9/23/02-9/29/02

Raw

INT. ARENA – NIGHT

MATCH: The Pyro Twins vs. Steven Richards and Shawn Stasiak

The Pyro Twins’ theme hits and they make their way to the ring.

JR: We have entered the aftermath of Unforgiven here on Raw, and we’re starting things off tonight with Dusty Schneble and Jay Rowe, the Pyro Twins!

King: They look ready tonight, JR. Notice how they seem to scowl a lot more after what happened last night?

JR: Indeed, the Pyro Twins came so close to winning the tag team titles, but those belts are still held by the UnAmericans.

Steven Richards’s theme hits and he and Shawn Stasiak make their way to the ring.

JR: Speaking of rival factions, here come two of the Extremists, Steven Richards and Shawn Stasiak.

King: Their group hasn’t really been the same since their war with the PPV Squad over the summer. Maybe a win over the Pyro Twins could get them back on track.

FINISH: Dusty comes in and cleans house with right hands and clotheslines. He hits the Rope Burn on Stasiak, but Richards saves him from being pinned. Jay comes in, but the Extremists get the better of Jay and Dusty. They put the Pyro Twins in opposite corners and try to whip them into each other. Jay reverses the whip on Stasiak, and Dusty takes him out with a flying shoulder tackle. Richards tries a clothesline, but Dusty ducks and takes him down, setting him up for a slingshot into the corner where Jay’s standing. As Richards leaps into the corner, Jay lifts both feet into Richards’s face. The Pyro Twins then hit Final Darkness on Stasiak and Dusty covers for the pin.

Winners: The Pyro Twins at 4:02

JR: The Pyro Twins have beaten the Extremists, and though I’m sure they’re disappointed about their loss last night, this should help them regain some momentum.

King: Hey, whatever helps them take the titles away from the UnAmericans, I’m all for it!

INT. PPV SQUAD LOCKER ROOM – NIGHT

Nykk is shaking hands with Cynric as Croooooow looks on, and Shadow gives Trish a hug. Nykk is in a suit and Trish is in an evening gown.

Shadow: Congratulations, you two! I always thought that you two had some great chemistry together.

Trish: Thanks, Shadow.

Croooooow: So what are you going to do now?

Nykk: Well, tonight I’m exercising my right as Intercontinental Champion to take the night off, so I can take my girl out on our first date.

He puts his arm around Trish.

Nykk: As for the rest of Raw, I place all matters of PPV Squad importance in your hands, Croooooow, until the hour of my return.

Croooooow: Couldn’t you just say, “Croooooow! You’re in charge.”?

Nykk: No, I don’t think so. That’s not very entertaining. This cameraman doesn’t follow me around because he hasn’t got a home, you know.

Trish: I just want to say thanks for everything, guys. You’ve all really been there for me and Nykk over the past month.

Croooooow: Don’t mention it, Trish. The pleasure’s ours.

Nykk: Well, we’d better get going. Dinner reservations.

Nykk extends his arm to Trish and they leave the room.

Shadow: Bye! Have fun!

As soon as Trish and Nykk leave, the Pyro Twins enter and stand opposite Croooooow and Cynric. They stare at each other for a tense moment, and then Dusty offers his hand to Croooooow. They all shake hands with each other.

Dusty: Good match last night, guys. No hard feelings?

Croooooow: Not at all.

Jay: Neither of us captured the tag team titles, but we’ve still got each other’s friendship. That’s the important thing.

Cynric nods.

Cynric: I agree. That’s something the UnAmericans will never understand about us. No one can break us. We may go through some tense moments, but we rise out of it stronger and more unified than we were before. Just like America.

Croooooow: (snaps his fingers) That just gave me an idea. Why don’t we show the UnAmericans how together we really are? You guys up for another match?

Dusty: What do you have in mind?

Croooooow: I was thinking we should go to Bischoff and ask for an eight man tag against the UnAmericans right here tonight!

Jay: That sounds good, but I heard that the UnAmericans already have an eight man tag match tonight.

Croooooow: Against who?

INT. BACKSTAGE – NIGHT

Goldust is walking with Cheesecake.

Goldust: Cheesecake, you and I know each other very well. We may have had our differences in the past, but tonight for one night only, our combined brainpower will team up with the brawn of Booker T and Huh to go against all four UnAmericans. We must make this a night to remember. We must have a plan.

Cheesecake: Don’t worry about a thing, Goldie. I have th’ome great idea’th. Th’ince Lance Th’torm, Christian, William Regal and Te’th’t are th’o negative about America, we’ll turn the table’th on them and show them what the power of po’th’itivity can do!

Booker T and Huh walk in front of the camera.

Booker: First of all, I don’t think that positivity is even a word! Second, I will NOT put on any ridiculous outfit, up to and including a lumberjack’s! Tell ‘em, dawg.

Huh: Word.

Booker: That’s what I’m talkin’ about! You guys do your strategizin’, and me and H-Dawg will do the atomizin’! For one night only, PPV Squad, Book, Goldust, we bring the UnAmericans to their knees! Not once, not twice, three times, or even four! Five times for the Five Time, Five Time, Five Time, Five Time, Five Time WCW Champion!

He looks sternly at Huh.

Huh: Huh… oh! Word.

Booker: (to Cheesecake) Now can you dig that…

Cheesecake holds up a hand to stop him.

Cheesecake: Th’uckaaaaaaaaa!

Booker: Man, that was horrible. Let’s go.

Booker walks off camera, but quickly jumps back in.

Booker: Besides, it’s not th’ucka, it’s… suckaaaaaaaaaa!

Booker leaves and Huh and Cheesecake share a glance while Goldust rubs himself.

EXT. PARKING GARAGE – NIGHT

Nykk and Trish are walking to their car when Test stops in front of them.

Nykk: What the hell do you want?

Test: You know what I want, Nykk. I want that Intercontinental Title. But since you decided to take your skank out tonight instead of compete, I’m challenging you to a rematch next week on Raw!

Nykk: Suits me just fine.

Test: That’s good. Maybe you can win without cheating this time, but I doubt it.

Nykk: Excuse me?

Test: You heard me… you’re a cheater! You cheated in our match last night…

Nykk: You started it!

Test: What are you, three!? You’re a cheater.

Nykk: No, you’re a cheater.

Test: No, you’re a cheater.

Nykk: You are!

Test: You are!

Trish: Guys, guys! Can we do this some other time? Nykk and I have a date to go on, and don’t you have a match coming up, Test?

Nykk: You’re right, Trish. I’ll see you next week, Test.

He and Trish walk off camera.

Test: All right, then. Cheater.

Nykk: I know you are, but what am I?

Test: Damn!

INT. ARENA – NIGHT

MATCH: Booker T, Goldust, Cheesecake and Huh vs. The UnAmericans

The UnAmericans’ theme hits and they make their way to the ring.

JR: Did you just see that confrontation Nykk and Test had out in the parking garage?

King: Yeah, it was like being back in elementary school!

JR: Well, there will be nothing ‘elementary’ about their rematch next week. It should be as hard hitting as it was at Unforgiven, if not more.

Cheesecake’s theme hits and he makes his way out on the ramp, decked out in Canadian colors.

JR: What the hell is Cheesecake wearing?

King: Is that the Canadian maple leaf on his shirt? I didn’t know he was from Canada!

JR: He’s not.

Cheesecake produces a mic.

Cheesecake: Greeting’th, everyone! You know me a’th Chee’th’cake, but tonight I am the hearty and very healthy Corncake! You th’ee, UnAmerican’th, you shouldn’t be negative about our country. Three of you have a country all your own to call home that’th almost a’th good a’th the United Th’tates! You should be proud of your heritage, and with that in mind, tonight I pre’th’ent to you the gimmick that could have been!

Booker T’s theme hits and he makes his way out to stand by Cheesecake. He’s dressed normally, except that he’s wearing red and white tights instead of his usual black.

Cheesecake: From Houston, Canada… Yukon T!

Goldust’s theme hits and he makes his way to the ring, but instead of being in gold and black, he’s in red and white and has maple leafs painted all over his face and red hair.

Cheesecake: From Hollywood, Canada… CanaDust!

Huh’s theme hits and he comes out also decked in Canadian colors and has a frying pan strapped to his head.

Cheesecake: And la’th’t, but th’ertainly not lea’th’t… Canadian Bacon!

JR: Oh… my… God…

King: I can’t believe it! Booker, Goldust, Cheesecake and Huh have gone Canuck!

In the ring, Storm, Christian and Test are outraged. After a moment of conference, Cheesecake, Huh, Booker and Goldust rush the ring and the bell rings.

FINISH: A brawl erupts close to the finish, and Booker T moves out of the way as Lance Storm charges. Storm leaps and crotches himself on the second turnbuckle. Booker tags Goldust, who sets up Lance for Shattered Dreams. However, Test intercepts him with the big boot and gets the three count.

Winners: The UnAmericans at 5:34

JR: The UnAmericans triumph over the team of Huh, Booker T, Goldust and Cheesecake…

King: What’s that idiot doing?

Huh slides back in the ring and attacks Test. However, all four UnAmericans jump on him and beat him down. Cheesecake tries to come to his rescue, but he gets knocked out with brass knuckles, and Booker gets an Unprettier. They hold up Huh and he receives a running leg lariat from Lance, knocking him down. Test and Regal drag Huh out of the ring and back behind the curtain.

JR: What in the hell are they doing with Huh?

King: They’ve abducted him, JR!

JR: No. The UnAmericans wouldn’t be that stupid, would they?

INT. PPV SQUAD LOCKER ROOM – NIGHT

Cheesecake rushes in and Croooooow and Cynric are talking to Shadow.

Cheesecake: Huh’s been kidnapped!

Croooooow stands up.

Croooooow: What!?

Cynric: Is this some kind of joke?

Cheesecake: Weren’t you watching the match? The UnAmericans took off with Huh and I couldn’t find them anywhere!

Croooooow: This must be serious. He’s lost his lisp.

Cheesecake: We have to do something.

Croooooow: If they’ve resorted to kidnapping Huh, they must want something. Let’s pay the UnAmericans’ locker room a visit and see what’s up.

Cynric: What about what’s down?

Croooooow: We already know what will be down, and on the ground, and bleeding. The UnAmericans.

Cynric and Shadow nod, and the four walk out the door.

INT. HALLWAY – NIGHT

Croooooow, Cynric, Shadow and Cheesecake stop outside the UnAmericans’ dressing room.

Croooooow: Okay, on three we barge in and kick some UnAmerican ass. Ready?

The others nod.

Croooooow: One… two… three!

INT. LOCKER ROOM - NIGHT

They open the door and run into the locker room. However, there’s no one there, but a note is on a bench.

Shadow: What the hell?

Croooooow picks up the note and reads it.

Croooooow: If you don’t meet our demands, we will end Huh’s career in front of the world, starting next week. Signed, William Regal, Lance Storm, Christian and Test.

Cheesecake: What are their demands?

Croooooow: It doesn’t say.

Shadow: So what should we do?

Croooooow: For now? Let’s search the building. If we can’t find them, we’ll just have to wait and see what their demands are.

They leave the locker room.

Heat

MATCH: Cynric vs. Raven

Cynric loses to Raven after falling victim to the Raven Effect.