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Summer
2007
Martial Arts
NEWS
(bollocks)
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Issue
No. 8
UK
Edition
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<--
7th. Issue
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U K S M A C K D O W N !
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Who are the people of the United Kingdom, and what
are they doing with our Martial Arts?
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In this issue of NthDegree, we take a reflective satirical tour
of the
ferocious feline wanting to be a pacified lion. and
ask,... why?
With respect, of
course.
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Classical
Training:
From
the MOORS to the TOWER OF LONDON
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We first look at England's classic period of training
devices and methods. It gives us a perspective glimpse into the
intensity of early English training methods.
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Swordsman defends his Pint during training.
Strange French person.
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First dojo in England:
October 28th, 6472 B.C.
Conditioning implements, 1546 A.D.
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Little know East-West connection – Was Martial Arts
brought to Asia from England?
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"Medieval Makiwara"
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COLONIAL RULE
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East Clashes West over Tea supremacy.
(result was a
draw: Both shared the tea
….and the girl.)
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In the mostly successful 100 year campaign to monopolize
free trade, the fighting art methods became secondary to a strategy of deterrents
and reprisals levied against their opponents. The reliance of these
strategies led to the deterioration of the physical fighting arts, which accounted
for the skewed overcompensation in their next era we examine…
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“Right. If
this blasted Gandhi bloke won’t pay his tab for our English newspaper
delivery, let’s see if he will pay us to NOT cinder his bleedin village.”
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Royal Guard remains, carbon dated: 1740 A.D.
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US Citizen speaks his mind: Why did the British lose
the Americas?
“They wore big colorful targets so even a young drunk
hick from Tennessee raised on squirrel meat could pick them off from up in
a tree at 100 yards with a musket.”
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VICTORIAN ERA
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To understand how contemporary British Martial Arts
(BMA) formed, we now take a look at the post-industrial native fighting
methods and weapons of choice of the British: The CANE and
BROLLY. This period is of particular interest, since import of
things Asian to England at the time, were limited to Spices and Opium.
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The Battle of Dorking 1871
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'Morris Grappling' re-enactment 
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The Gentleman's Fighting Manual 1899
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Anglo-Chinese Boxers:
1899 A.D.
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The industrial
period saw the reluctant decline of Colonialism expansion and the necessary
migration of workers from rural farm to urban settings. Coupled with the realization of having lost
touch with their physical fighting spirited roots - These three main
factors altered the shape of Britain’s Fighting Arts forever. Swords were sheathed and knuckles were
bared.
For the
upperclassman, swordwork was replaced by fighting with apparel accessories.
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Bare Knuckle Boxer: 1853
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The coined term “Fighting Irish” catches on during the
19th century potato famine.
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Martial
Arts 20th Century UK
Wars break out around the globe with
England finding herself in the middle.
First, Europe erupts into chaos after Germany realizes it’s been
getting screwed by the sea-bordering countries monopolizing sea trade for
the past two centuries – then change their tactic and instigate another war
by allowing a maniac to fantasize: hey, what if Germany and it’s people
were the only one’s on Earth?
The conflicts
eventually spread around the world, and England is in the difficult
position of protecting the freedoms of it’s slave colonies. They strive to beat back the Japanese
in the determined effort to keep China and India British while mainland Europe
crumbles.
After the dust
settles from a mushroom cloud, a variety of overseas influences in
traditional Asian fighting arts take hold, which by happenstance, are
imported back to the UK and other countries with similar socio-economic self-interests.
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Kobudo 'Victory Fishing' in Essex
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The Blitz 1940 – British man demonstrates the
Homeland defense backup plan B to
the Spitfire’s Luftwaffe defense plan A.
(fortunately,
plan A was sufficient).
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Crosstrainer
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 Ultraviolent Codwork Orange belt.
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Modern Martial
Arts in the UK:
The £ION Enters
The $TREAM.
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Pushing Books on Amazon.uk 
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Magazine Debut! XMMA
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The British Islander Arts are a mosaic reflection of
their long martial past – The medieval masochist turned contemporary
commercialist who wishes the skill of their ancestors and an image of Victorian legitimacy strata while
cloaked in ancient mystery…for 50 Quid per class.
….kindof like everyone else in the modern World, except
uniquely British.
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UNION JACKED ! TM
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