"Al Heaven": Chapter Twenty - by Char

Disclaimer: This story contains adult material and may not be appropriate for those under 18.

Comments: Send the author an E-mail, or leave a message on the Al Fan Fiction Forum.

Summary: The Juxtaposition of the Dream/Ideal World and the Harsh/Real World

Al�s Bedroom, now Marcy and Jen�s Bedroom�

Marcy turns a 180 calling for Al.

Marcy: Al?

Al: You hear me?

Marcy: Yes! Where are you?

Al: Here.

Marcy: I don�t see you.

Al: Because I�m not alive.

Marcy stares off into space.

Marcy: You� aren�t really here?

Al: Yes I�m here.

Marcy: I�m going crazy.

Al: Marcy. You are many things. Crazy is not one of them.

Marcy: It really is you?

Al: You think I could stay away from you, even in death?

Marcy is paralyzed with emotion. A tear falls.

Marcy: Are you going to stay with me?

Al: I don�t know.

Marcy: I guess I�m not going crazy if my mind can�t even answer that question.

Al: Marcy, you crack me up.

Marcy smiles.

Al: Now, that�s what I came for.

Marcy: What?

Al: To see you smile.

Marcy: I love you Al.

Al: And my love for you crosses the darkest boundary that was ever imagined by man, my love.

Marcy: But I can�t touch you.

Al: You touch me in every way that counts.

Marcy: Oh Al! I want to feel you, to touch you!

Al: I never stopped feeling you Marcy. I think� my soul can�t cross over without being able to disconnect from yours. So� I just won�t. Can you love me this way?

Marcy: You love me just the way I am, so what do you think?

Al: Do you understand the intensity of what I feel for you? � the implications of my ability to come to you this way? Even as I am capable of it, I don�t understand how�

Marcy looks down.

Marcy: But� if this were true, then it would have happened to other people.

Al: What we share is that rare.

Marcy: I guess we never knew how rare. If people only knew�

Al jumps in.

Al: They�d be so happy, they would want to live in our story� to reach toward something that wonderful in their own lives.

Marcy: I would spend my life with you, even like this.

Al: That�s the beauty of it. And because of you, I even GET that. Marcy: Can love transcend reality?

Al: Our love is real. It is alive, even if I�m not. It�s like we created something bigger than ourselves, and it exists in its own right. That is what keeps us connected.

Marcy: Al!

Al: Yes Marcy�

Marcy: I feel you leaving me.

Al: I�ll be back. Nothing can keep me from you.

Marcy: Al!

No response is returned. Marcy gulps and begins to shake. She collapses in pain, and cries on the bed.

Marcy: Please come back. Please�. Please don�t leave me here. I want to be with you.

Marcy sits up and appears to have found courage.

Marcy: I�d go to heaven to find you. Now I know there is something after death. I�ll go to be with you, your true angel. I would do it to be with you, just as you won�t disconnect from me! I love you as you are, as you have loved me.

Al�s spirit fights TPTB in heaven fearing Marcy would do something to join him�.

Al (faintly heard as his voice fades): Don�t worry angel. I can�t stay, but I�ll be back. It�s all I can do to get this message to you.. I�d stay if I could.. I love you� I promise. I will be back.

Marcy: I hear you! If you can still hear me, I�ll be right here, waiting for you.

Al: Don't be scared.

The Garage�

Jen: Al, I wish I could have told you what you meant to me. I couldn�t. It wasn�t right. It wasn�t my place. I loved you enough to respect you, enough to be happy for you, enough to understand what you and Marcy have.

Will: Who are you talking to?

Jen: Sometimes funerals are not the place everyone can say goodbye. Now that I know who Al really was, I think his spirit is here� where music inspires people. Will: Al. I understand that. Hea, you think you are the only one that cries to the heavens?

Jen: You don�t think I�m crazy?

Will: Me? The guy who can�t get out of his head, except long enough to belt out a tune?

Jen: It just feels dorky I guess.

Will: No. You need to let it out, express yourself.

Jen: I�ll walk you to the stage. What are you gonna do?

Will: I wanted to do something in the spirit of the Voice. You�ll see. Jen: Did you speak to Flash?

Will: No.

Jen: Why not?

Will: Not my place� but I�m jealous she came on the stage with you. She has many fans these days, and I�m just one among them.

Jen: So�

Will: If she ever shared a stage with me, I�d want it to be because she wanted to. I�d rather have nothing from her than less than that. The irony is that I would have loved being on a stage with her possibly more than anyone else, but it�s all so pointless to think about what�s fair. Al died, what�s fair in that?

Jen: I don�t get what�s so special about her.

Will: I don�t even understand it myself. I mean, I could sit here and ramble off about reasons, but it doesn�t change the fact that I don�t really know why I�m drawn to her. I know I saw her with her fans at the funeral, and there�s this special quality. She didn�t judge them even while they were being total jerks asking her for autographs when they should have been solemn. She inspired them to focus that energy toward greater things. I can only aspire to having the ability to harness energy that way.� awww man� you know. I don�t want to go there anymore.

Jen: And she�s beautiful?

Will: And so are plenty of other women. Tasha is waiting for me tonight. That woman is amazing. I don�t have anything to offer the woman. My heart is not open, but she enjoys my company, and it�s nice to see her in my audience.

Jen: Janine and Tasha always seem like they are up to no good.

Will smiles wickedly.

Will: Maybe.. cuz� they are?

Jen: They do seem to know how to enjoy life.

Will: And they have great taste in men, I might add.

Will brushes his arm playfully.

Jen: Stop! Seriously though� You believed in Flash long before she was being rushed by mobs, long before anyone ever paid all that much attention to her.

Will: And what does that mean?

Jen: Well, okay, maybe nothing,

Will: So cut me some slack?

Jen: Yeah sure. How bad could it be if it pushed you to finally get your band together?

Will: I�m going on in a couple minutes.

Chaos, Will�s band, performs �Cool to Hate� by The Offspring.

�I hate a lot of things

I hate a lot of people that are lame

I like to hate stuff

Cause then I don�t have to try and make a change

I hate teachers

I hate school

I hate the cheerleaders

And anyone who�s cool

I hate the office

I hate the quad

Don�t wanna learn nothing

I want to be a slob

It�s cool to hate

I don�t like nothing and I like that fine

Yeah I hate everything and I even hate you too

So F## you

I�m always thinking bad

I never have nothing good to say

I�d rather tear things down

Than build them up

It�s easier that way

I hate the jocks

And I hate the geeks

I hate the trendies

But I also hate the freaks

I hate Dr. Martens

And muscle tees

I�m only happy when I�m in misery

It�s cool to hate

Liking something�s just a waste of time

It�s cool to hate

Yeah I hate everything

And I even hate you too

So F### you

I�ll cut you down and give you lip

Being positive is so unhip

I�ll cut you down cuz I�m a fool�

Will (as the band continues with the tune): Now you all know it�s not about the haters, right? The voice took a stand, and we will continue his fight!

Someone in the crowd: The voice lives!

Will: Here�s to Al!

Someone in the crowd: I knew Al! Wish I knew he was the voice!

Will: I knew him. He was my best friend. And he does live...

Someone in the crowd: I taped it all!

Someone else in the crowd: I did too!

Will: And because of you, the voice lives on!

Later that night, at Will�s Place. Marcy is asleep, as Will and Jen recount the events that transpired�

Jen: Marcy should have been there.

Will: She needed to be with Al.

Jen: You think she was sitting her grieving?

Will: Sometimes people need to do that.

Jen: Maybe I should have been here.

Will: That�s not what she wanted. You sensed that. You left it at that. I respect that. A lot better than her fans did at the funeral.

Jen: Big deal.

Will: Jen� c�mere sis.

Will hugs Jen. Jen pulls back afterwards.

Jen: What is that for?

Will: For being cool.

Jen: Huh?

Will: Let�s move to Los Angeles.

Jen: To stay?

Will: With you.

Jen: I need to be here for Marcy.

Will: She has plenty of support. Marcy and Al inspired this entire town.

Jen: What if she�s pregnant?

Will: What if.

Jen: She�d need me.

Will: You want to raise her kid with her� and lest we forget the rest of the good citizens of Waterside�

Jen: It�s all that�s left of Al.

Will: It�s about Al, isn�t it? Always has and always will be, huh? Yeah, you love him so much, you wanted him to be happy with Marcy, but it�s always been about Al for you. When is going to be about YOU Jen?

Jen: But it�s what I want.

Will: I�d raise the kid with her too.

Jen looks at Will quizzically.

Will: Hea, you�re talking to a guy who is jealous of Al for finding what he did with Marcy. She�s an amazing girl.

Jen: You like Marcy?

Will: What difference does that make?

Jen: Point taken.

Will: Are your ready to face who you are?

Jen: What do you mean?

Will: You got on a stage tonight. How did that feel?

Jen: Like something you asked me to try.

Will: I guess I was wrong about you.

Jen: What do you mean?

Will: Haven�t you ever wondered why we don�t seem to fit in? I mean, you�ve always been at the top of everyone�s A-list.. but why do you choose the unbeaten trail? You could have any guy you want, but when you got over Cris, you want Al? You buy a motorcycle, step on that stuck-up girl for Marcy, and don�t wonder what it is about you that makes you real on all those levels?

Jen: I never thought about it.

Will: Al is an artist. That�s a hint.

Jen looks quizzically again.

Will: You didn�t know he was the voice, but you weren�t drawn to him until he became that guy. Sure, you obviously ENJOYED him or you wouldn�t have slept with him three times� no offense intended. The guy sent some signals that your body responded to. But, can you can say it was a coincidence that you got over Cris at the same time you realized how special he is? Do you really think that is what it was about for you?

Jen: He did seem a little pathetic until he didn�t care about me anymore. I thought it was the one that got away, that he became out of my reach. At least I worried that was why. You think I�m attracted to creative people? I mean, Cris is also an artist. Is that your point?

Will: Bingo. Though I don�t think Cris is capable of the energy that Al has, uh, had. But yeah, he had something that people relate to, and it wasn�t until he stepped up that he was really connecting.

Jen looks down.

Jen: Why did he have to leave us?

Will: Don�t let it be for nothing.

Jen: And I�d have to go to Los Angeles to ensure this?

Will: Are you satisfied to be on the sidelines with Marcy and all the good citizens of Waterside who will dote over her baby? Is it his love of his woman, and the baby or his voice? I mean, it is HERS, ya know, and all this assuming she�s pregnant.

Jen: I know she is.

Will: How?

Jen: I just do. You think if I really loved Al I wouldn�t be able to sense that his kid exists?

Will: Okay, if you are cool with that.

Jen: What?

Will: I got an impression too.

Jen: I believe in that sort of thing.

Will: Did you get a rush from singing tonight? How did it feel to share the stage with me? With Flash?

Jen: Like I care about HER, ewwww.

Will: All the same.

Jen: Okay, I don�t even like the girl and there I was, trippin� that I was on stage with someone famous. I�d rather it was Al, the Voice, than� Euwwrika.

Will: Choose.

Jen: Between what?

Will: Al, or yourself.

Jen: I don�t have to.

Will: Yes, you do.

Jen: Whatever.

Will: Why is what I�m saying scaring you? Why are we different from others

Jen? Why are we misfits? Has it ever occurred to you that we don�t belong here in Waterside?

Jen: Huh? I belong here.

Will: My mistake.

Jen: If you have something to say, just say it!

Will: That�s it! Call a spade a spade! It would be one thing if you and Al were together, but you aren�t. That�s not who you ARE! Al had the courage to get on the airwaves and share his heart. You sensed it even as you didn�t know it. THAT is what you love. It�s not MARK! When are you going to GET THAT!?

Jen starts crying.

Jen: I know how I feel!

Will: And you know this because of our great upbringing, I�ll bet! Hea, while you�re at it, why not check in with mom and ask her opinion? Or dad, the man that loved a woman who never gave him what he needed!

Jen: Why are you saying this to me?

Will: I love you enough to tell you the truth. Or is it only Al that will get through to you? He�s not here, sweetheart! I am!

Jen: Not the same.

Will: Obviously.

Jen: Do we have to leave town?

Will: To focus on what you need to?

Jen: And forget that Marcy is still here and that I love her?

Will: That�s what writing is for. You can keep your eye on what happens in this ridiculous town. You can check in, but let it GO!

Jen: And just leave everyone else to take care of Marcy.

Will: The whole town loves her. She�ll be fine, but what about YOU? Okay, what do you think Al would want for you? To cry over him?

Jen: To be happy. To laugh.

Will: Okay, now were getting somewhere. What makes YOU happy? Jen: You are saying the stage?

Will: You tell ME!

Jen: How do you know this?

Will: There�s a story about someone I never finished with Al.

Jen: What?

Will: You think that music called me by name enough to walk away from my job at that law firm? Men who wanted me to turn against everything I value in life? Bottom lines that didn�t care about human value? Women wanting to help my career, and trying to get into my bed?

Jen: You never told me about your life after you passed the bar.

Will: Me and my inspiration� we aren�t in touch, but she told me to look to the stars and she�d always be there, listening to me. That�s why I refer to her as Star.

Jen: Who?

Will: A woman who convinced me I had to be true to myself, and that everything else would work out if I did that. People like me don't do real jobs, and white collars. I don't need absolutes, safety nets... I want each day of my life to be part of a journey toward something greater, and that means taking risks, and reaching for the stars. I want my existence to send reverberations into the universe... positive energy and inspiration.

Jen: You inspire me. It sounds strange though. You think there's really happiness to be found on that road?

Will: Sounds clich�, I know. But Star... she decided she wanted to do something that seemed idiotic. The cards were stacked against her. But pursuing her dreams was her pleasure. And what else is life about?

Jen: Pleasure? Life for the pursuit of pleasure? Sounds familiar. Will, you're beginning to sound like... you know... Isn�t that what our country was based on? The pursuit of pleasure? Should I start singing the national anthem too?

Will: Happiness actually. No one can guarantee anything means anything, so why not? And hea, if supporting Marcy sounds like pleasure to you, then by all means� Besides, how can you really be good to anyone if you aren�t happy?

Jen: I�m just scared.

Will: We all are.






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