Nature's Most Cunning Rodent:       The Mexican Stomping Goat

Lots of people have rodents, such as mice, rats and bats, in their attic. But the most annoying is quite possible the Mexican Stomping goat. I and my friends Eric and Bryan took a trip to our local Meijers a couple days ago to find some Mexican Stomping Goat traps. Luckily, there was only a couple left and I bought them HAHA! I have spent these past few weeks tracking down the  Mexican stomping goats that has been running behind walls of my house, and walking around in my attic...sneaky bastards they are! I can not count the times I have awoke in the middle of the night to a loud, crashfull, stomping in my attic. And just as I pounce through my attic opening, they all scurry and run and hide! Damn them!

I knew I had a Mexican Stomping Goat problem three months ago, when i caught a hurd of those sonuvabitchs eating my toilet paper. And as any Mexican Stomping Goat expert knows, they travel in  packs, so I knew that wouldnt be the last I saw of  them.  A few days later is when the real problems arose, they started to multiply...no seriously, multiply, they are really good at math, I shit you not.  They fucking love that shit.

The thing is, with the mexican stomping goat, you can never underestimate them. They are smart. They hide where you least expect. Like in the the heating and cooling vents, they breed and hide their nests there.

They come from from their native land of Mexico (obviously) and two goals in life. One, to breed, two, to kill off all the Americans and Canadians, and reclame what was once their home land. They plan to  do this with their related family, the Farm Monkeys. Which you may have heard of. There is quite a interesting legend behind the Farm Monkeys...but thats a whole other story.