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| Androgyny... the combining of both female and male characteristics. Over time, I have been told that I am one of the most androgynous persons others have ever met. Perhaps that is a particularly good trait for the wife of a CD to have. I suppose you could say that I can set a perfect example. Not so. For the traits that make me androgynous, are diametrically opposite of the traits that my CD considers highest on his list of androgynous traits. For example, one of us can walk past a shoe sale and not be tempted to even look. Both of us have closets full of shoes, but one of us feels that one closet full may just not be enough. And all the jokes about wives going to a sale at the mall, coming home with numerous packages and announcing not how much she spent, but how much she saved on the purchases. Now there is a real androgynous trait that my CD possesses! Waving a sale tag in front of his eyes is like the toreador waving the red flag in front of the bull. Ole! Roughly translated, that resounds of Wilma Flintstone's "Charge!" These are "typical" female traits that males have ridiculed for generations. And now look who is wanting to emulate that behavior? | ||||||||||
| While this scenario is intended to bring about a little mirth and humor, it is one of the biggest challenges our families face. For those very same qualities that we, as GW's face and from a perception aspect are trying to remove from our personality, are the very same ones that our spouses are wanting to achieve. Think about many of the jokes that have traditionally been feminine territory. How accurate are they to your CD? Does it take you nearly so long to get "ready," or does a splash of lipstick and a swipe with the comb do it? How much agonizing do you do over what shoes and purse match what outfit? Does "Give me a minute," equate to the same amount of time for both of you? And just how long do you stand in front of the mirror on your way out the door? | ||||||||||
| Perhaps we can learn some of our old behaviors back and ask for the same tolerance for ourselves that we are asking ourselves to provide our spouses. Maybe we all need to take just a little bit of time and enjoy that to which we are entitled. Any relationship needs to have considerable give and take, and as wives of CD's, we call upon ourselves to have more tolerance in many more ways than most wives. Congratulate yourself on all the ways that you provide and give tolerance to your significant other, but don?t lose sight that there needs to be a little take for you, too. Pamper the feminine side of yourself a little. Luxuriate in a bubble bath, if that appeals to you. Give yourself a manicure...or better yet, a pedicure with shiny polish. Maybe even pick up a toe ring to wear with sandals. Let us, the GW's learn and enjoy just a little of that unexpected, special femininity that our CD looks for with such determination. | ||||||||||
| Speaking of which, these androgynous seeking males are, in fact, heterosexual. They not only enjoy the aspects of the feminine ego when and where they choose, but they are equally appreciative of the feminine side of you. They want to enjoy both the feminine AND the masculine areas of their lives. Who can make that masculine side of their lives more enjoyable than the feminine side of you? Opposites attract. Variety is the spice of life. Over and over the yin and yang, the black and white, the masculine and feminine complement each other. | ||||||||||
| Oh, and that someone who feels that perhaps one closet full of shoes isn't quite enough? Well, maybe that is because through it all, we, the GW's, are the most possessed, self-assured, and secure in our lives. We don't feel the pressure to prove ourselves and our femininity. We are self-assured, confident and feminine. We can compete and conquer what life throws our way. We have the self-assurance to be what we are and get what we want. We don't have to prove anything to anyone. But we do have to remember to let our feminine sides shine once in a while, too. After all, it is the contrast that makes the brights brighter and the darks darker. The detergent that fades the colors takes away the brilliance that that contrast enhances. Keep your feminine colors bright! | ||||||||||
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