a friend, named tony, recently stated that a dead tony is not fun at all, but i choose to object. although a dead tony might not play super smash brothers as well, it doesn't mean a dead tony can't be fun. in the rest of the article, i by no means condone killing people named tony or playing with one if he happens to be dead.

first off, a dead tony could be fun because you'd never lose at video games. currently, tony is not much fun to play super smash brothers with because he always wins when i play. that doesn't have anything to do with me sucking at the game. it has to do with the fact that since he is alive he can react to my every video game move. it would be much easier for me if i played against a dead tony, not that i wish tony to be dead, because i'd no longer have to invest time scaling the learning curve for nintendo 64 games.

nintendo is a trademarked word. as is super smash brothers. neither condone killing people named tony or playing with dead people named tony, although both do condone video game violence, which i don't mind. the problem in our world is not a video game problem, but a parenting problem. i won't get started because the issue skimmed in the last sentence is a whole new mountain of rants.

it would be funny to place a dead tony in a public area, and then blame people walking by on his death. or perhaps selling him on e-bay. one could have him freeze dried in entertaining positions to start humorous conversations at parties. one could even play "hot tony," which is much like hot potato, except it involves throwing tony around with a catapult, as an ice breaker. i take no responsibility for the misuse of catapults or injuries incurred by the use of.

my point is, he might not find it fun and it would not be cool if he were dead, but it wouldn't stop us from having fun, which is what he'd want us to do. okay, he might not want us to freeze dry him in humorous positions - but he wouldn't have a say at that point.