Stigmatized
            by Nymph Du Pave

            EPILOGUE:
            Out of Love

            "Lex Luthor was an amazing friend, someone that very few people ever truly knew."  Clark fought back the tears that threatened to deny Lex his moment of peace and rest.  He would not cry over Lex's body.  He'd promised himself and Lex this.  It wouldn't happen.

            He took a deep breath in and steadied his nerves.  "I really am not sure any words I could say could ever bring to life what Lex was to me.  If you knew him you had your own opinion and his lover standing here speaking words of love and devotion in front of a crowd can't change what you saw."  He straightened himself in pride.  He could do this.

            "Some people saw a bastard whose only motivation was greed," he began.  "Others saw a son in search of his father's hard-won fortune.  Many saw a rich, spoiled brat, used to getting what he wanted.  This is mostly what the tabloids shouted in headlines and sidebars.

            "Still, others saw him as a kind magnate, someone whose life of ease and riches didn't blind him to the existence of that pain in the lives of the less fortunate.  He gave to charities not only with his money, but with his time.  He trusted up-and-comers and proved himself far past the nepotistic ways many saw the Luthor family solely capable of."

            Clark looked to his mother, father and Lana, sitting close to his left.  Lana smiled sweetly in support and it was all he needed.  His parents and Lana loved him.  Lex still loved him.  He always would.

            "I saw a friend.  When I first met him Lex, was in need of a friend, someone to believe in him.  Someone to trust and to love him.  I lost him and then he came back to me.  Life was never easy for Lex, but he tried his best to make it as good as it got for those that he loved.  For those that he cared about."

            He swallowed and paused.  "And now he's gone.  The only person I'm sure I'll ever love like I loved him, and everything was so short and so perfect.  It all just seemed to fit.  He made me promise to go on with my life without him, to find my strengths and succeed in my purpose.  To devote my life to what seemed important and good.  And I'll do that."  Clark laughed softly to himself.  "He and my father seemed to teach me things along the same lines."  He smiled at Jonathon.  "They just never seemed to be able to see eye to eye."  When his father smiled back he felt warmth in his stomach.

            "There's a poem that I read awhile back."  He laughed softly.  "Something in one of Lex's many volumes and I felt it appropriate."

            Clark shut his eyes and pulled to him a picture of Lex in his mind.  He hadn't needed notes so far and he wouldn't for the next part.  The words seemed emblazoned on his sore heart.
 

            "I can't take the stars anymore,
            the loneliness has exceeded barter value.
            Sweet, bitter mourning no more,
            today it's just the validity of pain,
            and the silence I hear, that is overwhelming.

            "The sorrow has arrived at new depths,
            and the grief; they can't be reformed.
            For until I can recover from this moment,
            stop my heart and let it not beat,
            and pray for the end of the deadly silence.

            "I can't take the stars anymore,
            their brilliance abounds unrestrained.
            Loves live and die by the galaxy,
            I don't wish it to be my map henceforth.
            Maybe then the spiteful silence will stop."
 

            He looked over the crowd of hundreds and wondered why he thought his fear of public speaking was going to affect him here.  It just didn't fit.  This was about Lex, about his life and his death.  There was no place for fear.  Just celebration of a life and grief over a loss.

            He smiled at the cameras and people.  "Lex was told to do one thing and he'd do it… if it suited his purpose."  There were titters which was a better reaction than he'd expected.  "There were so many sides of Lex that, even after fifteen years as best friends, I was just discovering.  His most amazing was his strength and ability to beat the odds.  He did it in his business, with his friendships and finally with his life.  Doctors kept telling him he had very little time left.  He stopped seeing them shortly after coming back to me and lived another twelve years, eleven longer than the most extended expectations."

            He looked to the closed casket below him and to his right.  It was white and pristine and gorgeous.  It fit how Clark saw Lex's soul.

            "I think that's really what anyone can learn from him," he said.  "Fight for what you want, try your best to know yourself and believe in making your own destiny.  That's what he taught me."
 

            THE END