a summary of a pocket and pain 
discussion.. 

life is a gift.. HAPPINESS IS A GIFT!! 
sometimes, ahh.. how do i say this.. 
we all have these times in our lives 
when we're going through some really 
tough shit emotionally.. when we get 
depressed.. when we feel lonely.. when 
the world seems to have gone and turned 
itself upside down on us again.. and 
we've gotta rubble through the muck 
and find our place.. AGAIN! but you 
know what? you know what just happened? 
you've just been given a cosmic 
bitchslap (one of my favorite pain 
words) meaning.. what is happening to 
you right now.. is that life is handing 
you a lesson to be learned.. 

pain: "it's usually at these times of 
great distress and weakness that some 
of life's most important lessons are 
learned...these times are necessary for 
our progression"

so here's what you do.. sit back for a 
minute.. silence yourself.. breathe.. 
and look around.. figure out what lesson 
is being given you. be open to it. 
recognize it and accept it. then.. all 
that's left.. is to smile.. and realize 
that every cosmic bitchslap is given 
out of love!! whatever divine force, 
stream, plan.. whatever is driving 
this.. LOVES US!! loves us so much! 
loves us perfectly.. and if we've 
survived the bitchslap, made it through 
and recognized the lesson.. then we've 
just gotten one step closer to.. 
perfection! i don't know.. whatever 
it is we're supposed to end up as.. 
beautiful, flawed perfection.. hehe.. 
i love life!

my all time favorite quote from pain:
painthrilla: (10:55 AM) that's right....
perception vs reality.....your 
perception of life when your bogged 
down is negetive and shit yet to you 
it is reality...however the real 
reality is life is fantastic and it 
is a gift that you are pissing away by 
not enjoying it and living it to it 
fullest and excersing your true will 
and all it takes is a shift in your 
perception to come back to that 
understanding

it's that easy, people! it's that easy 
to find happiness! all you have to do 
is shake it off.. shake off all the bs 
as if it were a casing of dried mud all 
over your body.. wiggle around, let it 
crack and crumble.. then shake it from 
your body! now open your eyes.. and 
turn.. shift your vision.. just like 
looking at one of those irritating 
dot pictures where if you focus just 
right, you can see the hidden image.. 
like walla! i can see it now! perception 
is such a beautiful word!

personally.. my latest lesson that 
i've had to learn.. is that love is 
beautiful! no matter what shape, or 
form, or direction it comes in.. it's 
beautiful and it's a gift! and.. i'm 
so lucky, that my latest lesson was 
such a wonderful one! hehe.. yay! now 
who wants to kill me for my abundant 
joyburst?