"Suck on my big 10-inch!"
LOL. That quote's darn funny. Check out the Toys In The Attic review to get some sort of explanation.
- ROCKS
- PUMP
Woohooo! Hold everything! Where did that cool gritty rocking approach run off to? I mean, the guitars sound so... well, goddamn normal. Not filthy, not dirty, not raw, not anything! This is meek stuff! Hate to say it, but Prindle was right as usual. This is worse than the debut. By far. No megahit ballads like "Dream On"? And no radio staples like "Mama Kin"? No trippy excursions into the wast realms of blues? No stomping hard rockers? Aaaaaaargh..... Not much improvement of any kind here, actually. You'd think they took some songwriting lessons after their label damn near dropped when their debut crashed and burned, but no such luck. Most of the songwriting is still clumsy and those songs that are structured well are usually stuffed to death by the luxurious production values. Aerosmith did have one minor hit with this album, though, and it fits in the category above so I guess I shouldn't really complain, but I still can't believe this drivel actually went gold a year after its release. It's dumb innocent fun, I know, but gold? That just ain't right. And who the fuck gave these guys so much cash that they could get a fuckin' brass orchestra to play on their record??? Uhm... well, Bob Ezrin probably did, as he was the executive producer. Which brings me to an interesting point, although his name is listed on the remastered disc I find it hard to believe such an unknown band was backed up by him. Perhaps he was just the producer in charge of the remastering process? I really wouldn't know.
Sadly enough, this album also serves as a faithful preview of their commercial years that were to follow so expect to see some early offsprings of such classy tracks like "Love In An Elevator" running in full flight all over this record. To be more precise, the glorious opener "Same Old Song And Dance" is a bit over packed with horns, saxophones and similar crap so in the midst of all this sleazy overproduction that's going on Aerosmith for a moment successfully turns itself into a blatant rip-off of the Alice Cooper Group. However, the huge sticky riff to "Same Old Song And Dance" is absolutely fabulous, the chorus is hook-filled and Tyler's odd vocals are simply superb. So, that said, with all these breathtaking elements in place it's easy for me to excuse Aerosmith for that momentary lapse of good taste they displayed when they've included that corny sax solo. Elsewhere, the band is still trying to market themselves as a conventional hard rock act thus a couple of not-so-roaring rockers. Nowadays "Lord Of The Thighs" sounds like second-rate synth pop tune, but it was meant to be an ominous rocker, and indeed, the opening licks are kind of creepy but something about Tyler's voice irritates me severely. Well, I suppose I could be convinced it's a rocking song although this generic disco boogie rhythm doesn't entertain me much, and the subtle guitar soloing is screechy, rough and distorted, but in a rather hideous way. Plus, the riff in charge isn't prominent enough to carry out the song. Or maybe it just sucks ass? Probably, as it certainly doesn't kick any of it!
"Spaced" is a trifle better opening with some pointless moody noise and later evolving into a decent heavy rocker which doesn't exactly place the band in the same space rock echelon with the best of Hawkwind's or David Bowie's work, but it ain't bad either, although it does have its number of difficulties like any other Aerosmith number. For starters these sparse piano parts aren't put to any even remotely inspired use and they don't exactly make the track more memorable and for the other, well, this derivative riff isn't that enjoyable. So there. But hey, these are the same guys that made 'Pump' such an artistically accomplished album so they must have known what they were doing here, right? Err... no more comments here. Anyway, then you have "Woman Of The World" which is actually one big steaming pile of acoustic dribblings and self-important guitar solos, but luckily, some of these solos are pretty smooth and I especially enjoy the ones with some bluesier snippets thrown in for good measure. On the downside, it's overlong by at least two minutes and the troll's... err.... I mean, Steven Tyler's screaming is totally obnoxious so in a desperate act of retaliation I usually push the "skip" button on my trusty old stereo and thusly free myself of this horrid track. The fourth sloppy rocker that doesn't rock in a row is named "S.O.S. (Too Bad)" and predictably.... no, no, wait a minute. What's that delightful sound coming out of the speakers? Could it be, oh my... it couldn't... or maybe? Oh my GOD!!!! It is! It's a lovely vocal melody!!! And it's sung by Tyler!!! Well that's certainly cool enough and the riffage is quite decent too. Next up is the awkward cover of the Yardbirds' "Train Kept A Rollin'" which gently reeks of iffy musicianship and is filled with lots of throwaway guitar solos, one sizzling one, and some appropriately fake audience noises. That said, it's obvious I'm not especially satisfied by this rendition since, in my opinion, there's a hefty amount of inane cock rock elements stuffed here that I didn't notice in the original. Worse yet, in the opening part this sounds exactly like some sub-par leftover from 'Kiss Alive!' even if it must be said that Aerosmith did recover some gritty rock 'n' roll excitement in the grand finale, but again, the drum rampant at the very end sounds exactly like Kiss. Other than that, it's as cute as a dozen of pink Duracell rabbits running around. Very lively too. Then you have the band's final nadir, the lifeless, supposedly haunting ballad "Seasons Of Wither" which sounds like a substandard stab at Pink Floyd with Tyler whining and dining all over a bland forgettable melody. Ergh... I've got no use for it, but I gotta say I'm sickened of how terribly overrated it is, since it's vehemently praised in practically every single review of this album I've seen so far. Sure, possibly it's not their worst ballad ever but it's as derivative as it gets. Not as derivative as the closing rocker "Pandora's Box" though, but I don't honestly think this number's so bad as everyone makes it out to be. Well, it does stink like a rotting corpse of some farm animal, and while it certainly doesn't look much better either it's not at all different from other boring rocking excuses that are sprinkled all around this disc, it's just somewhat slower. I mean, what do you expect to get out of such a rabid group of cock rockers like Aerosmith anyway? Deep Purple's "In Rock"? Don't make me laugh. Anyhoo, I can't for the life of me locate a single worthwhile hook in this riffless aggregation of wankery they call a song so I'll rather stop trying. I'm sad to admit it but this has been a pointless rambling review even for my own twisted standards so I'm about to spare myself of further embarrassment. Well, as far as generalizations go, the songwriting is slightly more focused, the songs are refreshingly diverse and they're already trying to market themselves as an all-American band with all the pomp that goes with it, but I'm still forced to consider this a noticeable drawback. It just doesn't feel right. It's sterile. It's slick. It just wont do I'm afraid.
Well, in 1975, the band had their first two albums past - now let's go for the famous third record. And they really make it. I mean, they've captured the attitude, the riffs and the memorability, so what could go wrong? Nothing really did, BTW, maybe except of the fact that the kept increasing their drug-consuming.
Yeah, so this album finally brought them to the state of "America's Greatest Rock Band" - a cliche they're still using. But back then, there were almost no strong rock'n'roll bands in the US, while the UK had overloads of 'em: Zeppelin, Sabbath, Purple, Nazareth, Thin Lizzy, Uriah Heep, Queen... yeah, you see. Gotta love Jimi hendrix, though - that man kicks the shit out of the already shitty Aerosmith! Still, this record is a good one. The opener, "Toys in the Attic", for instance, is a quite punky rock'n'roller with a punchy riff from Perry. His solo also rules, and even the vocals rule - this is really the ultimate punk-rocker! To hell with Sheena! This is one of the four candidates for "best song", by the way.
"Uncle Salty" is a rather relaxed, cool tune, and maybe it's possible to trace some jazz and blues deep below. Heh, I dig the verses. The "Oooh, it's a sunny day outside my window" kinda sucks, though. It's repeated too many times and it really gets on my nerves.
"Adam's Apple" is a Tyler-rocker with a rather forgettable melody. The hooks don't work well enough to make it more than an average song. Hey Steve - why didn't you use that sax a little bit more? Since the Perry/Whitford company doesn't manage to put any memorableness to the song, that little sax could have made it a Bowie-inspired little rocker, which would have been a pretty memorable fact about an Aerosmith song, even if the melody is pretty poor.
"Walk This Way" is a classic, nobody's gonna deny that. The speedy guitar riffs just rule, so does Tyler's rapping, so does the chorus, and so does the bass in the background. As you probably know, they co-worked with Run DMC about ten years later, a cooperation which ended up in a new version of this song, which also rules. The song has a pretty cool history to be told, by the way: Some day when the whole band except for Tyler rehearsed for this song, the rehearsings ended up in a cinema visit. The movie was Young Frankenstein. Somewhere in the movie Igor says 'walk this way', and so the other guy walked the same way with humps and all. The boys in the band told Steven about this, since they thought it was pretty hilarious, and that's the story about the song title. Another funny thing about the song is that a newspaper once had an article about how disgusting rock lyrics are, and so they had the lyrics of "Walk This Way" as the counterpoint - this was how a rock lyric should be. The question is if the article's author had got the meaning of "you ain't seen nothin' till you're down on the muffin'' or not.
"Big Ten Inch Record" is a cover of an old 30's song, originally written by some "F. Weismantel". It's the third aspirant for the place as "best song", 'cos it friggin' rules! It has that rockabilly bass line, those almighty saxes and pretty good vocals. Steven Tyler once said "The big rumour is that I say, 'Suck on my big ten-inch' on the record. I don't. I'm saying 'cep' - as in except - not 'suck.' But no one in the whole world believes me". That's pretty fun, 'cos everything he says IS probably true - especially that "but no one in the whole world believes me".
"Sweet Emotion" has got a pretty gorgeous, soft and generally excellent bass line. I suppose the vocals kinda rule, too, but man, that bass makes the whole song. The hard-rocking part is pretty punchy, too. Hey - this track is ALSO almighty! The fourth of the best songs, and a standard in the Aerosmith catalogue, together with "Walk This Way". Steven wrote the lyrics during a time when he was pretty pissed off with Joe's ex-wife, by the way.
"No More No More" is a pretty generic rock song, but it's a nostalgia-trip and so I'm satisfied.
The music of "Round And Round" is credited to Brad Whitford, and as usual with his songs, it's a flirtation with HM. The melody isn't much of a sensation; it's just some Sabbath-like crunch, but neither Sabbath's melodies were very great, so I suppose the song is kinda equal with Sabbath. Noticable is that Whitford, as usual when dealing with songs of his, plays the lead guitar.
The album closer is the meltin power-ballad "You See Me Crying". I use to hate all of Aerosmith's power-ballads (though I dig both "Dream On" and "Seasons of Wither"), and this one isn't an exception. It's fairly better than the 80's/90's ones, though - you know "Angel", "I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing", "What It Takes" and some tons of others? I get sick of those. "You See Me Crying" is at least pretty accessible, and probably pretty original for the time, but it's an Aerosmith Power Ballad, and therefore I hate it. So there, clear 'nuff??
Summa summarum: If you've got some young chile in yer family who's into today's commercial music and you want the chile to listen at YOUR music, you should give the chile this album and wait for the reaction - I should love it if I got in back in the days when I was seven, and the album's a good gateway into classic rock. Anyways, a must-have for rock fanatics, since it's the best album by America's Greatest Rock Band.
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Yeah, you know how it uses to be when a band feels that they have found out "their own style" (which usually happens when they get their first huge sell-out): They continue producing records in the same vein to keep up the selling. It usually works, too - the difficult thing is to get the first record selling. I think you know about this, other examples are every commercial band today, Fleetwood Mac (Rumours and its whereabouts), Bruce Springsteen (Born In The USA and its follow-ups), Genesis (A Trick Of The Tail and Wind And Wuthering, plus Genesis and everything after that one. It needs to be said that this was after Peter Gabriel left the group), Judas Priest (British Steel, Screaming For Vengeance and everything thereafter), and even King Crimson (In The Court and In The Wake). And, then, Aerosmith and some tons o' others.
And so we got here. This album is kinda poorly produced, it
sounds like a live performance rather than a studio recording. The one who might
be held responsible is Jack Douglas, who has produced almost everything since
Get Your Wings. It's not a disaster, though - it does sound
like a good live performance.
The heaviness which they brought into this album is probably a result of a desire
to not sound wholly as before, even if they were pretty dirty at that time,
too. Or maybe it's just an attempt to keep up with the fashion? Anyways, the
predecessor were much better - I did really like those funny punky Stonesy tunes.
Of course, such tunes are available here too, but not in the same amount, and
neither at the same level.
The album kicks off quite mightily with "Back In The Saddle", which, despite the poor producing, kicks great ass AND is pretty heavy. Tyler's vocals are awesome - the way he screams "I'm baaaack!" really irritates one's vocal cords. The song's got driving bass/drum interplay which keeps the speed during the verses. Joe Perry plays six-string bass, BTW.
"Last Child" is written by Tyler/Whitford, which guarantees a rocker. This one has got a supercool guitar line which would have been almighty with a better production. They played the song live on A Little South Of Sanity, which is pretty poor, but the song is much better presented there. The song kinda rules anyway.
"Rats In The Cellar" sounds like something from Toys In The Attic - it's quite punky, plus it has a cool atmosphere. It's not as good as the title track from the preceding album, but almost. It opens with some wheezy vocals and a pounding instrumentation. The harmonica jam part in the middle rules.
"Combination" is credited to Joe Perry alone, and is an average-speed rocker featuring some pounding guitars. The monotonic vocals adds some Balck Sabbath-ish mood to the song - Steven Tyler really sounds like Ozzy Osbourne would if he had embibed EVEN more drugs.
"Sick As A Dog" is an inoffensive rocker from Tyler/Hamilton - rather poppy here and there, by the way. Come on, guys, Aerosmith are supposed to have some ATTITUDE, ya know. This is far too mainstream.
"Nobody's Fault", though, isn't inoffensive at all! That one's the darn heaviest tune Aerosmith ever might have released! Crunchy guitars and a scary atmosphere almost give this album a gothic touch. The part where Steven sounds like a huge, angry, purring cat is really cool. The song is credited to Tyler/Whitford, and it feels good that one of Whitford's songs are among the best. Aerosmith isn't always about Tyler/Perry.
"Get The Lead Out" is a cool, generic tune. Kind of rules, since it catches a fun, teeanage mood. The intro riff is almighty.
"Lick And A Promise" is another simple, quite generic rocker. Some "naah-naah-naah" gives a hint about how they would sound some ten years later. The song really sounds as if it's coming from Toys, but then it's mostly like "Adam's Apple", which was one of my least favourites from that album.
"Home Tonight" is the power-ballad this time. It's fairly better than "You See Me Crying" from the earlier album, mainly because it's shorter, only about three minutes. Heck, I can accept three minutes of almost any kind of music, so no problem here. Steven's vocals aren't really made for songs like this, though. The way he sings "baaabeeey" just doesn't sound well. Long live "Nobody's Fault"!
And so the short summary: A quite good mid-70's rock album, leaning somewhat on HM. It lacks the catchy hooks of Toys In The Attic, though, or maybe it's just the producer's fault. Strange thing is that it's really the same producer, though, and he really didn't do anything wrong on the previous album. Did ya party too much with the guys, mr. Douglas? Too much drugs, eh?
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At this time they had got their huge comeback within Permanent Vacation, and so they had to produce a follow-up to it. This time, though, they didn't do the same mistake as with Rocks - they aren't doing it heavier than before, plus it's produced by Bruce Fairbairn, not by Jack Douglas. Of course, since Permanent Vacation was such a huge sell-out, they had to pressure to do something really good, but it seems as if they didn't care much about that, maybe they had learned from their mistakes, 'cos this album doesn't at all pretend to be great in any way, and that is where its possible greatness is. They didn't leave their style or anything, just continued as if the sudden comeback was nothing.
The album consists of pretty much filler, but the fillers are all cool little catchy rockers, so that's not any kind of a problem. The last song, though, is the power-ballad of "What It Takes", and that is the only really low point of the album. Many of the songs represent the happy-to-be-rocking attitude which I really like about some of Aerosmith's songs, one extra overall point for that. Otherwise, the album is the typical 80's-90's Aerosmith album, but with some surprises here and there to add to the diversity. Of course, we also have the two huge single-sell-outs, "Love In An Elevator" and "Janie's Got A Gun".
That cover rules, too, as you might know I love everythong with a motor which is 30 years or older. Those trucks really seems to be from the early 40's or maybe the late 30's.
The album kicks off most mightily with "Young Lust", whose pretty generic intro moves over into a punky, speedy rocker with lots of good mood. Heck, it might be the speediest Aerosmith song since "Toys In The Attic" or something! These ol' chaps are supposed to be about 40 at this time, aren't they? This song could have been a hit even during the punk era, believe me. The bass and drums just rules, while the ending drum solo again is quite generic.
"F.I.N.E" is supposed to mean "Fucked Up, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional", and it's really cool sort of rocker, with guitars filling up the background with varying chords and a riff here and there, while Steven gets to bring some kind of melody into the song, which he almost succeeds with. The whole thingio kinda rules.
"Love In An Elevator" is probably the most well-known track on this album, while it actully WAS a huge seller, and even till this day it can be heard now and then in the radio. It's a pretty mainstream, but riffstrong, rock hoopla with a catchy, moody chorus which almost immediately gets into the garden of your mind (to avoid future copyright lawsuits I might add that that was a Blue For Two-quote). Oh, at last; it was really a well-deserved sell-out, this song. They really got everything which the huge public would buy into one song, but without losing the quality, as they used to do with the power-ballads. Alright, the DID fill up the track with some synths, but heck, it's all OK to me.
"Monkey On My Back" is some sort of filler, I suppose, but like "F.I.N.E." it's an original one, even if this one's catchier. I've come to like it a lot. And they DID perform it almost ten years later, on the A Little South Of Sanity tour/album, so I suppose that the tune means something special to the band, or at least to the public.
"Janie's Got A Gun" is a pretty fun tune about the girl Janie, who goes quite mad and "borrows" a gun. I think she shot her dad or something, and got arrested. The verses contain some gunny sounds, and of course the commercial public got it. It doesn't mean much to me, though, even if I did love it once upon a time when Aerosmith was my favourite band and I yet hadn't heard King Crimson or any other almighty prog band. I even wasn't in Beatles at that time, so I suppose I can be excused for my bad taste. Still, I've grown tired of it, that happened prett soon, actually, I suppose those mainstream choruses aren't made for repeated listenings.
"Dulcimer Stomp" is a fun little break, and with its soothing, acoustic tunes it introduces the next track, "The Other Side". Like "Young Lust", "Eat The Rich", "Get A Grip" and other almighty Aerosmith rockers, it was written together with Jim Vallance, which pretty much guarantees a good rocker. This one has real saxes in it, and despite it's quite non-structured character (maybe it's the producer's fault???), it does rule. Exchange Steven Tyler with Phil Lynott and it almost sounds like Thin Lizzy, "Little Darling", you know?
"My Girl" is a simple little rocker, and isn't really anything else than three minutes of a fun rocking filler, both cocky and generic, but not bad.
"Don't Get Mad, Get Even" opens with some weird little noise, which soon are replaced by a humming Steven Tyler and a harmonica, of which the latter soon is replaced by an electric guitar, and this little verse is soon replaced by the bursting chorus, a guitar solo and some vocals, that is. Then comes another verse, and then comes another chorus, but without the guitar solo, and with another, rather rapping vocal line. The third chorus sounds like the first, though. Pretty fun song, BTW.
"Voodoo Medicine Man" is partly credited to Brad Whitford, and so it's a good, heavy little rocker, opening with some weird stone-age rite or something, before the actual song begins with almighty guitars and moody vocals. Hey, gotta love Brad Whitford!
"What It Takes" is YET ANOTHER in the long row of boring power-ballads, used to sell as much as possible. Joe Perry once said that he didn't like when Aerosmith played ballads, and maybe that's why the songs credited to Tyler/Perry usually rocks. Good to have you with them, Joe! You really does save the band sometimes! Anyways, "What It Takes" doesn't sound anything different from any of the other power-ballads of the 84-93 period. They did change the power-ballads somewhat on "Nine Lives", and on that one they at least do sound acceptable, while this track makes me wanna turn off the CD-player, or at least turn on Toys In The Attic.
Briefly: A good - though quite mainstream in places - record. Some of it rules, and if that little guy you gave Toys In The Attic didn't like it, try with this one. Hey, this review hardly took much more than an hour to write! Cool! That must be a new personal record!
Send your you-should-know-what-at-this-time!
They still sound this fresh? I mean, they all gotta be 40+ now, but some rockers on here really kicks ass. Way to go, dudes! A way which is NOT to go, though, is to keep doing those power-ballads - four whole horrible commercial mainstream boring rip-offing - whatever - songs which are only for the big crowd. Can't you ignore the commercial public at least ONCE, guys? You're such an established band that you'll easily sell just as many albums even if they're only made up out of rockers.
By the way, when I once was young (six or seven or so), my best friend Adam had just gotten this one from his dad or something, and he seemed to like it a lot. But when he showed it to me, I didn't wanna listen to it 'cos I thought it was a CD with children's songs, which I had grown away from. At that time, I hadn't recognised the piercing, nor that the tattoo was a tattoo. When I did, I immediately became interested and listened to it. I quite liked it, especially the burp at the end of "Eat The Rich", though it's cut so that it's now at the beginning of the next track, "Get A Grip", which enables you to rewind, listen to the burp, rewind, listen to the burp... Remember, please, that I was about to turn 7 at that time. Anyways, this album has helped me getting into classic rock, and so I suppose I've got quite warm feelings about it, but I think that I've made a fair judgement when I gave it an 11.
The album kicks off with a cool intro, which features a rapping Steven Tyler (never thought about making hip-hop, Steven?), which ends up with an Aerosmith-ish guitar riff and moves over into "Eat The Rich". That one is loud and noisy, has heavy drums, a cool bass line, and during the verses, an awesome guitar line in the background. This one's sort of a semi-classic, and not without reason, 'cos it might be the mightiest Aerosmith song ever! Gotta love it! The chorus has got fun lyrics - "Eat the rich, there's only one thing that they're good for, take one bite now, come back for more" and such. The question is how many millions you've got yourself, guys? Should we chew you up?
"Get A Grip" opens with the burp at the end of "Eat The Rich" and then some heavy drumming. Rules. The rest of the song is also heavy and loud - what, have you guys gotten into HM or what? - and quite rules. Just as the previous on, this one is written by Tyler/Perry plus Jim Vallance, who also has helped with songs like "Young Lust", and maybe that's why all those songs rules so mightily. I think that I've heard something about Vallance and Bryan Adams being friend or collaborators or suomething. Shame then that Bryan Adams doesn't rule as far as much as these tunes by Aerosmith do.
"Fever" is a fun, simple, generic rocker, as usual when something's coming from Tyler/Perry. It's pretty catchy, and hey - it rules. Three songs in a row that rules - wow, that's got to be something of an Aerosmith record!
"Living On The Edge", though, is a power-ballad. I once digged it, but God am I sick of power-ballads today! I suppose this one IS pretty acceptable, though - at least it doesn't sound exactly like the other power-ballads they put out. Some part with some booms and bangs once charmed me, too. I wonder if they're trying to be society-critic or what ('There's something wrong with the world today, don't know what it is' and such lyrics), but the result is just horrible. This one and "Crying" was the biggest singles from this albums, by the way, so I suppose Joe Perry agreed to do 'em because of the money. Now let's chew up the greedy rich people! Yumm!
"Flesh" is cooler, though. Opens with some sort of percussion and some spacey voice and sounds, before it suddenly bursts into a pretty powerful rocker, it seems. But soon it becomes a cool bass-driven rocker and isn't at all as powerful as that little interlude gave the appearance of. The verses rules anyway, while the choruses are pretty loud. Quite cool song, especially a guitar solo during the middle of the track. It seems to end up in a huge crescendo, but suddenly the chorus again bursts into the speakers. This song was sort of the coolest ones I had ever heard when I was 7, remind you.
"Walk On Down" is a song both written and sung by Joe Perry, and now this one rules! Punky choruses and cool singing really makes it! Gotta love geberic rock (hee hee)!
"Shut Up And Dance" is a fun, riffy rocker, darn generic, but heck - it works. This song was a party-track to me when I was younger, and I suppose it still is. It's another semi-classic, BTW.
"Cryin' " is HORRIBLE! Eeew, really disgusting - I'm really gonna gnaw your poor bones, boys!
Gotta love "Gotta Love It", though! It opens with some good guitar lines and Steven shouting 'Psychedelic sandwhich' - pretty cool! The chorus is riffy and generic, but I just gotta love it, while the verses are rather poppy, but works anyway. Cool one.
"Crazy" is another power-ballad, but it has a harmonica and is pretty redneckish, so it's a wee bit better than "Cryin' ", at least.
"Line Up" is credited to Tyler/Perry plus Lenny Kravitz (cool guy), and the cooperation results in another pretty generic, speedy, catchy, er - rocking rocker! I can't help but headbang somewhat, Aerosmith rules as long as they're generic!
"Can't Stop Messin' " is a rather dark, though still not slow, rocker, and that pretty much says it all. Quite heavy, and it rules all along.
"Amazing", then...If something is amazing, it is how the hell they stand doing these disgracing shitloads! Gotta be the money, eh? Yumm...
The real album closer is "Boogie Man", a soft instrumental which rules. Especially the part where Tom Hamilton plays the wrong note!
And briefly, then: this one should be at least a 12 if those power-ballads weren't there. The other songs might be generic but man do they rule! Almost every one of 'em! I don't think it would have been more than a 12 anyway, but a 12 nevertheless, and probably Aerosmith's best album ever. Oh, and again I recommend you to get your silly little brother this album, 'cos he "gotta love it". Yumm...
Yeah, Get A Grip was a much funnier album, since it had tunes like "Gotta Love It", "Shut Up And Dance" and "Line Up", while this album has got...what - "Crash"? "Hole In My Soul"? It seems as if they're trying to leave the happy-rocking attitude of the earlier 80's and 90's albums behind, in order to become a balladeering HM band. C'mon guys - why lose your face? I LIKED your previous style! What is this - your 90's response to Rocks?
Another interesting thing is that this time around, there's no song by Tyler/Perry alone - this time they always brought up some semi-well-known songwriter to come up with the ideas. The Tyler/Perry songs has always been the trademark of Aerosmith, and now, without 'em... this ain't Aerosmith no more! Of course, all of the songs are well-written, and for once, the power-ballads varies somewhat (even if they still aren't good), and there's some old guys like Richie Supa and Desmond Child, but still...whenever a band's innovative mind is exhausted, they better go and bury themselves instead of continuing as a band performing songs of other's - such careers are for Carpenters and Britney Spears, not for "America's Greatest Rock'n'roll Band"!
Anyways, some of the songs are pretty cool, and among them are the opening titles track. It kicks off with some catscreaming by Steven Tyler, which moves over into a quite punky rocker, even if it's far too loud to be Aerosmith-ish. The chorus is pretty cool, and this Tyler is really really world leading when it comes to screaming. Still, the riffs, which should have been catchy if the song had been on any earlier album, sounds far too noisy for my tastes.
"Falling In Love (Is Hard On the Knees)" is supposed to be a semi-classic, but to me it sounds pretty dull, and any of the rockers on Get A Grip or Pump is better.
"Hole In My Soul" is a 6-minute power-ballad à la "Crazy". It's fairly better than "Cryin'" or "Crazy", though, but it still sucks.
"Taste Of India" is the "Flesh" on this album, since it's meant to be quite dark and atmospheric, but the synthesizers doesn't fit the music, the intro only sounds quite cheesy, and at last; the guys aren't really good at making this kind of songs - it might have worked if Metallica had made it, even if the risk is pretty big that it would only end up in another "Don't Tread On Me", i.e. a pretty poor HM anthem.
"Full Circle" is a cute and catchy little power-ballad, of course pretentious and pompous as hell just to get it out to the great crowd. Heck, I liked this kind of songs when I was 9 or so, but I've grown away from it, and nowadays I can say that this really isn't for the experienced listener.
"Something's Gotta Give" is a heavy bunch of garbage tunes, and even if it's too loud, I can't help but like it somewhat. It sounds like Pearl Jam rather than Aerosmith, though, which might be a positive thing about this album, since almost nothing except for the power-ballads sounds like Aerosmith.
"Ain't That A Bitch" is another ballad, though this time without "power" in front of it. Gotta love Tyler's singing! The choruses are pretty good, while some verses are somewhat too cheesy with some strings which almost makes it a power-ballad after all. Some movements are directly taken from earlier albums, and I can't say that I like the song when all factors are count, let it be power or not.
"The Farm" opens with some little radio tunes like the ones ending up "Amazing", but Steven soon comes in with a scream, and then it becomes another almost HM-ish rocker. I like the choruses a lot, though, especially when some horns are added, and I dig Perry's guitar solo, while it reminds me of the earlier days.
"Crash" is another darn heavy tune opening with some radio noises, becoming a punky rocker. Hey, guys - when did you decide to become a dumb garbage band? I suppose the song kind of rules, but I'm not so sure. Tyler's vocals sounds cheesily twisted, and that touch of garbage punk doesn't sound good to my ears. Again Perry saves the song with a cool guitar solo, though, and it's not bad.
"Kiss Your Past Goodbye" is a power-ballad. It would have sounded cool if the intro had remained through the whole song, though, since the Perry/Tyler interplay is cool, and it might even have sounded as Neil Young if it was more cleverly used. The power-balladeering parts of the song sucks as usual, though.
I suppose everybody has heard "Pink", since it was a huge hit back in '97. Well, it's pretty funny, almost sounds like "Don't Get Mad Get Even" from Pump, and it sounds all OK.
"Falling Off" pretends to be quite like "Walking Down" from Get A Grip or something, but it only sounds dull, and feels like it's a filler. Same goes with "Attitude Adjustment", which pretends to be heavier, though, even if the verses contains a poppy guitar line which is really popular to use in commercial tunes today. "Hey I think you need an attitude adjusment", eh? Should be "Hey I think WE need an attitude adjustment"! This doesn't work, dudes!
"Fallen Angel" is a power-ballad full of clichés, and a part at the end which is supposed to be a quite beautiful jam, but nope - this is 8 minutes of horror to me.
The summary, then: Well, this is a pretty poor rock album totally without the charm and the good mood of the earlier couple of albums, and generally, it sucks. The sleeve paintings are cool, though - check 'em out!
I've got a hole in my soul - please fill it up with your ideas!
This record was released as a result of the band's desire to make a "real" live record - Live Bootleg is supposed to be a bootleg, neh? It was first meant to be called "Five pounds of shit in a four-pound case" or something, I don't remember exactly. Oh, and the band really sounds quite good - Tyler still can scream, even if his voice is slightly lacking intensity, and the band surely sounds like old hands. What's wrong, though, is that out of 21 songs are 8 power-ballads, which is more than one third of the album. Even when I'm only looking at the cover, I can tell that this is gonna be a less-than-good album. A fact, though, is that some of the ballads, especially "Hole In My Soul" sounds much better live than studio, and that's probably why I didn't give the album an 8. As usual when dealing with Aerosmith, the front cover and sleeve RULES! They guys have still got humour! The inlay gotta be the best thing about the whole album! In the liner notes, there's a picture of every post-Rock In A Hard Place album, and some well thought out advertising. Some of the songs really rocks in the all Aerosmith way, i.e. they're funny, riffy and mood-raising, and they are among the best of the record, indeed. Such songs are "Same Old Song And Dance", "Rag Doll", "Last Child", "Monkey On My Back" and "Walk This Way". Of course, the earlier songs sounds quite worse than the originals, but "Mama Kin" is always an awesome little rocker, and "Dream On" is indeed their best power-ballad ever. Err, their ONLY good power-ballad ecept of "Seasons Of Wither". The show opener is "Eat The Rich", which fades in with some cool percussives and the intro of Get A Grip, before the actual song kicks off. It's a good song, and it's not at all destroyed by bad performance or anything. "Love In An Elevator" always rules, be it mainstream or not. "Falling In Love (Is Hard On The Knees)" still doesn't sound any good, while "Same Old Song And Dance" kicks a lot of ass. You're already introduced with"Hole In My Soul", and indeed it sounds better than the studio version. Sounds more alive, or whatever. Still sucks, but still - an improvement is an improvement. "Monkey On My Back" is just the catchy little filler tune which I've come to like a whole lot. "Livin' On the Edge" is horrible as usual, and so is "Cryin'". "Rago Doll" is a cool Aerosmith rocker, though, and I quite love it. But maybe it's just because it's a very pleasant break between a row of three horrible power-ballads. "Angel" is the next song, see, and that one might be the worst of 'em all, together with "Cryin'". "Janie's Got A Gun" sounds no good at all, I even prefer the studio version, which I didn't like in the first place. The first disc ends with "Amazing" (duh). The second disc kicks most mightily with "Back In the Saddle". Tyler's screaming really blows the listener some mile away! The intro is almighty, too - I dig the way Tyler talks to the audience while the music suddenly goes through a crescendo, with Tyler screaming the famous "I'm baaaaack!!!". Gotta love it. "Last Child" is another good ol' tune from Rocks, and it sounds approximately two times as good as it did in the studio - go for 'em old songs, guys! "The Other Side" is also pretty good, only "pretty", though. "Walk On Down" rules, though. Joe Perry rules! It sounds really dirty! "Dream On" is the next tune. It's not as good as it was in the studio, but it still sounds very good, and it's the only power-ballad this time which doesn't drag down the rating. Then comes "Crazy" and disturbs the fine number of tracks they had begun the album with. "Mama Kin" simply rules, though - it's a simple little rocker featuring Tyler in good condition. It doesn't lack because of the fact that it is layed live - it didn't sound flawless in the studio either. Rules anyway! "Walk This Way" is another good ol' rocker, and it sounds funkier than ever! It isn't as speedy as it once was, though. "Dudu (Looks like A Lady)" is the same little public-charmer it used to be, and since it rocks, I like it, even if it does sound pretty cheesy now and then. "What It Takes" is the only bad song on the second disc, besides of "Crazy". It sounds as cheesy as ever, now when it features an a cappella intro by Tyler and all. Briefly: Uh... "Sweet Emotion" still sounds good, though, even if the opening riff has lost its mystical power. The twisted voice sucks, too. At last I might say that this album would be good for at least an 11 if they didn't play any of the damn power-ballads! Why dontcha listen to me, guys? You S.U.C.K. with your power-ballads! They sell, yeah, but I believe that you've already got enough millions in your pockets to be able to make a less commercial album. At least once!!.
First and foremost let me explain why I felt the need to review
this particular Aerosmith album. I was quite frustrated with the constant spitting
on this outing, and since I passionately hated everything the band did before,
I found it hard to believe that this sucks even worse. And guess what? From
all the post-seventies Aerosmith albums I can honestly say this is the only
one that I even remotely like. I can easily understand why Aerosmith fans hate
the living shit out of this, but in my view, this is a decent lil' album. Sure,
so the rockers are shit-driven and the ballads sleazy, but believe it or not,
these sugary ballads here are a helluva more memorable than any of their earlier
junk like "Crying", "Crazy", "Amazing" and whatever.
Yup. They're bland generic balderdash recorded just to empty your wallet, but
like it or not, they're catchy. Of course, the production is impeccably over-the-top
as always and the songwriting has left down the shitbowl a long time ago, but
this formulaic stuff here still got me hooked, which was no easy task considering
that I'm well aware how hideous this band truly is. So what exactly do we have
here? We have whoppin' thirteen tracks blended with pop-metal perfection, and
we have Aerosmith doing the only thing they're merely good at – making millions
on emotionless corny ballads. But they do it with style.
Pointless and meandering like most Aerosmith albums are, this one doesn't step
away from their unique dumb+annoying=successful formula opening with, get this,
a ROCKER. Wow! But fear not, this shameless ditty can do a lot of things to
me (make me vomit or cringe, for example) but it can't rock my ass. There'll
be none of that here, mister! So did anything changed from the band's humble
beginnings? Hmm... no and yes. As for "no" they still stink with fearsome
effectiveness, and as for "yes", well, they're a helluva richer nowadays
so they can actually allow themselves to stink. In the light of these facts
it was with no surprise on my face that I listened to "Beyond Beautiful"
and was instantly rewarded with standing ovations from my stomach. Apparently
this is one of those albums that likes to suck from the very start minimizing
your hopes and dreams even before they could possibly get up. Regardless, as
a musical experience you might say it was tolerable seeing that tracks like
"Outta Your Head" cooked with far more shit than this. "Beyond Beautiful"
possesses a lot of weird instrumental effects and it features strings as well,
but it's really not a better song because of that. I'd lie if I said the chorus
line is completely depraved of hooks but this just sounds too bizarre and I'd
really be more happier with a more retro-styled approach. I know there probably
is some kind of a riff clenched between the overly officious production values
but I simply can't pinpoint it since this wall of diverse electronic+whatever
noises is constantly clobbering me over the head. And those guitar solos blow,
but it's even more surprising that they actually sound like intruders, like
something that shouldn't be in this kind of a rock song.
The title track is definitely an odd one. It's one of those tunes that will
certainly have you shouting "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON???" right away.
Obviously recalling the spirit of "Walk This Way" it cooks with eyebrow-raising
rhythm variations, manic little riffs, bouncy piano lines, scratching sounds
(rap-metal scratching) and even voicing in Jamaican patois, which actually wasn't
a bad step to make. At certain points the drums sound like someone is literally
playing on a thin can, and since the production is overly polished I have no
doubts they wanted that effect, even if I don't quite understand their motives.
Nevertheless, it's a catchy party song even if it is totally untypical for any
rock band. The first single "Jaded" is one of the highlights with its
graceful semi-ballad approach and an unexpected baroque sounding atmosphere
surrounding it. Opening with odd drums it features a rather beautiful melody
and a highly memorable chorus, and the strings that were used are very welcomed
indeed. Okay, there are some sound effects in this song that are of quite unknown
origin to me, but they fit in wonderfully. The first real stinker for many people
was the obvious follow-up to the smash hit "I Don't Want To Miss A Thing".
Quite frankly, I don't mind this cheesy anthemic ballad by the name of "Fly
Away From Here" one bit. I know I should despise it for it represents everything
bad in rock ‘n' roll today with its obnoxious radio-friendly fodder sound, but
damn, it's so effective. Love it or hate it, I see little point in arguing against
its sheer pop brilliance, since it's impossible to resist those sleazy hooks
or its pure pompous feel. When stripped to its basics, it's only an normal power
ballad staple with a uniformed melody and the obligatory overblown chorus completed
with piano and strings, and as just that, it functions perfectly.
Anther one of these bouncy diverse ditties is "Trip Hoppin'", supposedly
a hard rocking number if you exclude a few instruments that shouldn't be in
a such number. Excuse me but I really don't see why a feeble clarinet was necessary
for this tune, and what about that saxophone? Admittedly, they did subdue it,
but was it truly useful for anything except to show the depth of their production
resources? Likewise, they used some horns too, but let me be the first to tell
you they weren't vitally important or irreplaceable. In fact, the only impression
I got from this song that they wanted to stuff as much different things in it
that they soon lost focus and produced what we have here, a bland throwaway
that had potential but was squandered by a bunch of horny wankers. It's sufficient
to say that you'll certainly remember the chorus line "trip hoppin'"
which is repeated for an endless amount of time, but that's about all. "Sunshine"
is a rather neat semi-ballad with a excellent mellow beginning, but as it progresses
further it becomes much less interesting which every single turn. As always,
some strange effects were used throughout, but the song works best in the easy
going romantic passages similar to the intro part, and the noisy ending is kinda
hurtful to my ears. Why the hell didn't they made a simple acoustic ballad out
of it? Even this dumb singer sounded respectable and soulful when it started,
at least until he got the chance to play his favorite role of an operatic screecher
again. Poorly wasted, this is, and truly shameful. Following in its footsteps
is "Under My Skin", just a pile of sickeningly crapful noise, and as
such this badly written rocker doesn't deserve to be remembered or further described.
I'll just say this it hurts my ears much more than any given Sepultura album
would, and that should say enough.
If there is a positive side to the strings-laden ballad "Luv Lies" it
could be the neat harmonica playing, but alas, they haven't put it more in the
forefront as they should. Well, supposedly the melody is original and bearable,
but the chorus lines are performed in the classic overblown manner and the lyrics...
well, they're standard balladeering hogwash. Then there's a nice three-pack
of harder rockers which are equally unconventional and primitive, combined with
blatantly tiresome melodies and dull vocal tricks. That said, "Outta Your
Head", "Drop Dead Gorgeous" and "Light Inside" are virtually
unrecognizable between each other and they're based on pointless throwawayish
riffs, neat or annoying electronic noises and hopelessly similar rhythm patterns
in the vein of "Under My Skin". Basically all those tracks are exactly
the same if we're talking about song structures, although the band tries to
hide it behind the puke-inducing production of horns, strings and suchlike things,
but expectedly fails. Since the band feared they could be confronted for this
sudden sell out to hard rock, and in order to satisfy their trusty female teenage
audience, they've hurried back to the studio and instantly recorded yet another
ballad of epic proportions that isn't named "Fly Away From Here", but
it might as well be considering they've just changed the lyrics and kept everything
else more or less the same. I know you don't really need or care to know this,
but its called "Avant Garden". So there, I've said it. The final track
is entitled "Face" and... ugh... it's another ballad, another wretchedly
brainless and sappy ballad. However, this time it's played acoustically – do
ya see the immense difference? Probably not, but why should you? You're the
damned audience, AND YOU DON'T HAVE THE FRIGGIN' RIGHT TO COMPLAIN. Alas, although
the song is pretty decent it's just a bonus track, which is a different name
for filler, of course.
Final word? You're a fucking moron if you like Aerosmith. Nah, just kidding.
When all is said and done the rockers won't rock you like a hurricane, but they're
mostly listenable enough, albeit annoying. And the ballads? Well, they're regular
gold nuggets in the rough, but you'll have to scrape awfully hard to make them
shine. I wouldn't recommend this to anyone, but if you've agreed with Joel's
reviews so far then you just might like this crap. I personally don't, but loving
Aerosmith is clearly the matter of an acquired taste.
Any comments or reviews to grant us with?