I once took the advice of Dr. Walton, a professor of mine whom I hold in high esteem, and vowed to live with the motivation to “reduce my handicap.” Since the year I met Dr. Walton, I’d say I’ve exceeded my expectations.
When I was a freshman in college, I had so many fresh ideas of what I wanted to do and who I wanted to become. While I had many goals, I was never brave or mature enough to act upon any of my pursuits. I would sit in the shade, contemplating the superhuman I wanted to become, and watching each upperclassman pass me by as they crushed my self-esteem with their style and character so incredibly suave and sophisticated. I would always think, while staring at my inadequate clothes and dull shoes, why can’t I be like that? Why can’t I transform into something so respectable and classy? While on the outside it was clear that my aesthetic presentation was not up to their level, I knew that the real insufficiency was internal. Underdeveloped and juvenile, such reflections would inhibit me from taking the next step that would allow me to grow.
Although immature, my dreams as a freshman were well grounded from my experiences as a high school senior. Being highly intrigued by the developing field of forensic psychology, I received the rare privilege of conducting an intense, sociological study on sixty-three sexual offenders. Spending more than six months reviewing confidential forensic files of these offenders and their victims, while also having the privilege to witness a live forensic evaluation of a sex offender and viewing another on video, I developed a disturbing understanding of the sexual offender, as well as a deep sympathy for their victims. This experience would bring me to the decision that I would live my life dedicated to the cause of keeping sexual predators away from society with efforts to ameliorate the sufferings of sex crime victims.
But, in order to accomplish my dreams, a transformation was necessary, for while my ideas were wildly alive, I was not yet complete as a person. Throughout my college career I would take little steps towards maturity. Through the support and unbreakable love of my parents, and the faith and challenging nature of a bright young man whom I will mostly share my life with, I went from the self-conscious freshman to a confident individual who not only works to “reduce handicap,” but one who seeks challenges, and craves knowledge. Sophomore year, I would take my first step of transformation. I wrote a petition in defense for my professor’s jeopardized teaching position. Now, Dr. Walton is considered a “Visiting Assistant Professor” as opposed to being an adjunct for the past ten years, and has his own office, as opposed to having to share one with two people. Junior year, I founded the Forensics Education Organization, an organization focusing on educating students who are interested in a career in law, law enforcement, forensic psychology or forensic science. That following year I began submitting my political opinions to the university’s student newspaper in the form of cartoons, and the year after I became an official columnist. Senior year I became a resident advisor, responsible for supervising over thirty residents who seek my advice and guidance during their first years of college experience. In the three years since my first, I have transformed into the figure that had once intimidated me: active, poised, bold, and also well dressed. I have transformed from being an inactive, scared student to a one who is no longer afraid to defend her beliefs and others, no longer terrified of leading, and no longer hiding from battles that must be fought.
I spent the majority of my four years here at Virginia Tech planning to use my undergraduate degree in Psychology to enter a clinical forensic psychology Ph.D. program so that I would eventually become a forensic psychologist, one who would research sexual offenders, teach, consult investigations, and support court cases. However, when the attacks on September 11, 2001 occurred, my perspective on my future dramatically changed. I felt a strong urge to become an attorney, and more specifically, a criminal prosecutor. Conducting research on sexual offenders suddenly appeared trivial, answering questions that would possibly be inapplicable to society, and the occupation itself seemed somewhat self-interested and complacent.
I was fortunate enough to not have lost anyone in the September 11th attacks. However, I did lose my sacred sense of security. I remember crying for nights, concerned about the world’s fate, and wondering if I would have enough time on Earth to make a positive impact on society. By the end of the month it was resolved: I would apply to law school to train to become a useful instrument for America’s justice system. I would fight to uphold truth and justice in a world that was reaching its climax, in a generation that had been sleeping and then awoken by the loud hatred of antisocial, international and national predators.
My interest in forensic psychology and my strong compassion for victims of violent crimes have not died; rather, they have strengthened. The end-goal remains the same; the means to get there have changed. If I become accepted into your program, you will be promised a very focused law student, one who is malleable to the teachings of your professors, yet rigorously concentrated on criminal justice, corrections, victim/children advocacy, and bringing together the benefits of psychology and law.