The Real Me
Written By:Emme
Must they look at me? Why must they stare? Does no-one see me for who I
really am? For who do I live? I don't live how I want to live, I want to be me.
All they see is a public fabrication of me. I am not who they see. My life is
perfect in their eyes, inside my heart bleeds with pain, waiting to explode, one
day I will be free.
Multi-millionaire, who cares? Money isn't everything, right? Must I do what the
want me to? Can't I be the sweet guy who wants a quiet life. Sure, music is my
one true love but what is the fun in being disgraced by who I really am? I love to sing, to dance, if only I could cover my face, make me invisable, make me free from the torture of the public eye.
The fans are great, they don't know me for me though. I want the world to see
who I really am. Can my life really be called a life or merely an existance?
Sure, I have the beautiful woman on my arm, the expensive cars and jewelry, the
mansion, the platinum records on the wall and the awards in the cabinet but one
thing I am missing, the most important thing to me, happiness. Love. That is a
word which I merely dream about. Love. The word looks so enticeing, the smooth, sharp, refresshing straightness of the 'L', the silky smooth, pleasantness of the 'o'. 'v', with it's severity, this is a refreshing change. the it ends with the luscious combination of these three previous with the 'e'. It has everything, curves, definitive sharp edges and comes to an end. A point of no return. This is where life should end. Life cannot be relived, we have one chance and I am living in hiding. Never being true to my feelings. God cares about me, my Mother and family do, nobody else really cares for me like they do.
I continuous receive compliments, everyday a surge of "Justin you're so talented, you're so gorgeous." "Justin, please sign this, I would die for you" Justin, you are my shining light." "Justin you look so good today, can't wait to hear your perfect voice."
I ask myself, what about my perfect heart of my mind, do they love that as much
as they love the image the world knows me as?
One day they will realise, one day they will see. I really am a good guy, I am not a spoit brat who always gets what he wants. Sure I want for nothing
materialistically but what about what the heart wants? I want a quiet life, a
beautiful, intelligent wife, who wants me for me, not my status. I want children
to help occupy our reasonably sized country home. I want the dog, the white
picket fence, the home made pie. I want to be known as Justin, their father, her
husband, the guy from church, the one who provides for his family without
flaunting his wealth. Not the Justin available today, he will die in time, his evil entity will eventually fade.
Love. Life. Happiness. These are the most important things in the world, never
to be overlooked.
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