Here, enshrined for all eternity, shall be a list of laws to be obeyed by all who design web pages. These laws shall never be broken, or suffer the wrath of irritated browsers. Perhaps(and with luck) to never visit the site again.
I think I've covered the major ones, but feel free to suggest other laws that need adding. I shall update as needed.
1. Pop-up Advertizements - The first of the internet blasphemies, and still the scourge of the internet. A new window should NEVER open without the user clicking the link themselves. When a user does click a link to open a new window, only one should open. Any "tag-along" links that open with the initial click are as evil and unwanted as any other pop-up.
2. Flash and Java - A tool, not unlike harnessing the power of the atom, it can easily be corrupted and used for evil. The scripting of such languages is not evil in itself, but how it is used. Flash and Java applications have several legitimate uses, including several of the dumb little games I enjoy wasting time with.
But the script in general is a time consuming process to load eating up precious bandwidth. This is especially problematic for our ancient brothers still usinig a dial-up connection, but it can be no less of a problem for high-bandwidth users. Potential security risks and browser crashing are also frequent problems
The following uses are explicitly forbidden:
a. Pop-ups - Far more vile than any normal pop-up, these elude blocker software and instead run in the page itself. Worse still, some of them follow the mouse pointer, or remain in place even when scrolling. And in furthur defiance of this law, hide the close button, refuse to close, or delay a set period of time before closing themselves.
b. Roll-over Objects - These irritating beasties are most commonly found in the form of menus. Roll over an object on the menu with your mouse, and a sub menu appears. Sometimes advertizements are roll-over objects, which spawn pop-ups as mentioned above, or simply expand covering the true content on the site. In either case, we now have the same issues with the pop-ups themselves.
c. Flash/Java Pages - Sites like these have their uses, and can be very compelling presentationtools, but they should never be the only means of accessing a site. Any website which includes a flash/java page should offer the option of viewing the HTML version of the site, and skipping the animated ones. Also, this should be done BEFORE the animation begins to load or run, not durring or after.
3. Unmarked PDF Links - Few things are more annoying than browsing along a website and clicking a related link, only to have the cpu usage suddenly spike because the link you just clicked was a PDF file and now your computer is struggling to open it. The program takes FOREVER to load, which is a crime in itself for the simple functions 99% of us use Acrobat Reader for, but that's only part of the issue, and we wont be blaming the program for this mistake.
No, PDFs are another one of those useful tools that can be used the wrong way. In fact, many PDFs on the net are just fine as they are. The problem is when linked PDF documents are not marked as such and you find yourself cursing because you were unprepaired for the sudden lockup. Yes, usually by glancing down at the status bar, you can see exactly where a link goes, and pdf links are marked with the obvious .pdf tag. But honestly, who looks at that when they're clicking? Occasionally sure, when you're not sure where you're going to be directed, but 90% of the time or more? Didn't think so. Unmarked PDF links must stop.
4. Auto-refreshed Pages - Except in a few rare circumstances like stockmarket updates, or sports updates, auto-refresh is the devil. You're sitting there happily reading an article, when BAM! The screen goes white. And then suddenly the page you had been reading starts to re-appear. By this point you've totally lost your place in the article, and the page has reset to the top(at least untill it completes loading). Makes it tough to read, or do anything with a website for that matter. ALL web browsers have their own "refresh" key (often including the F5 hotkey), so let us reload the page ourselves and stop screwing with our happiness!
In the rare case where this code is acceptable, it should only reload those few portions of the page that change such as the time and score of a game, not the whole frickin page with all it's fancyness. Also, It should never be used in any page that requires scrolling. Make the information fit on a single page if you find the auto-refresh absolutely necissary. Also, find a reasonable refresh rate. People do need time to digest the information displayed, particularly if they're also managing other taks while looking up the latest sports scores.
5. Auto-load Audio/video - You may be starting to notice a trend here. Things that activate automatically tend to go against the basic principles of this list. NOTHING that is going to take extra time to load, or animate should EVER start automatically. It should only start after the user OK's the process by clicking whatever it is you want to show them in a new window or by following a link to a page exclusively for said content.
It's great that ESPN.com has video clips that you can watch, but to force them onto the main pages of the various sports is just eating more bandwidth and adding more load time. And when it screws up for whatever reason, it just pisses people off. Quit it.
6. Non-thumbnailed Image Galleries - Yep, you've found another trend. Bandwidth and load times. They should be as small as possible. Ya go to some random google searched page trying to find pics of your latest favorite band. You find a site that looks good, but once you get to the photo's section, all 50 of the photos are on one page, and at full resolution. Even with high-speed net, you're looking at a 30 second or better load time. And after that joyful experience is over, you get to scroll down several screens to find a decent picture! A few images on a page with related content are fine, but there's an easily dicernable point where you've got to many. This number is usually less than 4.
Thumbnails people. It is very simple to shrink images with a myriad of free programs, even en masse. Post those in a gallery, and THEN link them to the full size image so that it loads quickly, and I have a good idea of what I'll be looking at BEFORE I commit to viewing the image.
And no, you are not allowed to cheat by using HTML code to resize the image, because it still means the computer has to load the full size image before it shrinks it down. Nor is it acceptable to load just a few full size pics on a page and make the user hit "next" 10 times in order to see all of your photos.
7. Improper use of Frames - Another jekyl and hide rule. Frames can have their use. There's no better way to keep a site menue present on screen while scrolling thru large articles. But you've completely defeated the purpose if your frames require scrolling too. Make sure it doesn't happen.
8. Instant Re-direct Pages - This one could've almost grouped in with the auto-refresh, but it is different. It's another example of a site taking an action without a user command. A website moves and directs you to its new home page. Somewhat common, and really not so bad. Worse is when you think you're going to a website, and it instantly takes you to a different one. This should NEVER happen.
Even in the case of same-site re-directs, such as a moved home page, there needs to be a simple white/black screen with a short line of text informing you of the change, and a link directly to the re-direct.
9. Side-Scroll Pages - This one is just stupid, and thankfully, pretty rare. But pages that require you to scroll sideways to view are still a plague upon the web. Content should ALWAYS fit within a single left-right page. The one exception is on pages dedicated to a full resolution image.
10. Hidden URLs - All links should list their final location in the staus bar on mouse-over. If it doesn't, it's going to take you someplace you probably don't want to go. It is unacceptable to trick people into visiting a sponsor site or redirect the user from where they think they're going.
11. Proper Page Contrast - This is usually common sense, but it still can be a problem, especially on amature web sites. Contrast between objects and the background is the only way we mere mortals can actually see and decipher the content. Finding a "pretty" yellow pattern for your website's wallpaper, and then putting white text over it will be completely unintelligible. Equally terrible are brightness issues such as thin black text on a hot pink background, where you're straining your eyes just looking near the monitor.
Find something that doesn't cause pain or bleeding from the eyes when viewed. Simple black text on white works fine. Better yet, White text on Black means even less light is forced onto your retina reducing strain. Even simple things like using a larger font size or bolder font can make an otherwise unreadable page bearable.
12. Interrupted Content - A common problem with so many news and blog sites. Another perfectly good article. But here 2 paragraphs in, it suddenly stops, and you're faced with a commercial for some unpronounceable new prescription drug which treats who know's what. Scroll down a bit farther and, oh! That's where the rest of the article went.
Verboten!
13. Flashing Objects - Be it the page background or an obtrusive advertizement, things that blink fast enough to enduce epilepsy...Not cool. Cut it out.
14. Embeded Sound - I don't care how much you like the song, or how well it fits the theme of the site. It should never happen. Its another thing to use bandwidth and delay page loading. Worse still, many of us listen to music while using the computer. And if while browsing your retarded website, I'm forced to listen to noise drowining out whatever it is I'm trying to enjoy(especially if it's silence), I will not be happy. And since the only way to stop the embeded music is to leave the site, guess what I'm going to do.
Gallow's Pole
The following major websites have been guilty of breaking one or more of the essential laws. I'm leaving out Pop-ups because they're just so common that the list would be endless. Also, thanks to modern blocker software, MOST standard pop-ups can be avoided. New sites will be added as needed.
Fark.com - March 14, 2006. Included an auto-refresh metatag on it's mainpage for a one day "expiriment." In mere hours, public outcry and server overload forced the removal of the offensive code.
ESPN.com - Routinely has auto-load video content on various main pages for each sport covered. This disturbing trend continues to this day.
Myspace/Facebook/et. al. - Ooh boy how people love these sites. Violations are many, varied by particular user. Common abuses include Auto-loading audio/video content, side scrolling, non-thumbnailed images, and flashing objects.