Harry Hatch was the youngest man of the old timers and he was still single. When Mr. Hatch was just a youngster he was given the nickname Handsome Harry and it struck with him all the way through school and into his adult life. He was the only older person we kids were allowed to call by a first name. For the last several months Handsome had been traveling back and forth all the way to East Machias to see his new girlfriend. In all the many years I have lived I don�t recall ever seen a homely Maine female. Some may not be as cute as some of the others but they were never homely and I guess that�s why when I was young I wanted to see the girl Handsome Harry was dating. According to his own words she would never make home coming queen....and probably wouldn�t even be allowed in the same building with her.

   �There are a lot of unusual things about my girlfriend,� he said one night, �but there always seemed to be something to take your eye off the negative things about her. For instance, you never notice her crossed, right, blue eye because her left one is artificial and made from glass that just sparkles.     You hardly noticed the small wart on her nose because the big one on her chin has a long, stiff, hair protruding out from it and is a real eye catcher. Her bottom lip is a little crooked but you hardly notice that because her pearly teeth are so beautiful; all four of them. When she walks her knees knocked together and made a little drum sound, and nobody notices she�s pigeon toed because she�s so skinny. I must say, in all truthfulness, the scar that runs the length of her left cheek does attract some attention, and the long hairs from her nose are hard to ignore if you miss the fact that she is losing her hair and is nearly bald.� I tried hard to envision what his girlfriend looked like and I didn�t care much for what my mind was conjuring up.

    �I guess we�ll get married pretty soon and I�ll move her here to South Lubec,� he said after a couple seconds of silence.

   �Whenever I go over to East Michias to see her I always take her some place nice...and for the life of me I can�t recall the number of times I�ve heard someone say, there goes a well matched pair.�

 Gramps told me one time that Mr. Hatch had a plaque in his house that he received for coming in first in a male ugly contest. It read:
   I�m not a great movie star.
   I�m not pretty, by far.
   My face I don�t mind it, 
   for I am behind it.
   The people in front get the jar.

   I don�t know who wrote that but it suited Handsome Harry to a T.