The story starts in first period at school- Serge is worried because he knows Leena
and Kid will fight over him like a piece of meat. It is based on my old H.S where the
easiest way to sneak out of campus is by going through the front entrance. Everyone is in the 11th
grade, including Van, who was skipped a grade because of his intelligence. The others, Norris,
Karsh, Dario and Glenn are all college students, working part time in Serge's High School.
Karsh is a gym instructor along with Glenn, a dopey student teacher. Norris works as the school
security guard.
They're just sitting in class, waiting for it to end.
It's an 11th grade English class- Serge is writing a note to Leena and one to Kid,
saying if they start to fight over him, he won't go to prom with either of them.
Leena and Kid start to give each other dirty looks throughout class.
Teacher: So remember the quiz for next time. That's all.....
Kid is giving Leena dirty looks while Serge wriets the notes.
Serge: (scribbling faster) ....and anyway I plan to ask a special girl for the prom...
Leena: (whispers to Kid) Got a date for the prom? Heh...
Kid: Like bloody hell I do! Do YOU?
Leena: I do!
Kid: Reaaaaaaaally..? Big Brother Norris doesn't count. Heh
Kid is referring to the young college student Norris, who works as a student security guard
afternoons after his college classes and is also close friends with Leena.
Serge is still scribbling.
Leena: No! For your information, I'm going out with someone in this class!
Kid: *rests her chin on her hands* Ohhh nya ha ha. Well so am I!
Leena: Oh? Bet you'll never guess who my date is!
Kid: Heh, bloody hell, everyone knows you're going with your chummy friend Norris.
You're always with him anyway! I'm sure Serge will understand. *smirks*
Leena: Hmmph! For YOUR information....I'm going with Serge!
Kid: *stands up* Oi!! No you're not, he's going with me!!
Serge shakes his head and puts it down on the desk.
Teacher: Ladies! Ladies! Sit until the bell rings!
Kid: *sits and smiles at Leena* Well now, you think you're so sweet and tender, but look
at you now! Manipulative, trying to steal someone else's man!
(Lazully looks at Serge- she is the size of a kindergardener and her feet don't reach the
floor of her desk- she then glances at Leena and Kid).
Lazuli: Don't argue about it....
Kid: Oi, shut the bloody hell up kid, go back to pre-school already!
Serge: *still sulking in embarrassment* Why Me??
Lazuli: I'm not a preschooler!
Kid: Heh heh heh...who cares. The prom is for big kids like us... *turns to Leena* But
not TOO big kids like college boy Norris! Heh.
Leena: Shut up, Kid! Oh! (she slaps her forehead) I'm going with Serge!
Serge stands up.
Serge: SHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT UPPPPP !!! Both of you!
Teacher: Sit until the bell rings!
Serge: NO!!
The bell rings- everyone leaves and goes to their lockers- Leena follows Kid.
Leena: Kid. Kid...maybe I can help you!
Kid: *turns to Leena* Oh how the bloody hell can you hellp me?
Leena:...find a date to the prom.
Kid: Oh? *chiding* And HOW can you do that?
Leena: I don't know....we can work it out. I want to be your friend.
Kid: Yeah its already worked out. I'm going with Serge. Don't worry, you'll look
sensational with Norris at the prom. *snickers*
Leena groans- she drops her books and stays behind while she picks them up as
Kid walks on, chuckling.
Kid: (to herself) Serge is mine....
Meanwhile, Serge walks up to Lazuly hoping to ask her out. Lazuly is getting books from
her locker.
Serge: ...............
Serge: Umm...Laz....
Lazuly: Oh. (she turns) Hello, Serge.
Serge: Laz...umm....we...umm...
Lazuly:....hmm?
Serge:........will you go with me to the prom??? *dies*
Lazuly: Hm...(she giggles) I'd love to go with you, Sergey. But what about Leena and
Kid?
Serge: *wakes up* Well, I can't stand thier fighting! And I don't want to hurt either of them
so its best that I go with you. Besides, you're cute...
She giggles insanely.
Lazuly: How sweet of you, Sergey.
Kid walks up and grabs Lazuly and shoves her in a locker.She screams from the inside.
Kid: Oiiii!!!! I can't believe that stupid fairy!!!
Serge: Hey come on Kid, don't be mean!!
Kid: OIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!! *she slaps Serge and walks off*
Serge: ...............................................
Leena smiles smugly and walks up to Serge
Leena:.....hi, Serge!
Serge: Hello Leena. I was just talking to Lazy here.*pulls her out of the locker*
Leena: Oh? What were you talking about?
Serge: Well....I'm.....taking her to the prom..
Leena: Who, me? Oh, Serge...
Serge:...............I'm taking Lazuly.
Leena: Hm? (she frowns).....hmmph. Serge, you're a real jerk!
Serge: No I'm not a jerk!! What's your problem anyway!
Leena: I wanted to go to the prom with you! It's been my dream for years!
Serge: *frowns* I thought your dream was to become the loving wife of a "lucky man"
Leena:........oh. That too. But I want to go to prom with you!
Lazuly: Maybe I shouldn't go with you, Sergey....
Serge: *frowns* No Lazuly I want to go with you.
Lazuly: I have to go to class....
Serge nods at Laz. Serge: I will call you. Bye
Serge: Leena I'm sorry, but I've wanted to go with lazuly since school started. I have
dreams too..
Leena: Serge, what about US?
Serge: *frowns* Us? We're good friends, Leena. Besides, why don't you go with Norris?
*He sneers* You two are always together anyway, all chummy in my face! I figured you
loved him anyway. *all jealous*
Serge: (thinking to himself) If I don't want Leena, that doesn't mean anyone else can have
her. I'm the most popular boy here and I'm not about to let security boy steal one of my
admirers.
Leena: Serge! Oh! (she runs off crying- Serge has to run to gym class).
Serge: *groans* Oh no.....and to top that off, Norris is on duty right now....*sigh*
If she goes crying to him, I'm toast...
He runs to gym before anything can happen.
Chapter 2: Gym
Serge is running like Jackie Joyner Kersey to gym. But the bell rings- he is late.
Karsh stands at the door.
Karsh: Going somewhere, junior? *he reaches with his massive arm and pulls Serge by
his collar*.
Serge: Umm...*thinks of an excuse*
ImsorryI'mlateIhadtogotothebathroomanditwasfullsoIhadtowaitinlineforafreetoilet..?
Karsh: You could have wet yourself.
Serge: umm....no. Sorry sir. We're not in the 70s.
Karsh: Hmmph. Get inside and change.
Serge: Sir....? *stands by the door*
Karsh: WHAT?
Serge: *Remembering making Leena cry* Umm........if that security guard
Mr. Ishito comes "looking" to speak to me, tell him I went home with diarehha.
Karsh: Hm. Maybe. Now get!
He pushes him in the locker room.
Serge: *goes in then comes out* Umm....sir?
Karsh: WHAT?!
Serge: Umm...Skellyis"clowning"aroundintheshowerandIdon'tlikeitcuzhealwayswatchesmeundress.
Karsh: SHADDUP AND CHANGE! (he shoves him back in).
There is a heavy pounding on the door. Karsh opens it. It is Norris, wearing a gray long
sleeved shirt and matching pants along with black combat boots--school security uniform.
Norris: Excuse me karsh, but I have a warrent to search the gym showers for a "suspect".
He lets himself in. Serge hears Norris and "ulps". He cowers in a corner near Skelly.
Serge: Oh god, don't let him find me...*shivering then sees Skelly and gets an idea*.
Van stands there in his gymsuit-he glances at Norris and adjusts his spectacles.
Norris: You. (points to Van) Why aren't you participating?
Van: Because gym hasn't started yet.
Norris: I am looking for Serge. Where is he.
Van: In the corner.
Serge: *gulping* Van! Geesh...*grabs Skelly* If I remember correctly...Norris is afraid of
clowns...
He grabs Skelly and tosses him out of the corner.
Norris is about to grab Serge when Skelly lands on Norris.
Skelly: *makes a face* (if he can) Waka wak waka (all Fozzy bear style)...nyak nyak nyak!
Norris: *stares horrified at Skelly*.................................................
Norris: *starts screaming like hell and runs around, knocking over Karsh.
Karsh: Norris! You'd better watch it!
Norris grabs the rakes Karsh and Glenn use to shove the kids out and starts
bashing Skelly to the floor, disassembling him.
Norris: DIE CLOWNS DIE DIE DIE DIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!
Skelly: Mr. Karsh......helppp.....waka.......waka....nyak.....
Norris screams and runs out the gym, leaving a big hole in the wall.
Karsh: Ok Time for Gym! Get out there!!
He and Glenn shove them out of the locker room and into the gym with rakes.
Glenn heads into the gym- they are climbing the rope that
day- their gym teacher is about 90 years old so he sits in a chair the whole time
while their student teachers do all of the work.
Serge: *sits in a corner* Say Glenn...ya got a prom date?
Glenn: Who me? Huh. Sure I do. Me and the TV.
Serge: Um...well you're not going to the prom?
Glenn: Not if I get a date.
Serge: *lightens up* Well, why don't you take Leena?
Glenn: Huh? That dog? Woof.
Serge: .........No, Froggy boy, that's Poshul.
Glenn: No. I'm talking about Leena. Come on. It's time to climb the rope. (he
gets up and walks to the rope with Karsh).
Serge: *follows Glenn* Hey don't call my friend a dog!
Karsh: (belting) Today, we do the rope climb. Don't gimme that weenie little "I
can't do it!" crap, either. Kid, you're up first.
Kid: Right.
She gets up and passes by Serge, giving him an icy glare. Leena folds her arms, scowling.
Korcha watches Kid with wide eyes.
Kid: *sneering at Leena on the way too* At least you have security boy Norris...I've got..
*shudder* Korcha.
Serge: Boy, Glenn, did you see that stare she gave me?
Glenn: Huh? Oh. Okay.
Serge: *whispering* You could freeze a slice of beef with that glare...
Zoah: STOP UP SHUT TALKING SERGE AND GLENN *intentional mix up of words here*
Karsh: Kid! You need to hit the bell at the top of the rope. I am timing you!
Kid: Ok sir.
Van folds his arms and looks at the clock.
Korcha: Oh, yeah.....Kid...
Kid is struggling to impress Serge and is about to make it to the top when....
Serge: (out loud) Mr. Karsh, do you have a date for the prom?
Karsh: That is none of your business!!
Kid seethes so bad, her hands "literally" burn the rope to pieces and she falls, right
on top of korcha.
Korcha: Heh. Heh heh. Hey, Kid.
Kid: (screams and starts bashing Korcha) STAY AWAY!!
Serge: But sir it says on the invitations that you are going to be there!
Karsh: I will be the law enforcement! KID! KORCHA! STOP THAT THIS ONCE!
Serge: (still pestering) But sir, I thought Norris was going to be the law enforcement!
Kid whines and bitchslaps Korcha more.
Karsh: Boy, you're asking too many questions. (whispers to him) I've been set up
on a blind date.
Serge: *whispers* Oh really? Who set you up to it?
Karsh: Zoah.
Serge: Oooohhh. Ok! I hope its Leena or kid.
ZOAH: HUSH STOP SHUT UP SERGE *again, intentional word mix ups*
Van: Look at the rope!
All eyes move to the rope it's fallen to the ground-smoking.
SErge: *gets up and walks to the showers* Well I guess that's it for Gym today...
Karsh: Nope! *he grabs Serge by the collar and
yanks him back*
Glenn: We have a back up plan. Pull ups!
Mikki: *finally speaking up* Aww
man.....no one wants to see your undergarments Glenn! Who cares if you wear
diapers still!
Serge: *gulp* Pull ups....? I hate...pull...ups...
Kid: Oiiii no sir! My gym suit doesnt stretch that much!
Minutes later, they are all on pull-up bars, doing pull-ups.
Leena: Unh.......uh....(she is gasping and struggling).....can't we stop?
Skelly, who had re-assembled himself, soon saw his bones began to fall apart.
Kid: *grins* Aww, Leena's too posh to do pull ups...
Korcha: Ah! Kid, how areCHA doing?
Kid uses her legs to kick Korcha in the face.
Van: If you hadn't busted the rope, we wouldn't be doing this.
Kid: *swings on the bar and socks Van's glasses* Shut the bloody hell up!
They land on the ground- he gets off his bar to fetch them.
Karsh: What are you doing OFF THE BAR? Get back up there this instant!
Kid runs back to the bar and knocks Leena off in the process.
Leena: Oh!
She starts to cry and whimper.
Kid: *snickering* Awww poor little baby!
Karsh:(he walks up to Leena) GET BACK UP THERE
Serge: Ooohh boy.....
They scream for a while- Van gets back on his bar and looks at Serge.
Van: What's her problem?
Serge: *shrugs* I dunno. She is mad because I asked Lazzy to the prom. I mean,
can't she go with you or Norris or something?
Van: Not with me...I've got to work the lightboard.
Serge: Oh well....I'm going with Lazzy..
Norris slams the door open with Nikki in his hands.
Norris: Sir Karsh!
Van: Well.....that's fine and all, but....you still have to deal with Kid....(he looks at
Norris.
Karsh: Hush, soldier! (he continues yelling at Leena)...worthless RICH GIRL!
Serge: Uh oh...lets hope Leena isn't crying no more (nods to van)
Norris: Sir Karsh, why are you yelling at her? She's a innocent girl!
Karsh: She fell off the bar!
Nikki: *fidgeting* ........
Karsh: Oh. Nikki! Where did you go?
Nikki: *to himself* Ulp...busted again...I shall succeed tommorow in skipping gym though...
Serge: *whispering to Van* Oooh looks like this is gonna be fun!
Norris: *drops Nikki splat on the floor while Leena cries* Sir Karsh, I believe you are doing
wrong here!
Van: Cover your ears. He's getting the whistle.
Karsh: Shut up for a second. (he blows on his whistle, hard) Nikki, Leena! 2000
pushups! Both of you!
Serge: Uh huh....*stiffles a laugh*
Leena: 2000? But.......(she whimpers)
Norris helps Leena to her feet and growls.
Karsh: It's punishment!
Norris: I don't care if its your underwear! Sir, I will not stand here and let
you do this.
Karsh: You never had problems with it before.
Norris: I do now, sir.
Serge: *rolls his eyes whispering to Van* Dude, how embarrasing for Leena...everyone's
gonna be teasing her about Norris being protective of her...
Van: This is freaking funny.....(he snorts)
Glenn: Eww Van, don't do that. Your throat gets sore. *snorts in some boogers* See?
Karsh: Norris, you bloody idiot! Get out of here!
Norris: I will not sir!
Kid: *sneers* Hey why don't you protect all of us instead of just HER! *snooty*
Glenn: Why don't we all go sit in the bleachers....
Kid: *stamping her feet* Nooo we all deserve a break, not just miss " I wanna be the
perfect wife someday" gal!!!
Glenn: Kid, calm down......
Serge: *whispering to Van* Now you know why I don't go with either to the prom.
Van: I don't blame you....
Everyone files to the bleachers while Norris and Karsh fight.
Norris: *with clenched fists* I will teach you to treat girls with respect!
Karsh: I treat men and women equally!
Norris: There is no need to call her a worthless rich girl! She has feelings too!
(Leena starts to cry).
Serge: Dude...we should make Leena cry more often.
Kid starts yelling again.
Kid: I want a break too!!
Glenn: We're taking a break right now.
Korcha sidles up to Kid.
Kid: GET AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *smacks him across the head*
Korcha: Cha....! I just want to sit by ya!
Norris helps Leena up.
Norris: You ok now?
Leena: (sniffles) Yes....thank you so much...Norris. You're the best...
Nikki: *getting up from the floor makes Kissy noises* ROCKIN'!! LEENA AND NORRIS!
Karsh: (to Nikki) 2000 pushups! NOW!!
Nikki: But...but...my make up will fall off...
Karsh shoves him down with his foot into push-up position.
Norris: *takes her hand* I'll stay here until gym is over if you want me to.
Nikki: *gets up and starts makign kissy noises again* ROCKIN' I LOVE THOSE TWO!
Leena: Oh!! (she walks to the girls locker room, embarassed).
Kid: *throws a tantrum* HOW COME NO ONE LOVES ME ME ME MEME!!!
Korcha frowns.
Serge: *whispers to Van* Dude! Leena better not be seeing a security guard! I
won't allow it!
Van: You won't allow it? The police won't allow it if anyone finds out.
Serge: *peeing in his pants* What??? NO! She is not allowed to see that man! Hmph!
Nikki gets up and tries to run for the door.
Karsh grabs him and slams him to the floor, blowing his whistle.
Nikki: Ughh.....sir..
Karsh: You aren't even past ten!
Serge: *to van* say when is gym gonna be over? I'm starvin'. And I wanna have a
word with Leens over this situation!
Van: About ten minutes.
Nikki: Ughhh...help....
Karsh: Get going, Nikki! If you don't finish 2000 in ten minutes, you'll flunk gym and
I won't let you graduate!
Nikki tries his best with no avail.
Mikki: Oh Nikki!! *gasping* You can make it to 10! You're only on 5 but what the hell!
Norris waits by the ladies room and watches Serge and Van.
Everyone has changed out of their gymsuits- they walk back in the gym where
Nikki struggles.
ZOAH: LUNCHTIME SOON.
Nikki: *huff* *falls down and dies of exhastion.
Mikki: Good going! You made it to 8 pushups!!
Korcha: What's for lunch, Zoah?
ZOAH: ZOAH WILL HAVE CANS OF TUNA...
Serge: Gross...I hate tuna.
ZOAH: ZOAH WILL BE HAVING THE CANS FOR LUNCH, NOT THE TUNA!
Korcha: I do too. But I do know one thing I like.
Serge: Lemme guess...Kid.
Korcha: Kid! Oh....(he sighs)
Kid gags and heads to the ladies room.
Norris puts his arm around Leena, who was sitting by the bench sobbing,
cautiously not to attract attention.
ZOAH: ZOAH WILL HAVE CANS FOR LUNCH.
Mikki: Who cares already...
Korcha: Cans, man? Cha.....
Kid: (to herself) Of course....that's an idea!!
Kid: (to herself) I'll take Norris to the prom to make serge oozing with
jealousy!
Kid walks up to Van.
Van is trying to dig out a quarter someone wedged in a crack in the wall.
Kid: Van....can you....do ...me a little favor?
Van: That depends.
Kid: Can you distract Korcha really quick? Karsh is busy with Nikki so
its all up to you.
Van: If you insist.
Nikki: *getting up again, huffing* Nnnnnniiiiiiiiinneee.....
Mikki: You're al most at 10!!! Oh my NIKKI!
Van digs the quarter out and throws it down the hall- Korcha spies it and runs
after it like a dog.
Serge: *to Van* what-CHA do that for?
Van: Kid asked me to. I don't know the reason, though.
Kid walks up to Norris, while Leena is sitting there. Leena is sniffling.
Kid: *sugary sweet voice* Say Norris....you know about the prom tommorow
right?
Norris nods.
Kid: And I'm sure Leena does too *SMILE*
Norris: *Nods while eyeing karsh*
Leena glares at Kid.
Serge: *to Van* dude...what's Kid up to now
Kid: *smiles, despite the ugly sound of cans being chewed by Zoah*
Mr. Ishito, Norris, will you go with me to the prom?
Leena's jaw drops.
Kid (to herself) Hehehe, make Serge jealous that is...and leave Leena totally
dateless..
Leena makes a fist, shaking.
Norris: *scratches his head* Wow, a student asking me to the prom *chuckles* t
hat's a first! Ah, but then again I am a student myself so...heheh.
Leena: *boiling inside* Oooo! He's LAUGHING with her!!
Nikki: *HUFF* 10!!!
Mikki: Yay, my hero Nikki!! He's so strong...
Karsh: Keep going, buddy.
Zoah: MMM TUNA CANS...*CRUNCH*
The lunch bell rings. Norris gets up.
Leena gets up angrily, runs out of the area and
to lunch.
Norris: Hey Leena!! Oohh darn! I'll give you an answer later, Kid.
He gets up and bolts after Leena.
Serge: Dude...what's going on.
Van: Hm.....it looks like Leena is angry at Kid. But not just because of Kid asking
you....
Serge: Huh? Asking me what! I'm going with Lazzy!
Van: I know. But....did you see how she reacted after Kid asked Norris?
Serge: No. I was too busy watching Zoah eat them cans...Damn, he could seriously give
recycling centers some competition!
Van: This is all rather odd, indeed.....
Serge nods, grabs his things and walks off to the cafeteria.