William Barker July 30, 1949 � March 4, 2009

Deep wet moss and cool blue shadows

Beneath a bending fir,

And the purple solitude of mountains,

When only the dark owls stir-

Oh, there will come a day, twilight,

When I shall sink to rest

In deep wet moss and cool blue shadows

Upon a mountain�s breast,

And yield a body torn with passions,

And bruised with earthly scars,

To the cool oblivion of evening,

Of solitude and stars. � Lew Sarett

Good Afternoon and Welcome, to the Memorial Service for William Barker. My name is Oberon and I have been asked by the family to officiate this service for Bill�s family, friends and community. Bill was a good husband and father, son and brother, uncle, grandfather and perhaps other family relationships. And he was also a good friend to many people. A friendly and kind soul, who we now remember.

How many times have you heard, or yourself said, �She�s closer to me than my own sister, � or, �He�s just like family?� Friends are the first people with whom we have a relationship after our parents and siblings, and those early beginnings often bring years of intimacy and shared joy. The person you call to tell about adolescent injustices or the letter of acceptance from college, the buddy you spend every Super Bowl Sunday with even if he lives halfway across the country, the only person who really understands your inner longings, wild moments and quiet agonies. Friends make life a reasonable place. To some of us, the closeness we feel with a special friend is unmatched by any other relationship, and may endure longer.

Although I had not seen Big Bill for several years, I have known him since around 2001, when he began attending a local �chat night at the old Something�s Brewin� coffee shop in Southgate. Even with the uncertainty of those years, our Thursday night coffee get-togethers were a fun and unique way to meet many kindred souls. Bill was one of the first new friends I met, along with his daughter Crystal, and he always made newcomers feel very welcome.

There were many things I did not know about Bill, like for example, he was born in Arizona, but his parents divorced when he was young and his mother, Judy, moved Bill and two other siblings, Becky and Jerry, to the Detroit area, where eventually she married Craig. He gained two other siblings, Heather and Craig E. But Bill kept in touch with his biological father, aka Daddy Dave, and for his High School Prom, was flown out to the Southwest with his date to have dinner with his father. His father was a career Air Force man and also arranged for Bill and his date to fly back home, but continuing west, all the way around the world, in what must have been pretty unforgettable Prom package!

I�d like to think that some of those experiences helped shape Bill. He always seemed very comfortable in any setting, a true Man of the World.

But other experiences shaped Bill too. Many of those experiences came from the family life he shared with his wife Lori and their children Shawn and Crystal.

If flying around the world on his prom night was a one of a kind experience, than so too was the whirlwind romance, as Lori likes to put it, that was their meeting, courtship and marriage.

Bill met Lori a week before Halloween in 1975, through their roommates who apparantlly wanted to play �matchmaker�. It was its own kind of love at first sight; they dated exclusively and married a year some later. In addition to their daughter, Crystal, Bill wanted to be a good father to Shawn, the son from Lori�s previous relationship.

Like most men, Bill was a good worker. He worked for 26 years with Michigan Bell; into the time it became Ameritech. He also has been a courier, and even sold vacuum cleaners. Perhaps his employers saw something special in Bill, too, for during his stint with the phone company he once was part of a specially selected team that worked in Alaska after a disaster happened and his skills would be very useful. Later he received CIA clearance when his work involved a Presidential visit to Detroit. As he was loyal to friends, he was also trusted with sensitive and secure situations in his work life.

Bill tried to enter military service but was not cleared for that, he had no regrets, so he tried to find other things to do, other ways to bring value and service to people.

And together with Lori, they raised their children. They also raised dogs, including Penny, Kyacha, and of course Cocoa, Bill�s absolute favorite dog. Bill really loved that dog. He liked eating, we all knew that. He liked to go to Greektown once in a while, that was a special treat. He liked being in the outdoors. More on that later.

He whom we love and lose

Is no longer where he was before.

He is now wherever we are.

(St. John Chrysostom, slightly altered)

Bill was like that as I knew him too. He too wanted to be everywhere. A very friendly man, who always offered to help out around our coffee shop meetings, and was an enthusiastic and loyal supporter of most of our other community events. Bill loved and enjoyed the outdoors all his life. There were camping trips to New Hampshire, to see the magnificent color changes of Fall, and probably some great trips with the Father / Son group Indian Guides that he attended with Shawn. In more recent years he loved camping at Paradise Pines, a private campgrounds near Port Huron, but even just a day visit was a real pleasure for Bill.

Bill leaves behind many friends and relatives. His father Craig and mother Judy and brothers and sisters. His wife and children. Daughter Crystal along with her husband Justin are the parents of his darling granddaughter, Adriana. And I understand that Shawn and his wife in Japan also expect a child soon, not quite a month before what would have been Bill�s 60th birthday.

So while we mourn for our memories and affection for Bill, we also would like to show support and love for these folks he left behind. May we all remember Bill.

I�d like to have everyone�s help with this reading. It�s a call and a response and its very simple. The response to each line is: �We will remember him�.

In the rising of the sun and in its going down

We will remember him

In the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter

We will remember him

In the opening of buds and in the rebirth of spring

We will remember him

In the blueness of the sky and in the warmth of summer

We will remember him

In the rustling of leaves and in the beauty of autumn

We will remember him

In the beginning of the year and when it ends

We will remember him

When we are weary and in need of strength

We will remember him

When we are lost and sick at heart

We will remember him

When we have joys we yearn to share

We will remember him

So long as we live, HE too shall live,

for he is now a part of us, so

We will remember him

Thank you everyone for being here and supporting the family. Before I open up the podium for your thoughts, words and tributes for Bill and the family, I would like to leave you with the following poem by Joyce Grenfall.

If I should go before the rest of you

Break not a flower nor inscribe a stone

Nor when I�m gone speak in a Sunday voice

But be the usual voices that I have known.

Weep if you must,

Parting is hell,

But life goes on,

So sing as well.

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