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Episode 13: The Biggest Liar
Days 24-26

"Is our truce still on?"

"Yeah, it is."

"You take me, and I'll take you."

"Word."

"Tomorrow's challenge will be mine.  Don't sweat it."

The two shadowy figures leave the dark hall again, disappearing back to the rooms from whence they came.  As far as the other two residents know, this meeting never happened.

**********

With four residents left in the house, breakfast is a rather quiet affair the next morning.  Silently, the group sit at the kitchen table; Fox has a plate of toast, Captain Falcon has a bowl of cereal, Yoshi has a waffle, and Bowser merely sits at the table, blinking sleepily over a cup of coffee.

"Three more days, gentlemen," says Fox, at last.

"Yeah," is all that Yoshi can see.

More silence.

"I wonder what the challenge will be today," says Fox, not because he is actually wondering, but just to make some conversation.

"Who knows," replies Captain Falcon, taking a big bite of cereal.  "Mmm!  This stuff's pretty good.  You wanna try some, Fox?"

"Nah, I'm not a cereal person," replies Fox, and Captain Falcon shrugs.

"Suit yourself," he says, turning the box over and dumping its contents into one of his hands before gulping it down.

"You eat your cereal dry?" asks Yoshi, as Bowser and he both join Fox in staring at Falcon.

"It's more nutritious that way, so I hear," explains Captain Falcon, but the others are pretty sure that he's incorrect.

With a shrug, they go back to eating.

**********

Toad arrives around noon for the challenge; behind him, several Toads wheel in mysterious boxes.

"Greetings," says Toad, as the four remaining residents stand.  "I'm sure you're wondering about these boxes; we'll get to those in a moment."

"Drugs," whispers Bowser, pretty sure he's figured out that Toad is part of an illgal smuggling ring of some sort.

"No, Bowser, they aren't.  And perhaps you should try staying off them sometime," responds Toad, glowering at Bowser.

"The only drugs I take are for my bloodpressure!" defends Bowser.  "Because I have...*slight* anger problems I have trouble controlling at times..."

"Here's how this challenge will work," begins Toad.  "I will ask a question with multiple answers; the four of you, seperately, will decide which answer is correct and show it to me via four cards, each with a letter on them.  If you answer correctly, you will be given a chance to decide WHOM of your competitors will be given a plate."

"And what, they have to break it over their head?" asks Fox, sarcastically.

"That player will have to balance the plate on his head," replies Toad.  "You can elect to put your plate on any of the other players.  If you answer incorrectly, you'll miss your chance to place a plate for the round."

"What if they...fall?" asks Captain Falcon, wincing.

"As soon as your plates fall off your head, you're out of the game," answers Toad.  "As the stack of plates on your head gets heavier and taller, it will become harder and harder to keep them centered.  The goal is to stack up plates on all the other players as quickly as possible, so that you can be the last left who has not dropped your plates...if you have any."

"What happens to players who are out?" muses Yoshi, after a moment.

Toad smiles.

"Here's the beauty of this game: players who are out can STILL answer the questions and stack plates.  That means if you single-handedly made one player lose, they can continue their vengence upon you even after their loss, and eventually take YOU do as well.  The best stratagey is to try to be fair about stacking those plates, lest you find yourself under the wrath of your past victims!"

Toad waits for any further questions, but the rules have been rather thorougly explained now.

"Alright, here are your answer cards.  You will be given five seconds after each question to come up with your answer.  Here is the first question."

Toad looks around--the players are ready.

"What company owns Pac-man?  A) Rare, B) SquareEnix, C) Nintendo, or D) Namco."

Seconds pass as the players flip their answers, then reveal them upon Toad's command.

"The answer was D) Namco.  Yoshi, Fox, and Captain Falcon are right," says Toad, as Bowser gapes.

"WHAAAAT?  I could've SWORN Rare owned the little putz by now..."

"Yoshi, who's getting a plate?"

"Fox," answers Yoshi, without blinking.

"Fox, who's getting a plate?"

"My buddy Yoshi, just returning the favor," smirks Fox.

"Falcon?"

"Um....uh....Bowser," fumbles Captain Falcon, as Bowser, Yoshi, and Fox each receive a plate.

"Alright, next question.  In the original Super Mario Brothers for NES, how many lives could Mario get?  A) 10   B) 50   C) 99   D) 100."

Bowser sticks out a tongue through the side of his mouth as he searches for his answer.  Everyone seems rather confident on this one.

"Reveal your answers," commands Toad, and several Cs and a D turn over.

"Frankly, Mario STILL need to get a life," sneers Bowser.

"Not the extra one you gave him--that KILLS him," retorts Toad.  "Yosh, Fox, and Captain Falcon all get to place another plate."

"Fox."

"Yoshi."

"Yoshi?"

"Fox."

"Captain Falcon?"

"D!"

"No, who do you want to put a plate on?"

"Oh....we'll do Bowser again, I guess."

The plates are placed.  The challenge is beginning to grow a little harder for everyone but Captain Falcon.

"Yoshi, Fox, and Bowser each have two plates on their heads.  Next question: which of these buttons was green on the N64 controller?  A) the A button   B) the B button   C) the C buttons  or D) the Z button."

Seconds go by, then the answers are shown.

"The correct answer is the B button," says Toad, as Yoshi lowers his cards disappointedly.  "Fox and Captain Falcon are the only two to get this question right.  Fox?"

Fox leers.

"Shouldn't have started it, pal," he sneers, gesturing for it to be placed on Yoshi's head.

"Captain Falcon?"

Falcon thinks for a moment.

"On Fox's head."

"WHAT?!" yelps Fox, turning in shock and annoyance.

"What?  I told you, I'll win this for us."

"Well, perhaps I don't really WANT to leave my fate hanging in the hands of someone who has yet to win a challenge!"

"Enough!" commands Toad, as the room silences again.  "Next question: how many trophies can be obtained in Super Smash Brothers Melee?   A) 200   B) 250   C) 290   D) 292 "

The answers are revealed. 

"The answer was actually D) 292.  This time, Yoshi was the ONLY one to get it right."

"292?  Since when?" snaps Fox, annoyed.

"There's two extra gift trophies that are currently only able to be unlocked using an Action Replay," explains Toad.  "They add to the other 290 to equal 292."

"Yeah, yeah, I can add."

"Let's return the favor and give Fox a plate," says Yoshi.

"You are sooo dead," grumbles Fox.

"Hey, don't worry about it--it's on me," returns Yoshi, pointing at the plates on his own head.

"Next question: in what month is the North American release of Donkey Konga scheduled for?   A) September  B) October  C) November   D) December ."

The players scramble for an answer, looking somewhat unsure.  Time runs out, and there's some panicked flipping.

"Reveal your answers," says Toad, and the answers turn over.

"I was looking for A) September, and Fox, Yoshi, and Captain Falcon are right," says Toad.

"I hate this game," growls Bowser.

"Fox and Yoshi, are we continuing onwards like normal?"

"Yeah, lay it on him," sneers Fox.

"Ditto," snarles Yoshi.

"Captain Falcon?"

"Let's go with Bowser this time again."

As the next plate is added to Fox, he accidentally lets them slide off the side of his head.  They shatter.

"Fox is out, cries Toad, as Yoshi suddenly collapses under the weight of one more plate and his, too, crack apart.  "YOSHI is out of the challenge, also!  We're down to two!"

"Gah ha ha!  Was the weight too much for you PUNIES?" sneers Bowser, despite having a rather high pile of plates on his head.

"No, my balance is terrible," retorts Yoshi.  "And it looks like your INTELLIGENCE is horrible."

"Guaw?"

"ENOUGH!" cries Toad.  "Next question: what does Sonic the Hedgehog collect in his games?  A) Coins   B) Rings   C) Rupees   D) Bananas."

Even though Yoshi and Fox are out of the round, they are still allowed to answer, so they join Bowser and Captain Falcon in flipping for an answer.

"Time's up.  Reveal your answer!" demands Toad, and the group display their choices.  "The answer was B) Rings, and everyone but Bowser got it right.  Captain Falcon, you have no choice, so it goes on Bowser."

Another plate is added to Bowser's stack, but he yawns mockingly.

"That's right, keep on stacking 'em, whimps!" he jeers.

"Fox?"

"My plate's going on Bowser," says Fox, and Bowser's eyes widen significantly as another plate is set onto his head, making the stack sway uneasily.

"What-....why you little jerk!"

"Yoshi?"

Yoshi pauses, then answers, "it's for Bowser."

Bowser begins to sweat nervously as a third plate in a single turn is placed on his head.  The stack sways wrecklessly, and he desperately attempts to keep his head under the pile.

"Next question-" begins Toad, but he's cut off as Bowser's stack smashes onto the floor.  "...and that is, how's it feel to win your first challenge, Captain Falcon?"

"It feels GREAT!" exclaims Captain Falcon, pleased to have finally won.

"That was CRUEL and UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT!" bellows Bowser, staggering out from the pile of smashed plates.

But Fox thinks secretly to himself as he watches Falcon receive the Power Braceletes for his first time: "why did Yoshi put the plate on Bowser?"

**********

The next morning, Captain Falcon wanders downstairs to the parlor to be greeted by a strange sight; Bowser stomps back and forth across the room, lugging suitcases and bags to the door.  Fox and Yoshi are watching, half-amused and half-concerned.

"Huh....what's going on?" asks Captain Falcon, confused.

"Oh, nothing," snarles Bowser, obviously in a bad mood.  "Nothing that would concern any of YOU worms, anyways..."

"What?" blurts Captain Falcon, completely baffled.

"He's had it with this game," explains Fox, from his seat on the sofa.

"And he's positive he's going to be voted out if he sticks around," finishes Yoshi.

Captain Falcon waits a minute, taking it all in, then turns to Bowser.

"Aww, Bowser, wait-"

"Don't even bother; Yoshi and I have spent the last HOUR trying to stop him," interupts Fox, as Bowser pushes past Falcon with a giant suitcase.

"Bowser, why?" asks Falcon, as Bowser drops the suitcase and returns for his bag.

"Oh, you know me, the villain, the nimwit, the outsider," snaps Bowser.  "I can see my place.  And that's walking out that door in about two hours.  Do you think I LIKE being the meanie constantly?  Do you think I LIKE playing the villain?"

"Well-"

"YES!  OF COURSE I DO!" roars Bowser, shoving Falcon out of his way.  "And THAT'S why this house is no place for me!  The villain NEVER LOSES!"

"...waaait..."

"You think I'd give you bums the HONOR of kicking me out?  NOBODY kicks the Koopa King out of the game--the Koopa King EXCUSES himself from such miniscule matters!" bellows Bowser, slinging the bag over his shoulder and opening the door.

"Bowser-"

"Have fun, you do-gooding chums!  I'M FREEEEEE!"

Letting out his best evil laugh, Bowser turns and kicks an ornate statue beside the door across the room, then stomps outside to go do some of his "fun activities" that he's been deprived of since the beginning of the game.

The residents are in shock, staring at the door and the smashed statue.  There's a long moment of silence.  Then Fox speaks.

"Poor guy...you'd think he was in a prison here or something."


On the next episode of Nintendo Big Brother...
THE FINAL EPISODE HAS ARRIVED!  With three residents remaining, the race grows tight and the prize grows near.  One more eviction awaits, then the final decision will be made; next episode, one of these three residents will become the sole resident of Luigi's Mansion and not only win the million dollar prize, but also the title of the Winner of Nintendo Big Brother.  Will it be the crafty liar, Fox McCloud?  The honest and loyal Yoshi?  The unfortunate, yet kind, Captain Falcon?  Only one will walk away with the prize.  ALL answers will be revealed in the next (and final) episode!
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