American of the Year
Right... third year in a row. We've come a long way, baby. Back when the first MotY i still respected Josh Hartnett... i laugh at myself... i was such an idiot... Josh Hartnett is an assknave. If it weren't for Josh Hartnett i wouldn't have to worry that someday my future husband, Elijah Wood, was going to die of lung cancer because he fricking smokes! And you know who got him hooked? YEah, that's right JOSH HARTNETT. I hate Josh Hartnett... but i digress...
You do know that eventually it had to happen. Tobey Maguire, ladies and... ladies... Damn... i do that every year. Anyway, i don't think we've ever used Tobey. Okay, we used Peter Parker, but that's hardly the same thing. Tobey is certainly NOT the same thing as Peter Parker. For one thing, Peter Parker is not forced to kiss Kirsten Dunst and act like he loves her. ("Do you love me?" "I... dont.") OR is that Jake Gyllenhaal? Ouch... i just pwned Kirsten Dunst... many apologies to Jakey, whom i still respect (more than say the American of the Year that came before him). Anyway, i suppose i'll have to use this example of why you should love Tobey Maguire more than Ben Affleck (as if you didn't already). 1) Tobey makes critically acclaimed movies... because he can actually act. 2) Tobey has not let fame get to his head. He still hangs out with his best friend from when he started out in show business. Namely, Leonardo DiCaprio. 3) Tobey Maguire is 5'8", about the size of a "hobbit", whereas Ben Affleck is about 6'2"... possibly the approximate size of an elf. *shakes head* no contest. :) Besides... i like the name Tobias...
