1/6/03-1/12/03

Smackdown

INT. PROMO SET – NIGHT

Nykk is standing alone, holding a mic, and smiling.

Nykk: Good evening, everyone. In case you don’t know me, I’m Nykk, the Cruiserweight Champion and leader of the… (laughs) former leader of the PPV Squad. Now, I know that I have a lot of fans who are wondering about the things I said last week, and instead of wrestling tonight, I thought I would come back here and instead explain a few things to all of you, because I think you deserve to know what’s going on, the fans at home and of course the fans here in Tucson (pronounces it Tuck-son). So here goes: last week, I had an epiphany. After my friend Huh ambushed me in the middle of the ring, I made a decision. I know this will disappoint a lot you, but I’ve decided to quit wrestling. I’m sorry, I know there will be a lot you who love to watch me perform out there, but I’ve come to the conclusion that it just isn’t worth it anymore. So I’ve decided that it’s time for me to quit while I’m ahead. Enough damage has been done already. You see, wrestling… professional wrestling can be a cold business. I have to admit, I didn’t really know how cold it could be when I decided to become involved. I mean, you read things about the business, in magazines and on the Internet, but take it from someone who has lived it. As I’ve gone on, I’ve really come to despise what I do. When people ask me what I do for a living, and I tell them, “I’m a professional wrestler,” the look I would get… “Isn’t it all fake?” they would say, or, “Grown men rolling around in their underwear. That’s so gay.” I’ve not only come to hate what I do, but also hate the people I work with. And that’s a shame, because by and large, I’ve come to hate the PPV Squad, even though I still love them. And I began to be sorry that I ever dragged any of them into this abyss. I changed a lot since I’ve been in WWE, and not all of it for the better. The rest of my friends have changed too. I’ve seen them commit sins that they would never even have thought of before we became wrestlers, and I have to live with the fact… the fact that a bunch of well-intentioned people are now people that I personally loathe, and it’s all because of me. But it doesn’t have to be this way. I… I feel responsible for the way everything has turned out, and I just want it to be like it was again, like it was before we got into the business. Bill DeMott was right last week. I don’t belong here, and neither do any of you. Croooooow… Cynric… Huh… Cheesecake… Shadow… no, Jim… Mark… Nathan… Art… Jen… Dusty… Jay… I want you to put aside the differences you’ve had with me, and follow me one last time. I want you all to join me in retirement, before this business sees the end of you. I won’t quit until all of you join me in retirement. I feel responsible, and I want to help you, and… and… I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

He puts the mic down and walks off the set.

INT. ARENA – NIGHT

MATCH: The Pyro Twins vs. John Cena and B-2

John Cena and B-2’s theme hits and they make their way to the ring.

Cole: We’re set for some tag team action, right here on Smackdown. This match was set up last week, after B-2 and Cena attacked the Pyro Twins and then Cena rapped a challenge.

Tazz: I don’t know what the hell he was saying, Cole, but I guess that means there’s going to be a match right now.

The Pyro Twins’ theme hits and they make their way to the ring.

Cole: Jay Rowe and Dusty Schneble look very, very angry. Cena and B-2 better watch out.

Tazz: I wonder if they were watching and listening to what Nykk said earlier on.

Cole: I have no idea if they did, and who knows what’s running through the minds of the Pyro Twins? Nykk says that he’s going to quit wrestling, but can’t until the PPV Squad agrees to join him.

FINISH: Jay whips Cena into the ropes, but Cena reverses. Jay nails him with a spinning heel kick and then goes to the top rope, hitting a senton splash. He covers, but B-2 breaks up the count. Dusty comes in and hits B-2 with right hands. He tries a clothesline, but B-2 ducks and hits one of his own. As Jay gets up, B-2 runs across the ring and leaps onto the top rope, vaulting off with a clothesline. Jay ducks and B-2 nails Cena instead. Jay and Dusty clothesline him over the top rope and wait for Cena to get up. They hit Final Darkness, and Jay makes the cover for the three count.

Winners: The Pyro Twins at 4:32

Cole: The Pyro Twins are victorious, and it doesn’t look like they plan on going anywhere!

B-2 attacks Dusty from behind and throws him out of the ring. Dusty goes underneath the ring and gets a flame-thrower as B-2 pounds Jay with forearms. He bounces off the ropes, but Jay leapfrogs, and Dusty shoots flames right into B-2’s face. He goes down and covers his hands with his face, writhing in pain. Jay asks Dusty what he should do to Cena, and Dusty tosses him a candle lighter. Jay grins evilly and switches it on. He sets fire to Cena’s shorts, and Cena immediately takes them off and runs toward the back in his wrestling tights.

Cole: Oh my God! John Cena just took his pants off and is running for the showers!

Officials come down to the ring and throw a towel over B-2’s face and help him to the back.

Tazz: I don’t know, Cole. That was just a little unnecessary. The Pyro Twins may have seriously injured Cena and B-2.

Cole: You may be right, Tazz, but I’m sure the Pyro Twins will think of it as teaching Cena and B-2 a lesson.

INT. ARENA – NIGHT

MATCH: Huh and Cheesecake vs. Matt Hardy and Shannon Moore

Matt Hardy’s theme hits and he makes his way to the ring, along with Shannon Moore. This week’s Matt Facts are, “The desert gives Matt sunburn,” and, “Matt has seven varieties of cacti in his garden.”

Cole: Here come Matt Hardy and Shannon Moore, his new MFer as of last week.

Tazz: Yeah, thanks to Shannon, Matt gained a victory over Cynric.

Huh’s theme hits and he and Cheesecake make their way to the ring.

Cole: Huh returned with a vengeance last week, taking out Nykk, who attacked had attacked him weeks before. That seems to be what spawned Nykk’s little rant earlier on.

Tazz: I don’t know what’s going on in Nykk’s head, but Huh’s a fool if he thinks Nykk is just going to let things stand as they are.

FINISH: A brawl erupts and the ref gets knocked out. Huh hits Moore with a moonsault and then tells Cheesecake to go up and try one. Cheesecake climbs to the top turnbuckle, but Matt pushes him off and sends him to the floor. Huh grabs Matt from behind, but Matt kicks a leg back to give Huh a low blow. Matt hits the Side Effect and then goes up to show Huh how to really do a moonsault. However, Cynric runs out and crotches Matt on the top rope. Huh gets to his feet and hits Matt with an electric chair suplex from the second rope. He covers and the ref wakes up to make the three count.

Winners: Huh and Cheesecake at 4:23

Cole: Huh and Cheesecake get the win with a little assist from Cynric, paying Hardy and Moore back for last week.

Tazz: I think he just may have succeeded in making Matt Hardy mad, Cole.

Cynric taunts Matt from the ramp, along with Huh and Cheesecake. Matt is enraged, and starts beating up Shannon Moore when he gets to his feet.

Cole: What the hell did Shannon Moore do? Matt Hardy needs to get control of himself.

INT. ARENA – NIGHT

Edge has just beaten Jamie Noble when Team Angle runs out to attack him. They beat up on Edge, but Croooooow runs down with a chair. He hits Shelton Benjamin across the back and then swings it at Charlie Haas, but Haas ducks and lifts Croooooow in a military press. Edge kicks him in the midsection and Croooooow escapes and drops in position for a sunset flip. Instead, he hits Haas in the groin with the chair. As he doubles over in pain, Edge spears him and he rolls out of the ring. Edge’s theme plays and he and Croooooow shake hands.

Cole: It looks like Croooooow came out to repay Edge for helping him out last week.

Tazz: They just took down the big A-Train, but we also have the Royal Rumble coming up, and alliances will mean nothing at that point.

INT. BACKSTAGE – NIGHT

Edge and Croooooow come through the curtain and Nykk is waiting for them.

Nykk: Jim!

Croooooow: What do you want, Nykk?

Nykk: I want to know if you heard what I had to say earlier.

Croooooow: Yeah, I heard it.

Nykk: And…? So what’s your answer? Listen, I got you into this industry and I can get you out. All you have to do is follow me one last time and we can go home. I can get you away from all this.

Croooooow walks away without answering.

Nykk: Is that a yes? I knew you’d see it my way. Tell the rest of the Squad about it!

Edge taps him on the shoulder and Nykk turns to face him.

Edge: I want you to know that I also heard what you said earlier tonight, and I have to tell you that it’s the biggest crock of #$@% I’ve ever heard in my life. This business is tough, yes, but most of us learn to deal with it. Croooooow and the rest of the PPV Squad obviously have, but you seem to be cracking under the pressure. A word of advice, my friend… I will not stand idly by while you denounce the lifestyle of myself and everyone else who works here. If you want to leave, then leave. Spare us your garbage.

Nykk: And what exactly do you plan to do about it if I don’t stop?

Edge smiles.

Edge: It’s been a long time since we fought, Nykk. Remember what happened the last time we met?

He walks away.

Velocity

MATCH: Cynric vs. Nunzio

Cynric beats Nunzio by disqualification after Shannon Moore interferes. He takes Moore out after the match.