johnnymnenomic

              JOHNNY MNEMONIC
                                  2 Cheeses

     Characters:

     Johnny: Keanu Reeves as a guy who stores info inside his head      He's a jerk
     Jane: Random Female       Not really in this movie for any reason
     J-Bone: Ice-T      It's Ice-T for gods sake; need I say more
     Takeshi: Bad Dude     Best guy in movie        Has a laser, finger whip
     Preacher: Bad Dude #2      He really doesn't have a reason to be in this movie       Dolph Lundgren
    Ramdom other perople: Also in this movie for no reason

      PLOT

        This movie is about a guy named, you guessed it, Johnny. He's a "mnenmonic" carrier; a guy with
         information plugged into his brain. But he can only have so much or his brain will melt or
         something uncomfortable like that. I bet that you can guess what he does...

         You're right Johnny stupidly dowloads twice as much info as he can safely carry. Just after
         recieving info from some Japanese guys, more Japanese guys break in and kill them. Johnny
         barely escapes. He then runs from the Bad Japanese company dudes around a random futuristic city          where he meets J-Bone and Jane.

         Soon enough Jane and Johnny are being chased around and there is another scene with Johhny
         connecting to the futuristic Internet. The bad thing though, is that those few scenes are the coolest
         in the movie. More running, fighting, and chasing ensues. Jane is infected with the EVIL
         PLAGUE. They go visit a man called spider, who promptly helps them and then dies. But before
         that happens the viewer finds out what they already guessed early on... That Johnny has the cure
         for the EVIL PLAGUE in his head.

         Then comes the semi- entertaining battle thing where most of the good dudes are killed.
         Then for some reason there is a dolphin thing. The preacher guy is electricuted and Takeshi is
          killed. There is a happy ending and the viewer is glad that the movie has ended.

         SFX

          Most of the SFX are pretty good but some are just bad. The internet scenes with all the CGI are
           cool; but aside from that most of the SFX look kind of old. The laser whip is cool, but it looks
           a little lame. I guess that's the best they could do in 1995.

         GORE

           A bunch of random decapitiations throughout the movie
           One guy split diagonally down the middle
           Some gun shot wounds
           Minimal blood spillage
           A nasty corpse or two

            WHAT I LEARNED

           The internet will be a lot cooler in the future
            Even in the future all big companies are evil
            If Keanu Reeves hadn't been in THE MATRIX this movie would have tarnished his carrear
            To not watch movies with Ice-T

           THE BOTTOM LINE

            The bottom line is that JOHNNY MNEMONIC is a very average movie. The only things that
             make it really stand out are Takesh's laser whip and the internet scenes. It does have a cool
             premise. So if you have the time the CHEESE KING gives you his approval to rent it. It does
            make for a good early morning, afternoon time waster. You know, you might like it too.