Mr. Earnest West had been silent for several nights and I guess he had been deep in thought about something that was bothering him.
 

“You know something, neighbors,” he finally said, “I’ve got the smartest or the dumbest kid that ever lived. I just can’t make up my mind which.     Junior was seven last Tuesday and I was hoping he’d outgrow some of his meanness. When he was five he talked back to his mother --when I wasn’t around. When he didn’t get things he wanted he’d have a fit and bump his head on the floor or kick his feet in the air and act like a madman. I wanted to hit him on the head hard enough to knock some sense into him but Dolly wouldn’t let me lay a hand on him. I told her in no uncertain words that the bible says spare the rod and spoil the child. She told me several times I couldn’t spank him because he might be sick and what we needed to do is take him to the doctor in Machias,  you know the one I mean, the psychiatrist. Daisy told Dolly he works wonders with kids.

   I didn’t want to go all the way to Machias and I sure didn’t want to think my kid was sick in the head, but you know Dolly. Either I did what she said or I’d get the three C’s.” (cold food, cold shoulder, and cold bed). Some of the men snickered and some felt sorry for him. Many of them had suffered the same fate at least once in their life. 

   “Well, I gave in and took the brat over there and it was a waste of time and money. That dumb doctor told me to let my son have his own way all the time and soon he’d grow out of his childish ways. I did what the doctor said and in a couple weeks my son started getting better. 

   He was doing fine until last Tuesday. I was outside doing some hoeing in the garden when he came out. He stood there for a few minutes looking at the ground and then all of a sudden he started crying, kicking his legs and swinging his arms, and banging his head into the ground. I told him to hold on for a little bit and then I asked him what he wanted. He pointed to the biggest worm I had ever seen in my whole life so I bent over, picked 
it up, and passed it to him. He was silent for a little bit and then he started his shenanigans all over again. I got a little hot under the collar but I was trying hard not to get mad. When I asked him what his problem was now he told me he wanted to eat the worm. That didn’t seem like a very good idea to me but when I remembered what the doctor in Machias had told me I told him to go ahead; I wouldn’t stop him. 

   He started crying again so I asked him what the matter was now. He told me he wanted me to eat half of the worm first and he passed it to me. There was no way this side of the hot place that I was going to eat half that worm....until....I looked at the house and Dolly was watching us through the kitchen window. I bit the worm in half and swallowed it and I knew for sure I was going to die. That was the worst thing I had ever tasted in my life. 

   I thought he’d be happy now but instead he fell to the ground and was worse than before. As you can well imagine I was at the end of my patience now but I asked him again what was wrong. He told me I was the meanest daddy that had ever walked on the face of this earth. I asked him what made him think a thing like that and he gave me the dumbest answer I have ever heard. He told me he was mad at me because I had just eaten his half of the worm."