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Funning the Doctors
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So I stumble into the emergency room and I'm like covered in blood. I crash myself into the nurses desk and am all "Gahh...Someone...Hel..." And then I collapse on the floor and vibrate myself. These nurses all crowd around and start examining me and I'm all fake gaggle gurgling and spitting up and stuff. They're all ordering, "500cc's of whatever blah blah stat!" and "Code Blue!" Inside I'm laughing myself silly at their panic ritual, but outside I'm acting like I'm practically unconsciousized. I feel myself being lifted off the floor and plopped down on the gurney thing and being like wheeled somewhere.
I open my eyes all wild and am like, "Am I gonna die?!?! Oh God! The
blood... OHHH....GOOODDD!!!" The doctor is like cutting my clothes off and
asking me what happened. So I start thrashing around like the convulsion fairy
just paid me a visit special- and so in reaction to that, they are all shooting
me up with some junk to make me simmer down. I feel the chemicals coursing
through my veins and the doctor man stares at me in the face- and is like,
"Sir...We can't find a wound... we can't find where you're
bleeding...sir... do you remember what happened...?" I pretend I'm all
gasp gasp and them spit out,"It's....it's not muh...muh.. my
blood..." And then I act all collapsible unconscious again and up roll up
my eyes white in my head- then let my tongue hang out all loll loll. I hear the
doctor turn to a nurse and say, "Did he say it wasn't his blood?"
She's all serious, "Yes doctor...I think so..." I pop my eyes open
wide, sit straight upright and scream, "BLOOD OF OTHERS!" and then
flop down out fake cold again. I hear the doctors ask for restraints and 50cc's
of gloop. The nurse is all grabby with my arm ready to stick me when I grab
back at her wrist and take the needle out of her hand and then up jam it into
the doctors neck. Everyone is screaming and looking all wow wow as unreality
lands on their faces and stretches on tight. I push down the plunger and fill
him up with the goodie liquid. He falls back crash clatter into the tray of
instruments clawing at his neck with his eyes bugging. All the nurses and docs
gather around him and try to like help him out of his bodily trauma. So during
their distraction, I hop down off the table, push through a couple of stooges,
clamor through the waiting room and speed out through the front door leaving
the hollers of "Stop!" and "Get that guy!" behind me. God
graces sunshined on me again as I opened the passenger door to a parked
ambulance and saw the keys twinkly inside. The engine roared to life, the siren
wailed, and I sped off with faith in my heart that I can turn this glistening
clean health machine into a blood splattered death mobile covered with man made
dents.
zifdom