Little Brother in the Manchester Stylee


Having seen the wonder that is the beginning of the social experiment of Big Brother. It was decided that a similar experiment would be set up in Manchester, using an amalgamation of several houses in the Fallowfield area featuring former members of Dalton-Ellis Hall. The contestants would feature six males and females, all had passed strict tests about their personality, general attitude towards others and checks on their criminal records. All passed except one, who had been involved in a wide scale robbery of gold bars throughout his life. However after further consideration the contestant (who wont be named to prevent bias) was allowed to continue in the Little Brother program. The twelve contestants are

Brian Feltham - From various parts of the world depending on which villa he had stayed in last. The resident toff cited one of the reasons for him to apply to the program was the idea of watching everyone on the toilet and in the shower via the CCTV cameras. Unfortunately for Brian it wasn't explained to him until later, that he would be subjected To and not part OF the viewing experience that is Little Brother.

Tom O'Brien - Taking time out of his boyband, Preston born and bred Tom decided that being a part of Little Brother would allow him free publicity to further enhance his band FIST and their forthcoming hit "Get Fisted". This led to him having "GET FISTED" tattooed around his bottom.

Jay Chirinos - Taking part in Little Brother will give this self proclaimed "film buff" from Blackpool an insight into his latest script idea. Following the flop that was "This Is Not A Joke", Jay hopes that his latest script (as yet untitled) about a team of security guards watching various people having "slash's" in the local toilets on security cameras before meeting their doppelgangers will fare better.

Alex Bell - This part time "security" guard from Middlesbrough with a self proclaimed Ass fetish. Hopes that by joining Little Brother will allow him to pursue his favourite hobby of getting pissed and annoying everyone before being sick. However an impending month long visit to Morocco with his girlfriend could curtail Alex's attempts to win Little Brother.

Tom Brown - aka Shrew. This Londoner has two main reasons for joining the Little Brother experiment. Firstly after a disgusting one night stand with a stranger, "Shrew" has now gone into hiding from the aforementioned stranger to avoid both a maternity test and beatings from the girls family. His second reason for escaping the outside world is so he can concentrate on the dance anthem of "Dancin and Trancin" so it will be ready to hit the shops just in time for Christmas.

Neil Jones - This black wannabe from the fictional town of Mansfield. Neil hopes that by winning Little Brother he will finally put Mansfield firmly on the map and dispel rumours that it is part of the fictional world of Narnia. Neil is also confident of being successful in the competition via the virtue of being "black". He is quoted as saying " if I have to play the race card to win, then so be it"

Vicky Hinchcliffe - This no nonsense lass from Gummersall (Where??? I thought Mansfield was made up! - Tom) is there to provide entertainment to the rest of the group. Being a keen karioke singer, Vicky hopes that by emerging victorious from Little Brother will allow her a singing career in much the same vein as "The Cruise's" Jane McDonald.

Helen Alexander - This future doctor from the Wirrell believes that dancing is the way to win over the Little Brother viewers. "When they see me dance, it'll be all over for the rest of them" quips the Scouse lass before dancing away to another "TUNE"

Ruth Burns - "If anyone expects to see Ruth dressed before 9pm forget it" a close member of Ruth's family reveals to the Little Brother team. The lively lady from Wolverhampton is using sleep as the key to win. "if they can't see me, they can't vote me out" she says. Ruth also believes that Terry Venebles is a bad man and that Danny Wilson is THE man for any job.

Andrea Duffell - Andrea is also a great believer in the sleeping your way to victory. When not in bed, Andrea is most often seen "Tooting" it up or conversing to several "friends" on her mobile phone.

Jo Dimitros - The final participant in the Little Brother experiment, Jo believes that Jack Daniels will be her way of escaping the pressure's of Little Brother. "Just give it me with diet coke and no ice and I'm happy". Similarly her departure to Morocco for a month is likely to hamper her chances of winning Little Brother.

The twelve competitors were ushered into a specially made house and the door locked behind them. This was to be their home and prison for the next twelve weeks. Each week a member of the group would be voted out of the house. The remaining competitor after the twelve weeks would be crowned Little Brother champion of the millennium, with the rewards and benefits that go with it. Stay tuned for this unlikely groups first days in Little brother.

If you'd like to contact the Little Brother, send an e-mail to [email protected]

He's also the person to speak to if you're from Channel 4 and you'd like to discuss the rights to this format. And on that note, a big thanks to Neil 'Neeraj' Jones for his time and/or effort.

Ok time to go back to the menu