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LOST Wife and Dog, Reward for Dog

Did you hear about the blonde who tripped over her cordless phone?

Life's too short to dance with ugly men

I'm so gothic that I'm dead

I may be fat but you're ugly and I can lose weight

My other wife is beautiful

The weather is here wish you were beautiful

Never fight ugly people they have nothing to lose

Beauty is only skin-deep is something that ugly people say to make themselves feel better

You are proof that god has a sense of humor

You look like shit, is that the style now?

Horn broken, watch for finger

Grow your own dope, plant a man

How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? Nobody knows, it's never happened

I wasn't born a bitch, men just made me this way

If men had periods, they would brag about their size of tampons...

You say bitch like it's a bad thing?

I'm not a bitch, I'm the bitch

I believe in dragons, good men and other fantasy creatures

Redeo boys make lousy lovers, they think 8 seconds is a long ride

P.I.G. Pride Integrity Guts

You're a naughty boy! Go to MY room!

I'm the reason men are scared of women!

If a man says something in the woods and there's no-one to hear it...is he still wrong?

Women are only good for 2 things...and some can't even clean a house that well...

Good girls are bad girls that never got caught!

Guys are great! Every girl should own one!

I have PMS and a loaded gun...did u have something to say?

Don't compare men to dogs...it isn't fair on the dogs

God made oceans, god made lakes, god made men..hey, we all make mistakes
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