Say Hi To Dan!

Let's eavesdrop on an interview conducted by a very famous bearded, balding man behind a desk with lots of blue cards with questions on them...

Name?
"Daniel Naumann."

Nightwatch alias?
"Leo."

Place of origin?
"Nebraska."

Nebraska, eh? Still have all of your teeth and appendages?
"Yup."

Marital status?
"Just got married to a wonderful woman, Kathy. We're the most cutest newlyweds ever!"

Occupation?
"Full-time singer and arranger."

A full-time singer?
"Yes, I perform for nursing homes across the area."

And an arranger?
"Yes, I arrange for many local groups. Check out my site - www.itzanaumann.com."

What about Nightwatch?
"They get the leftovers."

What is your contribution to the group?
"The afformentioned arrangements, wisdom, level-headedness, and general crotchety behavior. Oh, and my AARP card with associated discounts."

Any hobbies or other interests?
"I like to catch early-bird specials and 'Matlock' marathons."

What would you say is your most defining trait?
"..."

Dan? Hello?
"...Oh! Oh, sorry. I kinda drifted off there for a minute. What was the question?"

Nevermind, I think I know the answer...favorite game?
"Skipping around the maypole. Is that dating me?"

No, you're OK with that one. Favorite word?
"Regularity."

Least favorite word?
"Youth."

Occupation you'd most like to attempt, besides your own?
"Guy they do sleep studies on."

Occupation you'd least like to do?
"Anything that would make me shave my goatee. I have a weak chin, you know."

Yes, yes I know. Favorite curse word?
"Consarn it!"

Finally, if Heaven exists, what do you think God will say as you arrive?
"You're late; you were due twenty years ago."

Back, back, back...Gone!