *walks up to each and slaps them*
Danielle: *recovers* Thank you Agnes.
Daniel: Her last question is "Can I hook you up with Marie Susan Scarlett Smith the Fourth? Do you even know who that is?"
Laughing Bull: Yes. I’m afraid she wouldn’t like me.
Daniel: How do you know?
Laughing Bull: I…know…EVERYTHING! *eyes glow, levitates off chair* MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
All: *cower in corner and try to fend him off with Agnes’ "Mental" flag*
Laughing Bull: *glides back to chair* ^_^ Next question please.
All: *throwing up hasty barrier made of furniture*
Danielle: Eria has three questions. First, "Are you the guy who has to be over 50 'cause he's really wrinkly with that sand continuously straining through his hands??"
Laughing Bull: Yes, I am the guy who has to be over 50 ‘cause I’m really wrinkly with that sand continuously straining through my hands.
Daniel: "If you are, WHY DID YOU PROPHESY SPIKE'S DEATH!?!? *her spirit tries to throttle him*"
Laughing Bull: *eyes glow* HISSSSSSSSSSS!
Eria’s spirit: Eep! *hides behind barrier*
Laughing Bull: I prophesied it because it was going to happen and Jet wanted to know.
Danielle: Ok. "If not, who are you?? *hee hee*"
Laughing Bull: I’m the guy who has to be over 50 ‘cause I’m really wrinkly with that sand continuously straining through my hands. But, I use anti-wrinkle cream. So imagine what I would look like if I let nature take its course!
All: *shudder*
Daniel: Kookie has one question. "HOW DARE YOU SAY "MY" GREN HAS A PATHETIC SOUL (you know that time when you told that lil' boy about that shooting star); GREN WAS BEAUTIFUL!!! HE DID NOT DESERVED TO DIE!!!!!!!"
Laughing Bull: I NEVER SAID HE DESERVED TO DIE! YOU LIIIIIIIIIIIIE! *hiss*
All: Eep! *hides behind barrier again*
Laughing Bull: Next question!
Danielle: Kate AKA Vampirezombiegirl has six questions. "WHO ARE YOU?!"
Laughing Bull: *goes all creepy-like* I am a QUEEN! And I shall not be dark but BEAUTIFUL and TERRIBLE as the Morning and the Night! FAIR AS THE SEA AND THE SUN AND THE SNOW UPON THE MOUNTAIN! DREADFUL AS THE STORM AND THE LIGHTNING! STRONGER THEN THE FOUNDATIONS OF THE EARTH! ALL SHALL LOVE ME AND DESPAIR!
All: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
Laughing Bull: *calms down* Er…I’m Laughing Bull, your ordinary Native American seer!
All: *frantically trying to tunnel through stage floor*
Daniel: "Do you like Bishies? ^_^"
Laughing Bull: *eyes light up* Bishies? I love bishies!
Danielle: o.O;;; "Laughing Bull want a cookie?"
Laughing Bull: Sure!
Daniel: Erm… we don’t have any.
Laughing: I. Want. A. COOKIE!!!
All: EEP!
Agnes: Fine! Take it! *throws cookie at Bull*
Laughing Bull: *catches it and eats it*
All: o.o;
Daniel: "*squints* Take off that darned mask! I KNOW you're Jet, come to save Spike!"
Laughing Bull: I am NOT!
Daniel: PLEASE DON’T EAT ME! *sob*
Laughing Bull: ^_^
Danielle: "Are YOU gonna be at Daniel and Doodles' wedding?"
Laughing Bull: Wedding?
Daniel: 0.0
Laughing Bull: Can I come to the wedding?
Daniel: Why me? *sob* WHY ME?! *sobsob* Yes, you can come.
Laughing Bull: Excellent!
Daniel: ;.; Kate’s last question is "Can I come to Daniel and Doodles' wedding? I wanna be the preacher! I CAN'T SKI!... So I'll say the stuff from a helicopter! ^_^ Or... I'll SLED down the hill! And I'll take pictures when Daniel runs into a tree! So can I come? Huh huh huh?" Um…sure! Are you a registered preacher? ‘Cause I want it to be nice and legal.
Laughing Bull: It’ll be the one of the few legal things you’ve done. *evil glint*
Daniel: … *sob*
Danielle: o.O;; RfB Radical Edward has the three final questions. "Do you ever get so stoned that you have mistaken that kid with a women?"
Laughing Bull: I never make mistakes.
Danielle: *cowers*
Daniel: "How old ARE you?"
Laughing Bull: WHAT?!
Daniel: AH! *jumps in hole*
Laughing Bull: How dare you!
Danielle: Um, um, um, LAST QUESTION! "Do you like to play playstation, considering there is one in your house thingy?"
Laughing Bull: *glare* I love my playstation. If anything were to happen to it, I would destroy a large amount of people.
Little Indian Kid (from sessions 12 and 13): *runs in* Bull! Bull! Your playstation got stolen!
Laughing Bull: O.O WHAT?! Who did this?!
Little Indian Kid: He looked Chinese!
Danielle: *whispers to Daniel* Not that Chinese dude from session 2…?
Laughing Bull: HE SHALL PAY! *runs out with Little Indian Kid*
All: *sigh of relief*
Daniel: *notices Eria’s spirit* Hey…what’re you still doing here?
Eria’s spirit: *sob* I couldn’t get out! HE WAS SO SCARY!
Danielle: There, there. It’s ok. *walks out with Agnes comforting Eria’s spirit*
Daniel: *looks around at largely destroyed stage* Hey! WHO’S GOING TO HELP ME CLEAN UP?
END.
A/N: Aiya…explanation? The first time I saw Laughing Bull, I remember thinking "SCARY OLD GUY! SCARY OLD GUY!"
Next up: Asimov. Ay, this is gonna be fun… :p
And a request please, questions only for the people specified for the next chapter! I won’t answer any questions for other characters! Last chapter was the ONLY exception I’m going to make! Sorry, but my vocal cords are still sore from yelling…*rubs throat*
Danielle: Wait! We’re not through yet!
Daniel: Huh?
Danielle: There’s a question for US!
Daniel: Really?
Danielle: Uh-huh. Tetsuo-Shima wants to know, "What planet are you from?"
Daniel: That’s easy! I’m from Earth!
Danielle: And I’m Daniel’s renegade left brain, and so, indirectly, I’m from Earth as well!
Both: See ya next time! Get your questions in, in, in!