Welcome once again to another installment of "The Ride". If you have just started watching Planet Wrestling a little while ago, allow me to introduce myself as, the true "People's Champ", "The Corvette" Nick Corvello. I recently interviewed a contender for the highly anticipated match to crown "The Canadian Champion" at Battle for The Crown, which you can still get by calling your local cable operator right now! I was able to track down recent PAIN recruit Sean Swanson, to ask him a few questions before his first Planet Wrestling appearance on Pay Per View. Here's how it went:

"The Corvette": Well, Sean, I'd like to welcome you to the best section of PW Magazine, the section that people flip to first when they are reading this magazine, "The Ride".

Sean Swanson: The best section of PW Magazine? That can't be too hard. Well, anyway, I see that you have at least a MODERATE amount of intelligence. Screwing with Hank Albert, that was dumb. But having me here may just save your damn magazine.

"The Corvette": Whatever. Well, lets cut to the chase- How did your feud with The Canadian Crippler turn into this match at Battle For The Crown for the rights to be called "The Canadian Champion"?

Sean Swanson: At first, I just wanted that sh!t head to respect me, but then he jumped me while I was busy with Jansen. Now, I don't need his respect; his respect would cheapen me. I just want to cripple the so-called crippler.

"The Corvette": Now, going back a while, tell me your history in wrestling and how you became a Planet Wrestling superstar.

Sean Swanson: Long story. Do you have two hours? No? Well, I began my career in the CSW, and eventually bought the damn fed. I began to send promo tapes for the wrestlers out to Japan, where IUJPG, a great fed, is. They offered to buy CSW and all the wrestler contracts. I said sure, so I started working in Japan. When the management changed, they fired a lot of my best friends, so they could have money to tour the U.S.A. and Canada, and to pay the most egotistical bastard I know, the then IU champion, Crimson Rose. So I went on a quest, winning the IUJPG title from Anijobi Matsu, paralyzing him unfortunately. Then I sh!t wiped Crimson, took his IU belt (I did not win it, just stole it) and then told him that if he wanted it back, he would have to book us a match. He hired private eyes and mercenaries to find me, but with no success. Finally, he agreed that if I had the balls to come out of hiding, I could take my title shot. That night, I come out of my hiding spot, which was under the moron's bed, kicked the crap out of him, and put him in the back of his own car. I drove from St. Petersburg to Moscow (where the IU Pay Per View "Re- Spect" took place, that night), walked out to an incredible cheer, took him out of the trunk where he had been for three days without food, water, and in freezing winter, and kicked his @$$ again. I pinned him, then promptly quit, gave him his belt back, and went home to Canada.

"The Corvette": Tell me about the time when you decided to become a wrestler, and tell me what you did before you became an accomplished wrestler.

Sean Swanson: Didn't I just? I am not well known, so am I accomplished? I try, but... before I started wrestling, I worked at Taco Dons in the Coquitlam Centre mall, after that, I got a job bottling Jones soda. I became a writer for Marvel, very short lived, then tried out for CSW.

"The Corvette": So, how come you don't have a "nickname" for yourself? Many of these wrestlers do, so do you feel somewhat uncomfortable?

Sean Swanson: A nickname? I don't need one. But, let's say I had one. It would be "Director." Why? Because I'm half ready to direct "My foot meets your @$$", the motion picture. Not exactly a love story.

"The Corvette": Hey, you better know who you're being interviewed by! I was once a great wrestler, with many title reigns in my career, and I can still kick @$$, and normally I would lay you out right now, but I'm trying to play it cool, so just watch your mouth!

Sean Swanson: Title reigns? What, like "Daddy, always shitting" awarded by your daughter? Or, "Retard of the Year" as handed out by Hank Albert? I don't want a title shot, thank you very much.

"The Corvette": Hey, I don't want to get fired right now, so you're lucky.

Sean Swanson: Sure. But remember, I am your magazine's saviour!

"The Corvette": WhatEVER! Now, what are your plans after your upcoming match after "Battle For The Crown"?

Sean Swanson: Rudy Rudos, Ken Jansen, Extreme Title shot, and some good old fashioned sex.

"The Corvette": Now, were gonna play a little game. I Mention a name of a Planet Wrestling Superstar and you tell me the first thing that comes to your mind, ok?

Sean Swanson: Whatever.

"The Corvette": Ok, first, your upcoming opponent, The Canadian Crippler.

Sean Swanson: Doomed.

"The Corvette": Next, another guy who could have been in this match- Ken Jansen.

Sean Swanson: Arrogant.

"The Corvette": Now, the guy I scouted personally, "The Gold Dragon" Kevin Peterson.

Sean Swanson: A nobody.

"The Corvette": So, that's how you feel about the guy I scouted. Hmm. Well, now for Liam Drake, another man looking to bring some justice in the PW.

Sean Swanson: Humourous.

"The Corvette": Now, the most dominant stable right now, TSK.

Sean Swanson: Running out of time.

"The Corvette": Last but definitely not least, Me, "The True People's Champ", "The Corvette" of Wrestling, "The Corvette" Nick Corvello.

Sean Swanson: One hundred percent jack@$$, an egomaniac, and actually surprisingly intelligent and clean.

"The Corvette": Well, that's all for now. Sean, it was....... great..... to have you on "The Ride".

Sean Swanson: Was that sarcasm? You better f---ing hope not!

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