| Sarah I woke up this morning, shaking and sweating, I saw you again. This time you reached for me, "John,". I reach for you but, once again you slip out of reach. It seems everytime you get further away, yet you are still so close. Now I strive to move on but you keep holding on to me. I have paid for my mistakes, over and over. Yet it seems that I can never make up for not being there. What if, what if.... it runs through my head, over and over, as if it was yesterday. But no...it has been so long, so long since I felt your breath on my neck, your lips on my mouth, your hands on my skin.... You make it so hard to let go. Now today I come here, to resolve what long ago happened. It was easier to pretend it never happened. But it did. Why? I dont know why. But I do know that if it were me, where you are I would surely be smiling down on you, protecting you. If I had the chance I would switch places. But my only choice is to move on, without you with me. Though I know that somewhere you will always be with me. You always have been, you always will be. You are what keeps me going, because I know that if you weren't somewhere with me I would have given up long ago. So I come here today, to ask you to let me move on with my life. Let me find the love that we had. Let me feel again. Let me live again. Let me move on with my life. Sarah. In memory of Sarah, forever and always. Written by John Lane Schultz November 1, 1998 |