1/28/02-2/3/02
Raw
INT. LOCKER ROOM – NIGHT
In the locker room, Croooooow is lacing up his boots while Nykk paces back and forth.
Nykk: Okay, I think I have a plan to get us out of this mess.
Croooooow: What is it?
Nykk: Kane.
Croooooow: Kane?
Nykk: Yeah, we get a match with Kane. Tell Kane to find a partner, and even put our belts on the line. When we get out there, I’ll come in with a chair and get us disqualified!
Croooooow: Sounds good, but how are we going to get a match with Kane?
Nykk: Follow me.
They exit the locker room.
INT. BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
Kane is going toward his dressing room when he runs across Nykk and Croooooow.
Nykk: Well, well, well, if it isn’t the guy who got our friends suspended.
Kane stops and looks at them.
Croooooow: It’s nice to see you back, Kane, it really is. You know, we don’t appreciate you going and getting burned just to get Dusty and Jay suspended for two weeks. Talk about low. What do you have to say for yourself?
Kane: Back off.
He starts to walk away but Nykk grabs him.
Nykk: No, Kane, I don’t think you understand. We’re not talking to you for our health. We want revenge in the name of the Pyro Twins, so we’re challenging you to a match tonight. We’ll even put our titles on the line, if you can find a partner. Now, do you have the guts to accept or are we going to have to get our revenge right here and now?
Kane: I’ll see you in the ring.
He leaves as Nykk and Croooooow smile.
INT. ARENA – NIGHT
MATCH: Cynric vs. The Hurricane
Cynric’s theme hits and he makes his way to the ring, along with Cheesecake.
JR: Here’s an odd pairing, to say the least. The Chief Assassin and the Supervillain.
King: Look at Cheesecake, he still has the Hurricane’s cape!
JR: Cheesecake obviously out here to get an up close view of the upcoming match.
The Hurricane’s theme hits and the Hurricane makes his way to the ring, with Mighty Molly.
JR: The Hurricane is looking to get his cape back, but he’s been unable to do so thus far with it in the possession of Cheesecake.
The match lasts about four minutes. As Hurricane takes control, Cheesecake gets on the apron, allowing Mighty Molly to hit the Molly-Go-Round on Cynric. Hurricane covers, but the ref is distracted. Hurricane takes a swing at Cheesecake, who drops of the apron and Cynric attacks from behind. Cheesecake climbs to the top rope and tries a flying bodypress while wearing the Hurricane’s cape. The Hurricane moves and Cheesecake takes out Cynric. Hurricane executes the Eye of the Hurricane on Cynric and pins him.
JR: The Hurricane with the victory. Wait a minute!
Cheesecake attacks Hurricane from behind. He and Cynric beat on him for a few moments and then throw him from the ring.
King: The PPV Squad just took out the Hurricane!
Steve Blackman runs down to the ring with a pair of nunchukus. He flies into the ring and takes down Cynric and Cheesecake with shots to the ribs.
JR: It’s Steve Blackman, and he’s got those nunchukus!
King: He’s going ballistic, JR!
Cynric rolls out of the ring and head up the ramp while Blackman whips Cheesecake into the ropes and hits him in the groin with the nunchukus on the rebound. Cheesecake falls out of the ring in pain as Blackman’s music plays.
JR: Steve Blackman is not going to forget what happened at the Royal Rumble!
INT. LOCKER ROOM – NIGHT
The Big Show is getting ready when Kane walks in.
Big Show: What’s up, Kane?
Kane: You said that you respect me, right?
Big Show: Yeah.
Kane: I know we had some problems on Smackdown, but hear me out. How would you like to be one half of the tag team champions? And get your hands on the PPV Squad again?
Big Show pretends to think it over.
Big Show: I like the sound of that.
He and Kane shake hands as the Show laughs.
INT. LOCKER ROOM – NIGHT
Nykk and Croooooow stare at the previous segment on a monitor with their mouths wide open. Huh walks on camera.
Huh: Hey, guys. What’s going on?
Croooooow: (in disbelief) We have a match against Kane and the Big Show for the WWF Tag Team Titles tonight…
Huh: Huh? Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you! Flair gave me a message to give you. He says that Tajiri’s in Japan this week promoting the WWF’s tour there in March. He says you guys don’t have to defend the titles against him and Jerry Lynn tonight, so you have the night off! Isn’t that great?
They stare at him with agonized expressions on their faces.
Nykk: Why didn’t you tell us this earlier?
Huh: Huh?
Nykk: Come with me!
He drags Huh off camera.
Croooooow: What did we ever do to deserve such bitter irony?
INT. BACKSTAGE – NIGHT
The Hurricane and Mighty Molly are walking out of the arena as Cheesecake walks up to them.
Molly: Holy fruitcakes, Hurricane!
Cheesecake: I th’uppose you think you’re real th’mart th’ending Th’teve Blackman out there to hit me with nunchuku’th. The way I th’ee it, you have th’omething I want, and I have th’omething you want. Th’o on Th’mackdown, how about we have a match? If you win, you get your cape back. If I win, you shed thi’th th’uperhero identity for good. What do you th’ay?
Hurricane: So the fearsome Cheesecake wants to settle this once and for all instead of hiding behind a wall of human protection? Wassupwitdat!? I accept your challenge, you villainous villain. Come Smackdown, we will see which way the fate of the WWF goes. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have no time to waste! I must make preparations. Molly, to the Hurri-cycle!
With a whoosh of wind, Hurricane and Mighty Molly swiftly go off camera, leaving Cheesecake standing there.
INT. ARENA – NIGHT
MATCH: Nykk and Croooooow vs. The Big Show and Kane
The PPV Squad theme hits and Nykk and Croooooow make their way to the ring, accompanied by Huh.
JR: Here come the tag team champions, who earlier on thought they could weasel out of their promise to grant Tajiri and Jerry Lynn a tag team title shot. Instead, they wound up in a match with the Big Show and Kane and then realized that Tajiri was in Japan, and not even in attendance!
King: Poor PPV Squad! They’re going to get squashed tonight.
The Big Show’s theme hits and he waits on the ramp for Kane to come out. They run into the ring and Kane takes out Huh as the Big Show goes for Croooooow. Nykk slides out of the ring.
JR: Here we go! The tag team titles are on the line!
The match starts as Nykk brings in a chair to try their original plan. The Big Show merely punches the chair back into Nykk’s face. The match goes about six minutes. As the Big Show gets the hot tag, he lays into Nykk. As he’s about to go for the chokeslam, Croooooow runs in to break it up, causing Kane to come in. A brawl erupts, and Croooooow goes under the ring to grab a blowtorch. He waves it threateningly at Kane. At the mere thought of being burned again, Kane backs off. Croooooow chases him with it, and Kane backs up the ramp. As the ref tries to get Croooooow to drop the blowtorch, Nykk goes to the top rope. He tries a double axehandle, but the Big Show grabs him by the throat. Huh comes in the ring with another chair, but the Show catches him by the throat, causing Huh to drop the chair. Nykk grabs the chair and hits Big Show in the groin with it. He gives the chair to Huh, who drops to one knee and sets the chair on it. Nykk brings Show to the corner and gets on the second rope. He bulldogs Show onto the chair, knocking him out and causing Huh to fall and hold his knee in pain. He covers as Croooooow comes back to the ring. The ref turns around and makes the three count.
JR: And the PPV Squad steals ANOTHER one!
King: Can these guys be beaten? You have to admit, JR, they’re smart.
JR: Maybe too smart.
Nykk and Croooooow pose victoriously while Huh holds his knee on the mat.
King: And they are STILL tag team champions?
JR: They don’t look all too heroic with their friend lies writhing in pain behind them.
Smackdown
INT. PROMO SET – NIGHT
Lillian Garcia is standing by with Nykk and Croooooow.
Lillian: Nykk, Croooooow, tonight you face perhaps your toughest challenge to date as you put the tag team titles on the line against Jerry Lynn and Tajiri, two men who seem to have your number, so to speak.
Nykk: I’m not one to come out here and whine about having a title defense tonight. I’m not going to do that. The fact that we’re defending the titles just a few days after getting thrown around the ring by Kane and the Big Show, I’m fine with. But it’s just not fair! Who do these guys think they are, anyway? Not world-class workers like the PPV Squad. Lynn, Tajiri, you’ve stepped into the biggest pile of dung of your careers. You saw what I did to Edge a month ago. Expect the same treatment tonight.
Croooooow: The way I see it, Lillian, is that we’ve got two guys who just can’t let go of the past. These guys are used to chants of E-C-W! E-C-W! They pride themselves on competing in one of the toughest wrestling organizations ever. Well, guess what? ECW is out of business, and you two are merely two cast-offs, making you small fish in a big pond. Well, if Tajiri and Lynn are the pond scum, the PPV Squad is the chlorine. See if we don’t purify this place a bit.
They leave the set.
INT. ARENA – NIGHT
MATCH: Cheesecake vs. The Hurricane
Cheesecake’s theme hits and he makes his way to the ring, wearing the Hurricane’s cape.
Cole: This could be the last time we’ll have to watch Cheesecake wear that cape around like it’s some kind of accessory.
King: That’s right, if the Hurricane wins this match, he gets his precious cape back. But if he loses…
Cole: He has to shed his superhero identity.
The Hurricane’s theme hits and he comes out with Mighty Molly.
Cole: Hurricane looking for revenge after a month of being mocked by this “supervillain,” Cheesecake.
The match goes about four minutes. As Cheesecake goes for the Screw Driver, Hurricane counters into a bulldog. He bounces off the ropes, but Cheesecake hits a reverse elbow. He goes for a running powerslam, but Hurricane counters with the Eye of the Hurricane, pinning Cheesecake. He walks over to the corner and retrieves his cape, draping it over his shoulders.
Cole: What a win for the Hurricane!
King: The superhero can fly again, Michael!
Cole: Maybe now this feud will finally be finished.
King: Poor Cheesecake. His dreams of conquering the WWF, shattered!
Cole: What?
INT. ARENA – NIGHT
The PPV Squad theme hits and Nykk and Croooooow make their way to the ring.
Cole: After almost two weeks, Jerry Lynn and Tajiri finally get their shot at the tag team gold right here tonight on Smackdown!
King: The Squad tried like hell to avoid this one, but it looks like Lynn and Tajiri finally caught up with them.
Jerry Lynn’s theme hits and he and Tajiri make their way to the ring, along with Torrie Wilson.
Cole: This could be Lynn and Tajiri’s night. We could have new tag team champions!
The match goes about seven minutes. Toward the end, Tajiri gets the hot tag and comes in to pound away on Croooooow. He hits his handspring elbow and sets up for his kick, but Nykk comes in to forearm him from behind. Lynn runs in and they back the Squad into opposite corners. The ref tries to get only two men in the ring, but ends up getting squashed when Lynn and Tajiri try and whip Nykk and Croooooow into each other. Lynn hits the Swinging DDT on Croooooow and Tajiri hits his kick on Nykk. As they go down, Huh runs into the ring and gets mist in the eyes. Cheesecake runs in and gets on the apron, but Lynn hits a springboard dropkick to knock him down. However, Nykk brings in a chair and hits Lynn from behind with it, causing him to fall out of the ring. Tajiri goes to the top rope, but Cynric runs in through the crowd and shakes the ropes. Tajiri gets crotched and Croooooow goes up top. He sets up Tajiri as if for a powerbomb and executes a wheelbarrow powerbomb from the top. On the way down, Nykk catches Tajiri in a DDT, knocking him cold. Nykk rolls out of the ring and Croooooow covers as the ref comes around. Lynn tries to break up the pin, but Nykk holds him by the foot and he can’t reach. Croooooow gets the three count and the PPV Squad win.
Cole: That is not right.
King: The PPV Squad did it again, when everyone thought Lynn and Tajiri were taking the titles! What a match!
Cole: The scary thing here is who’s left for the PPV Squad to beat? Thanks to their tactics, they’ve been unbeatable in title matches. Tajiri and Lynn have come the closest of anybody.
Jakked
MATCH: Cynric vs. Perry Saturn
Cynric wins with his big knee to the head.
Heat
MATCH: Huh vs. Scotty 2 Hotty
Cynric drops Scotty’s throat across the top rope as he’s about to complete the Worm, allowing Huh to roll him up and hook the tights for the pin.