INDEPENDENT LOVE SONG

Chapter Eight: Sex Bomb

He couldn't breathe.  No air, no air, no oxygen and what did his brain need right now?

Cla-

The childhood fears were flashing through his brain.  No mother to help, where was she, why did she die, oh, dear god!  His voice was little in his brain and his body began to tremble and the life began to slip from his body.  Where was-

Clark.

Clark's lips were on his.  There was a flash of white light, he was at the bridge and there was Clark-

I know I hit him, I know I did, but why won't he just tell me the truth?

What was happening though?  The car plunged in and he could see: there was Clark, ripping the roof aside.  The swimming fast, pulling him out, cradling his head, putting his lips on Lex's and-

He gasped and sat up, board straight, his fingers ripping into Clark's turtleneck.  His face was wet, and the tears running down Clark's cheeks told him all he needed to know.  He grasped Clark to him hard, aware of Michael's presence but just not caring.  He pulled Clark's face awkwardly to his and kissed him, pulling more air into his lungs.

After a minute he felt safe and pulled away.  Michael was staring at him with worry lining his face heavily.  "Master Luthor, tell me that wasn't what I think that was."

Lex was utterly confused.  The asthma had ceased since the meteor showers.  He'd been healthy other than the drugs and his doctors and Toby…  They all told him that any normal human being would have died from the OD's he'd put his body through.  "Yeah, it was."

Michael stood and pushed the instant dial on his phone.  "Sam," he started, walking towards the car.

"What, Lex?  What was that?"

"An asthma attack."

Clark sat back and pulled Lex closer to him.  Lex turned, leaning up against Clark's chest.  He didn't care that they were on they floor; it was comfortable.  He also didn't care that it was in front Michael.  The man had taken things extremely well for someone who wasn't supposed to know anything.

Lex would have to talk with him soon.

"I have some things to tell you, Lex, but not here.  Not now."

"I understand," he said softly, and he did.

"But I can tell you this, because I'm about to give an ultimatum and I want you to understand that I can live up to it."

An ultimatum?

This was sure to be interesting.

Lex kept quiet.

"I'm strong, Lex, very strong.  I can protect you from a lot of things, almost everything.  So when I say this I want you to understand me."

"Okay."

"I want all of you or none of you."

The last part dug into his chest.  That Clark was even listing that as an option…

The green eyes bore deeply into his.  "I want you with me as much as possible, and I never want to leave your side if it's not imperative to do so."

Lex nuzzled his head under Clark's chin, staying silent.

"I can't risk you having another attack and my not being there."

"That's what inhalers are for."

"Or having your stupid-fuck-self driving around like some under-talented Mario Andretti."

That stung a little.  Stupid-fuck-self?  "I happen to like the way I drive."

"Luthor."

The depth and seriousness in Clark's tone was haunting and told Lex that this was so not the time to joke.

"I'm sorry.  I'll drive like a little old lady from now on."

"Lex!  I'm being serious."

He pushed away from Clark and turned around.  "So am I," he snapped.  "You want me to sell all of the sporty little cars I've got, the Lamborghini, the Vipers, the Spyder, the Porsches.  You want me to get rid of the motorcycles and- and buy a Dodge-fucking-Mini Van?  Fine!  I will!  You want me to start carrying around three tons of pills for various symptoms or maybe a medical team?  I will.  But I'm not going to stop bathing because you're afraid I might slip and fall.  I'm not going to stop eating because you're afraid I might choke.  Do you see what I mean?  Do you see what I'm getting at?"

Clark's voice was soft but firm.  "I'm in love with you, Alexander, and I don't get to chose how you go.  I don't want to lose you because you were stupid.  I won't  lose you to anyone or anything."

Lex stood up and walked to the limo.  He heard Clark behind him.

Alexander.  He'd never liked that name.  Never.  Not even his mother called him that.  He hated it.

Till now.

They got in the sleek, black car.  "I want you forever, too, Clark.  I need you in my life.  You're something that I never thought I'd find, something so rare for anyone really.  And for me of all people."  He breathed in.  "I was engaged once."

Clark nodded.  "To that British woman.  The redhead."

Lex was stunned.  "You…  You knew?"

Clark smiled at him like he was off his rocker but still really, well, cute.

I'm not cute, he thought randomly.

"It was in the papers and all over TV a while back.  I couldn't watch a show without seeing it on the news one week."

This was not the reaction he'd been expecting.  Hurt, maybe a little anger, but… humor?  "You're not upset?"

"It's not like you did this three days ago, Lex."  Clark bent down and retrieved them both a bottle of water from the mini-fridge.  "We didn't even know each other then."  He opened the Ty-Nant and took a long swallow.  Lex was tempted to lean forward and nibble on the exposed flesh.  It would certainly calm him.  At least for a while.  Then it would do other things to him.  To them.

"And you didn't love her or you'd still be together."

"Actually, I couldn't stand her," he said staring at the floor.  "But that's neither here nor there and very besides the point.  Not to mention an incredibly long story."  He paused watching Clark taking another swig.  He must have been thirsty.  "You don't-" he started, nervous and an instant burn in his stomach reminded him of an ulcer.  "You don't, like, want kids, do you?"

Clark choked on his water and Lex pounded his back for a minute.

"Jesus, Lex!  Where did that come from?"

Lex looked at the limousine floor.  "I was just think what a great father you'd make and I-"

Clark kissed him on the cheek.  "We'll adopt then."  He grinned wickedly.  "Mom."

"What?!"

+_+_+_+_+

It had taken a moment for him to realize that Clark was only kidding about adopting even though Clark had been laughing at Lex's intimidated expression.  When Clark had calmed he explained to Lex that he was only still a kid himself and that children and a house of his own were far, far off in the future.

The last thing Lex had ever thought of Clark as was a kid, not truly and utterly, and maybe that was why he was lucky enough to have him now.  Most people saw Clark as what they wanted to see; a dork, a little boy still growing up, unwise and unseeing to the world around him, clueless to the dangers that people [including a certain bald-headed heir] held deeply within.

Lex took what he saw at face value and he had a gift for reading faces.  Clark's- past the beauty- was astonishing.  He was one of the most horrible liars Lex knew, and at the same time he managed to convince everyone that he was just some quiet little farmboy from Middle Kansas.

Lex felt a squeeze and he looked down at his hand but Clark's fingers were already slipping out of his.  The two of them were entering yet another display at the MAAS Museum.  Thanks to the influence that all of the paying members of MAAS's exclusive little group exhibited, it wasn't really a tour but a 'wander-where-you-like-and-follow-if-you-want'.

Clark and he didn't want.

They'd already eaten after paying a short visit to one of the men's stores to buy Clark a new shirt.  A black, long-sleeved turtleneck.  Clingy and soft, like cotton had the sudden ability to imitate down feathers perfectly.

Lex didn't want to think about the fact that he had ripped and reshaped the other.  During the asthma attack.  What could not have been an asthma attack.

He heard Clark's gasp and followed the boy's eyes to a feature on Electromagnetic Radiation, Spectra and Spectroscopy.  He dutifully paused whilst his young lover took in the information.

At the dinner, the soft candlelight had played off of Clark's face, ridding it of anything that might have been seen as boyish features and replacing it with the smooth lines of early adulthood.  Lex had lost any appetite for comestibles, instead craving physical sustenance.  Not sex, necessarily, although, with Clark, he was finding himself suddenly inexhaustible, with copious amounts of craving to be fed.

No, he, in the low light with the soft music and exotic interstellar atmosphere was thinking about just touching Clark.  A little kiss on the lips, a brush of his fingers through the teen's hair; a silk that he could lose himself in forever.  He wanted to place his hand on top of Clark's and look meaningfully into those deep green eyes, the words 'I love you' playing on his mind and tickling the back of his throat.

But even removing his inexplicable fear of those words, his wants were something he could not yet do without exposing the boy, and something he could never do without the fear of jaunts, ridicule and misplaced hatred.

Sometimes Lex really hated people and their mass assumptions and their mass ignorance and their mass plain stupidity.  What did it matter what sex a person preferred, if it was love their heart was seeking there?

"Lex?"

The voice, soothing and dreamy, returned his mind to the now.  The now where they were in a dark corner alone.  No one around.  No one.

He grinned wickedly and squeezed Clark's right butt cheek.

"Hey!" Clark hissed.  "I thought you said no sex stuff while in the museum for the sake of the education of-"

"Your young and easily distracted mind," Lex finished for him, then looked up at the boy with innocent eyes.  "It wasn't sexual.  It was merely performing and inventory check."

Clark rolled his eyes and Lex put up his hands in yet another overdone show or innocuous intent.  "Honest!  I was just checking to make sure my ass was there."

Eyebrows up and Lex suddenly wanted to lick them.  That was one part of Clark he hadn't tasted.

"Your ass."

"Yes."

"Yours"

"Yuh-huh."

"I think that you're forgetting who it's attached to."

Lex shook his head.  "No, I'm not."

"It's attached to me, Lex.  It's my ass."

Lex smiled stupidly.  "Yes.  And you're mine."

Clark laughed a little.  "Yeah, yeah I am.  And you would be?"

Lex's smile was now less stupid more proud.  "Yours, of course."

"So does that make this mine?"  Clark's hand closed around Lex's crotch.

His eyes fluttered close.  "Hey," he whispered.

"Yeah."

"No sex stuff, remember?"

Clark shrugged and removed his hand.  "Inventory."

Lex breathed in.  Fair game.  And Clark had just won.  "Right," he grumbled and readjusted the front of his pants.

"Aren't you going to check mine?"

Lex looked into Clark's eyes, saw them dark and heavy.  "I don't think that checking that particular item in this particular establishment would be completely appropriate.  Or even semi-appropriate."

Clark grabbed his hand.  "I want you to.  I need you to."

"Oh, God."

Clark pressed Lex's hand to the front of his slacks.  Both gasped as Lex's fingers caressed the hardened length tenting the polyester material.

"Clark, you're so…"

"I know."  The voice was strangled and weak, almost sad sounding.  "You do this too me, Lex.  More and more, you're all I can think about.  All I can breathe, can taste.  You're becoming all I know."

Lex felt both the overwhelming urge to kiss Clark and the eerie sensation that they were not going to be alone for long.  He got the feeling that this was not the most befitting place for whatever Clark needed to say.

"Come on."  He grabbed Clark's hand and pulled him down the hall leading to the observatory containing a false telescope which showed, not the sky of Metropolis -- as it was far too bright for many, many miles on to be an adequate place for a telescope of that magnitude-- but instead was connected via the intranet to an observatory on some distant island.  Clark could probably tell him which with very few details as to the whereabouts.

He pulled Clark into another room just as he heard kids and exploding laughter coming from behind him.  Kids.  Parents.  Him feeling Clark up.

No.  That would not have been good.  For anyone.

"I just…  You're the only thing to me, Lex."

Lex looked back to Clark and saw the frustration in the kid's eyes, painted on his lover's face.

That frustration was familiar.

"I'm so selfish, Lex.  I just… I want you, you know.  I want you with me and nowhere else.  Ever.  I want you in my bed, in my arms, I never want to stop touching you and I don't know why I can't just let you know I love you and let that be it."

"Clark-"

"I guess it's out of fear.  Fear that I won't be good enough for you.  That you'll find something better out there and lose interest in me."

"God, never, Clark."

"You say that and you mean it, but you can't stop this aching fear that tells me that you're better than for me."

He grabbed the boy's face.  "I could never be luckier than if I amounted to even an iota of what you're worth in love."

Clark's haunted eyes met his.  "I want you to never be anywhere else, Lex.  Not just so that I can protect you, but so that I can have you and make sure that no one else can even try.  I want to own you, Lex."

Whoa.

For a flash, for an instant, he was back in his bedroom in the condo with Clark.  Clark sexy and asleep.  He was thinking about college, about the Kents feeling obligated to him so that Clark could never leave.

Clark's tears came down.  "I want you to… to hear this and tell me, tell me that you'll still want to make love to me after this."

He'd never seen such pain.

"I'd like to think that after you drowned and I saved you, after I brought you back to life…  I sometimes caught myself thinking, before we had sex, that you owed me your love.  In the darkest, worst parts of me, Lex, I thought that and I still do.  Not actively, but I know that it's still there.  Like I own you because I saved your life."

And that was it.  Lex understood.  Everything he had felt back in the room, everything he'd hated himself for.  Everything that he'd thought was just his Luthor side to the extreme.  It was just love.  Selfish, possessive, 'all mine and nobody else can touch it' love.  He'd still die for Clark.  Only for him, but he'd do it.  He'd give up anything, even his own life, to make sure that Clark would be happy and safe for the rest of his.

"And if you left me, I couldn't live a normal life after that. I just-"

He kissed the farmboy, his farmboy with all that dark hair and those green eyes and those godly lips.  "I'll never leave you, Clark."

"But you mean-"

"I'll.  Never.  Leave.  You."  He said it slow, clear and deliberate.  "No matter what.  Whether we have a fight, a disagreement.  Whether your father tries to shoot me in the ass with an Uzi-"

He was damned proud of the snort of laughter he got from Clark in a moment where humor seemed so far from reach.

"I don't care Clark.  You own me, and I own you.  We owe each other everything.  I need you and I love you and I'll always be there for…"

He trailed off, realizing what he had just said.

Clark stood there in shock.  Then a big, dumb grin shattered his intense expression and he stepped closer to Lex.  "You said-"

"I know."

"That you-"

"I know."

"Would take a shot to the ass with an Uzi."

Lex frowned.  "What?"

Clark just laughed and pulled the smaller man in close.  "I'm kidding.  God, that sounded great.  I could hear those words from you for the rest of our lives.  Lex, I don't mean to rush you or anything, but could you-"

"I love you," Lex whispered, astounded at how easy it was, at how amazingly potent and simple, revolutionary and plain that sentence was.  "I've only loved my mother, Clark.  Only you and my mother."  His grip tightened on Clark.  "And I swear to God, Clark, if you die on me, I'll fucking kill you."

Clark laughed.  "So, you're okay with me wanting to own you?"

Lex sighed.  "More than you'll ever know."

"But-"

"I want it, too, Clark.  I want to own you, every piece of skin, every string of hair, every body part."

"Really?"  The suggestive tone did not escape Lex's ears.

He kissed Clark under the chin.  "We'll just take it one day at a time, okay?"

"Okay."

Another kiss, this time to the side of Clark's neck.

"One kiss at a time."

"Can do."

"And go from there."

Clark cleared his throat.  "Can we go from there now, Lex?"

"Wha-"

A tongue was in his mouth and a hand was grabbing his crotch.  "I want you, Lex," Clark breathed against his lips.  "I'm so hard for you."

Lex felt his body flush.  The little bit of dirty talk was nice.

"I need you, Lex.  I need you to come for me and not in my mouth."  Clark unbuttoned the first three buttons of Lex's shirt.  "I want to make love again.  Tonight.  Soon."

"Sh-shit," he stuttered, unable to control his panting.  "As much as I want to, I don’t think I can go another round yet.  I heal fast, but not that fast.  We can do a lot of things, but after this morning I think I'm going to need to recuperate until tomorrow."

Clark licked Lex's exposed collarbone.  "Who said I'd be doing the fucking?"

His erection throbbed, jumped and he shut his eyes, preferring the black to the stars he'd seen.  It was no use; they followed him under cover.

"I want you to fuck me, Lex."

He whimpered and ground against Clark hard without even thinking.  It was all he could do not to throw the boy to the floor and ravage him right there.

"Please," Lex begged.  He didn't want to lose his self-control.

"On the floor," Clark continued, relentlessly.  "From behind."

Lex was making unintelligible sounds.

"Hard.  Make me scream your name, Lex.  Make me come while you pound me."

"Clark," he croaked.  "You're not ready."

"I am."  Clark's hand was massaging his cock, making it impossible to think.  "Do you hear what I'm saying, Lex?"

"Yuh-Yeah."  What was he?  Def?  There was a ringing in his ears, but he could still hear Clark.

"Can you do me now, Lex?  Now?"

Wait, wait.  He had to think.  He'd had a plan for this.  If Clark had wanted to make love, he'd had an idea, a previous desire.  But what was it?

"I need you, Lex."

What was it?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

To be continued...