SPECIAL TO THE STAR
"There's a time in a woman's life when she's not in love, when she's not in a relationship, when she doesn't have a boyfriend or a husband, when she hasn't taken a lover," begins Anne Marie Scheffler in the Tim Sims Playhouse's second mounting of Not Getting It. "I mean who takes a lover?" she asks, "maybe the French."
ANNE MARIE SCHEFFLER'S NOT GETTING IT LOOKS AT SEX AND SINGLES WITH LAUGHS AND MUSIC
BY JON KAPLAN
Trying out a series of fantasy men (all played by Adrian Churchill), she figures out why she's not getting it, and, just as importantly, the dating pattern she's set up for herself. Churchill's roles, which sometimes rely on a gruff and entertaining allure, touch the male viewers, while Scheffler gets more than a few knowing laughs from the women in the audience. Everyone appreciates the first-date scene, where Scheffler chooses clothes that say, "I want you to fuck me but respect me too much to do it."
Singing bits of pop and show tunes, MacDonald gives a nice musical counterpoint to the action, creating an instant mood with his sometimes growling, sometimes honey-sweet voice. But ultimately it's Scheffler who gets it here -- the audience's laughs and empathy, if not the sex.
BEST LAID PLANS
BY JON KAPLAN
NOT GETTING IT by Anne Marie Scheffler (Not So Norma). See listings, this page. What's a single woman gonna do when the itch gets strong? The sexual itch, that is. Carrie and the girls on Sex And The City have their ways to scratch. So does Bridget Jones.
"The show explores the single woman's need to get laid," offers Scheffler, "as well as the question of how long can you go without having sex -- and how healthy that is. Can we follow our libidos, like the men we're supposed to be avoiding?
"Society tells single women to be sexually attractive, but does it allow us to be sexually active, too?"
Not Getting It is Scheffler's most personal show to date. She's best known for solo shows about Norma Green, the Hockley Hills Potato Queen, who left small-town life to find love and success in the big city. Infusing the fictional Norma with comic charm and emotional truth, Scheffler won over Canadian audiences.
She expects that the harder truths of Not Getting It will still attract viewers, in part because of the packaging.
"As a middle child and a Leo -- and a performer with a clown background -- I'm all for entertaining."
NOW MAGAZINE.
LET'S TALK ABOUT MY SHOW!
Lianne George
The National Post
Tonight, Scheffler, a Toronto actress and Second City alumnus, opens her fifth one-woman show, called Not Getting It, at the Buddies in Bad Times Theatre. A forthcoming rumination on sex and single life for women in their 30s, the show carries the tagline, "It's not easy being easy."
Revealing elements of her private life on stage is not new to Scheffler, who is best known in Canada for her work on the Fringe Festival circuit. Her Norma Trilogy, three one-woman shows about a small-town girl who dreams of becoming a world-famous actress, was also not-so-loosely based on her own life.
"I went to high school in Alliston," she says. "I grew up on a dirt road. It was hard to even date me because I was so far away. So I couldn't wait to get to the big city. Then when I got here I was like, 'Ah, pay attention to me! I'll do anything!' "
The idea behind her new show is essentially that women in their 30s are torn between the desire for affirmation from men, and the pressure to reject this desire. The result is a kind of paralysis.
"It's about making the same mistakes over and over again," she says. And it's about the finicky art of having one's sexual needs met when not involved in a relationship. Unlike the carefree ladies on Sex and the City, she says, when real women consider casual sex, they have to factor in things like sexually transmitted diseases, reputation, morality and loneliness.
"I wanted to address the situation where all of a sudden you're without a boyfriend; your sexual needs are not being met; you're living alone; and then you start thinking, 'Holy moley! This is my sexual peak. I should be having sex.' Women in their 30s go through years -- did I say years? -- of being celibate."
None of the alternatives available to women at this stage of life, she says, are very appealing. What should you do? Slap on your push-up bra and sexiest outfit (she points to her own dress, which, in fact, she's wearing for an audition right after the interview) and go out and have casual sex with some person who might not have a soul? "Then you become like those men you've been avoiding."
"I have to tell you," she says, "I've always been looking for the marriage and the children and the stability. At least that's what I say, but I'm always attracted to the wrong person.
"I totally have a Mr. Big in my life," she adds, referring to Carrie's emotionally unavailable sometimes-boyfriend on Sex and the City. "All single women have a Mr. Big in their life. You tell yourself, 'I'm going to change him. I'm gonna be the one.' Then years go by and it's like, 'This is ridiculous. I have no eggs left.' "
She plans to take Not Getting It -- which she has also adapted into a full-length screenplay -- to Los Angeles next year. In the meantime, Scheffler will appear in the upcoming Vincenzo Natali sci-fi movie Cypher, starring Lucy Liu. She's also a regular on Real Men, a Maxim-esque talk show on The Men's Channel, in which she provides a sexy female's point of view on things like cars, chicks and gadgets.
Given the number of Canadian actors who've headed south to find fame and fortune, Scheffler has mixed feelings about trying to make it in Los Angeles. "I've been in Toronto since I was 18," she says. "Do I leave this for, 'Hi, I'm brand new. Can I come into your gigantic city? Do you need another blond? Early 30s? Fake breasts ... I could get 'em?' "
As a female actress, Scheffler says it's easy to get caught up in "shallow concerns" about marriage, wrinkles and being sexy. But everytime she comes to the conclusion that she should focus on loftier things like politics or charity, she says, something will happen to upset her resolution.
"My agent will say, 'Anne Marie [a casting director] has booked you. They think you're sexy.' And I'm like, 'Thank god, I was going to kill myself.' The balance is so hard to find."
"Outstanding performance! Brilliantly written & performed. Captures the relationship craziness of our times."
-Chris Valley Ban
"Bitingly accurate for any couples not yet married. Scheffler's sharp wit and unabashed honesty brings to the stage a steamy and thorough look at all relationships."
-Alan Herman
"Every second sizzles in this lively one-act play of modern female libido and dating. Mega- actor-writer-producer Anne Marie Scheffler makes us laugh as she carries her small cast to new realizations and destinies. Thoughtful musical counterpoints and jibes. Not to be missed!"
- Karen Crozier
"Anne Marie Scheffler lays out a humorous twist on a single woman's trials and tribulations of finding love and professional respect in a world of oversexed self serving and manipulative men and uncooperative fantasy characters. Anne Marie will make you laugh by daring to say what is often thought but not often said in mixed singles company.
This is about a relationship girl in a world of come on's, turn on's, and dreams that just won't co-operate."
-Carmen Charette
"I just saw the opening of this very funny show by Anne Marie Scheffler. Adrian Churchill and Anne Marie perform brilliantly. The show is about a lot of stuff including the difference between love and lust, and what goes on in the shower before a date. Lots of laughs, songs, even an insight or two. GO!"
-Lory Berger
"She keeps getting better! Not Getting It - funny and honest and intelligent and hilariously engaging! A quality show!"
- Taivi Lobu