Scene: Frolicking Field, Kitchen, Mitch�s, A White house, Back yard
Characters: Stalin (S), Italian Chef (IC), Little Jimmy (LJ), Lady (L), King Mitch (KM), Squirrel Friend (SF), Goaty (G), Hitler (H), Mussolini (M), Dubya (D), Babs (B), Osama Bin Laden (OBL), Saddam Hussein (SH), Fidel Castro (FC), Chuck (HB), Penelope Chicken (PC)
*Scene cuts from the people to Stalin, The Italian Chef, and Little Jimmy*
S: *Sitting in a cage in the sandbox of doom calls out in search* Hello?
IC: *Stuck here also* Well Hi!
S: No, not you! I need someone to help us�some one not in this cage�cage of DOOM!
LJ: *Smacks Italian Chef* Yeah you fool!
IC: I aint no fool! *Time passes and he laughs out of nowhere* That�s a goodin�
*All are confused*
S: You�re a moron you know that Mr. Italian Chef!?
IC: I know�*Sits there with a smile on his face*
L: *Starts to walk by* Oh look a sand box�it seems so boxy�
S: Excuse me, could you help us out of here!
IC: *Starts to scream like a lunatic* THE BEES!�they are coming�*Screams more* Watch out!
L: Bees? *Screams and runs away*
S: *Smacks him* There are no bee�s
IC: It was a dream�
S: You were awake!
IC: Well I�m a moron, you know that!
S: *Nods* You sure are
KM: *Comes a strolling by whistling and sees a squirrel* OH! Hi there!
S: Hi Mitch! Will you help us out of this here sandbox? You see we are stuck in it�and no one else would help us! There was this lady, but the Italian Chef scared her away, with his talk of bees�*Glares at the Italian Chef. He sits and smiles*
KM: I was talking to the squirrel. *The squirrel squeaks with glee and laughs in their faces* That�s right squirrel friend! *Squeak* Yeah! Lets be best friends forever!
FC: *Happy* Squeak *Points and laughs at others*
*They start to spin around, because of their newly found friendship and then start to walk away*
S: *Panicky* Uh�uh if you um help us out, I�ll uhm take you with us into the�*Searching for an answer* the�*Finds an answer* the future!�yeah that�s it the future *Moves his hands mystically* FUTURE! Oooo, OOOO, OOOOO!
KM: *Turns to them* The�*Walks back to them* the future!?
S: Yes, the future!
SF: Squeak?
S: YES! The FUTURE!
LJ: The future?
S: YES! The freaking future! *The Italian Chef starts to speak but is smacked* Yep, the future.
KM: Okay I think I�ll help you! *Unlocks the cage and then lends out a helping hand*
S: *Takes it and is out* Yes now I will go build a time machine, to take you to the future!
IC: The future?
S: *Smacks him* Your not allowed to speak for a while�you hear me?
IC: *Nods and rubs his cheek in pain*
KM: Yay! Future!
SF: Squeak!
S: *Walks off to �work� on the time machine*
LJ: *Awkward silence* Um *Digs the toe of his shoe into the ground* How about that weather?
KM: Oh it�s dandy
SF: *Agreeing* Squeak!
IC: Uh you want I to make you some waffles?
SF: SQUEAK!
IC: Sounds good�*Stands there just looking at the people*
KM: Well?
IC: What? Stop pestering me! You pester-ers!
SF: SQUEAK! *Cough* Oh s�cuse me�
LJ: *Gasps* It can TALK!?
SF: A der, now make us waffles�Mr. Uh what�s yo name?
IC: Jeff�Jeff Chef, from Italy!
KM: Jeff? That�s not an Italian name!
IC: My parents were drunks�
KM: Oh that explains a lot�a whole lot. AND I MEAN A WHOLE, WHOLE LOT!
IC: We get it!
LJ: I don�t�*Scratches his head*
IC: That�s cause your dumb�
LJ: Ow, you cut me real deep just now�
IC: I�m sorry�
SF: Okay, Jeff�make us WAFFLES!
IC: Oh yeah�the waffles *Chuckles*�FOLLOW ME! *All follow him to a kitchen* So who wants some waffles?
SF: *Hops around* I DO! I DO!
LJ: *Gasps* It talks!
SF: *Smacks him* Weren�t you told to stop talking?
LJ: No that was the chef�I mean Jeff.
SF: Oh right�I forget sometimes.
LJ: It�s okay�we all do at times. Like in school, lots of people forget things there�*Enter Stalin
S: Yeah�moving on�
KM: I still do *Hops around giddily* I STILL DO!
S: You still do what?
KM: Want waffles�when did you get here?
S: A second ago�when did you get here?
KM: Earlier�
S: Then were even!
KM: *Nods* I want waffles now!
IC: Well I see we all want waffles! So I think I�ll just�*Crazily and said as if effecting some kind of plan* NOW JOE! NOW! *W is long and drawn out*
*Mitch turns crazily to see what is going on, and confetti is thrown in the air and cake is served*
LJ: OH CAKE! *Eats some*
KM: I�m confused, why are we celebrating nothing?
S: It�s your birthday!
KM: Uh, no it�s not�I think I�d remember my own birthday
S: Yes it is! It says so in this brochure. *Shows Mitch the brochure*
KM: Oh would you look at that, my birthday IS today�I am SHOCKED�
LJ: Now who wants to play Pin-the-knife-on-Hitler?
S: *Jumps around raising his arm* I do, I do! Oh oh oh! PICK ME! Me I say! Meeee!
LJ: Alright Jeff, come on down!
S: But�I, *Is saddened* I wanted to go *Pouts*
LJ: Maybe next time cause Jeff really wants to go now�
IC: No I don�t
LJ: *Hissing back* Yes you do! Fool!
IC: *Frightened* Oh�okay *Approaches and suits up* Okay I am ready! *Starts to walk forward and pins the knife on Stalin. Jumps around happily* I got it! I got it!
KM: *Whispering to Squirrel Friend* Why did he need to suit up for that?
SF: *Whispering back* I don�t know, but look a fights a brewing�lets watch!
KM: Okay!
S: Take off your blindfold
IC: I don�t wanna! You can�t make me!
S: I SAID take it OFF!
IC: And I SAID NO!
LJ: Okay Jeff time to de-blindfold! And you will get some more cake!
IC: Okay! *Shocked* Oh, My bad Stalin.
S: I just wanted you to see your mistake.
IC: Yes, I do want steak�and my cake. *Looks at Jimmy and Jimmy hands him cake* CAKE!
S: No, no, no I said mis�
LJ: Steak? STEAK! Oh I want some! How about you Mitch and how about you squirrel friend?
KM: I want some STEAK too!
SF: Hey me too!
LJ: *Gasp* It talks!?
SF: *Smacks him* How many times do we have to go through this?
S: Apparently many�but sometimes we just put a mussel on him and it�s all good!
SF: I wish we had a mussel *Little Jimmy raises him finger to talk but is smacked* Yes I can talk�we have to get over this okay?
LJ: Okay. I love you Squirrel Friend!
SF: And I love WALNUTS! *Squeak and eats some walnuts he had in his fur*
LJ: But�I�
KM: OH! You been shut down by a squirrel!
*All laugh at his expense*
SF: *Hops up on Mitch�s shoulder* Anyhow, lets get that steak now!
S: There was never any steak�I said mistake. And some one thought I said steak, but I really didn�t.
KM: But�it�s my birthday!
S: I ount cur!
KM: And now I�ll cry if I want to! *Mitch turns and runs into the meat freezer and cries*
S: *Knocks* Mitch, come out.
KM: NO! *Sees steak* OH LOOK STEAK! *Both eat some steak*
LJ: Steak?
SF: *Mouth full of cold hard steak* STEAK!
IC: YAY! Well for both of you. Not for us cause we are steak-less. But you oh boy are you two lucky I will dance for you *Dances*
KM: Oh boy is this steak tasty, I wish you all could eat some�
IC: *Looks at the ground* Oh a BATON! *Picks it up and holds it close to his heart* Well if you want us to have some then just open the door and we�ll come join you and your steak�
KM: *Spazzy* NO! It�s my steak, and you can never have a bite of it *Laughs evilly in their steak-less faces*
SF: *Laughing which sound like squeaks* No steak for you! *Laughs more*
LJ: *Enters* We can�t have steak huh? *Smacks him* How dare you!? You�you butt sniffer!
KM: *Is shocked* I am certainly NOT!
LJ: Oh I think so!
SF: *Jumps off of Mitch�s shoulder and bites Jimmy*
LJ: OW! Get this thing off of me! *Throws the squirrel to the ground*
KM: *Picks up Squirrel friend* Squirrel friend are you okay? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!? *Holds Squirrel friend to try and heal his pain*
IC: *Holding a baton. Gasps* Jimmy! *Throws down his baton and storms off*
S: No! Come back *Turns to Jimmy*�what have you done? You ignorant FOOL! *Walks off slowly*
KM: Way to go, now you�ve done it!�You�ve physically hurt my best pal, and emotionally hurt another pal of mine�what else could you possibly do?
LJ: Now say it!
KM: *Confused* It�
LJ: *Smirks and starts to laugh* You said do it! It wasn�t all together but you said it!�*Laughs more*
KM: Um�quiet you.
LJ: I don�t need this from you, I have enough on my plate�*Shows Mitch his plate* SEE?
KM: I do see! But you don�t have steak! *Laughs at him*
LJ: But�*Whines* I want some!
KM: Well you�ll have to pry it from my cold dead steak filled hand.
LJ: That can be arranged�*Dramatic music*
*Stalin and Jeff come back in*
IC: Oh look a baton! *Picks up his baton again*�It�s so perrty�it has sparkles! *Smiles and strokes the baton* I love you baton�*Strokes it more* Love you much
S: But�oh never mind, *Turns to Mitch and Little Jimmy* now I calmed him down so you better not mention any thing to make him storm off.
LJ: Okay! This is off topic but I think you should know that I�m thinking about going to my grandma�s later�any of you want to come?
IC: Why do you have to taunt me with your grandma havings! *Throws down his baton again and storms off. Talking to himself* Everyone�s always like, I have a grandma! And then they laugh at me�they laugh! *Is upset more. And keeps storming off*
S: I�m going to have a talk with you *Points to Little Jimmy* later�*Glares viciously* now I have to go comfort him again, because you don�t care for others feelings! *Storms off to get Jeff*
LJ: Everything I do is a lie�
KM: *Chuckles* Oh no, it�s everything you do is wrong!
LJ: *Is sad* Well that too�
KM: *Realizes* You�ve been lying to us? About what Jimmy? What ever could it be?
LJ: Well�I um, *Whispers* I don�t really hate Hitler�
KM: *Gasps then Shouts* WHAT!? YOU DON�T HATE HITLER!?
LJ: *Tries to calm his voice by doing the hand things* SHH! Not so loud, I just needed some friends. This seemed like the perfect way to get some.
KM: Well I don�t hate Hitler neither, I actually am in love with him.
SF: *Starts to wake*
LJ: WHAT!? Why is everyone so attracted to Hitler? Are you even gay?
KM: No, it�s a man crush.
LJ: Uhm, yeah well your creeping me out.
KM: Well together we can stop these people from going in time and hurting Hitler�we don�t want that do we?
LJ: I sure don�t want that. Cause then Hitler would be hurt�and that�s just wrong, like hurting a puppy or a talking goat�or eating pickles�
KM: *Nods* Exactly like that! Pickles are gross and WRONG! I hear they give you herpies
LJ: I know, darn pickles�but I don�t want my evil friends to know�then they would think I like Hitler�
KM: Uh you do�
LJ: Yeah well I don�t need this from you right now okay?
KM: Alright but you brought it upon yourself mister!
LJ: Blah Blah Blah is all I ever hear from you, do you ever say anything worth while? HUH!? DO YOU!?
KM: *Ignores his questions* You know what?
LJ: *Snooty* What?
KM: *Yells* Oh Jeff and Stalin�
LJ: HEY! Your not answering the you know what! Your just calling in people�
KM: *To Jimmy* Quiet! *Yelling to Stalin and Jeff* Could you come in here. I have news from Jimmy about his feelings for Hitler!
LJ: Oh I get it now�*Realizes. Gasps* NO! You wouldn�t *Begging* Please don�t, I�ll do anything�*Drops to his knees and clasping his hands shaking them in a begging fashion* PLEASE! ANYTHING!
KM: Okay I wont tell them, make something up then�something smart and good!
*Stalin and Jeff run in*
S: What was the news that you have to tell us Jimmy?
LJ: *Glances at Mitch and Mitch gives him the nod* Uhm, well I say you strike back at Hitler! You know�beat him up good. Or something�
IC: That sounds *Slight pause* GREAT!
LJ: *Smiles* I knew it would�*Mitch glares. He stops smiling*
S: Come on Jeff lets go plan this striking back! Hey we can do it when we take Mitch into the future!
IC: YEAH!
SF: WAIT! *They wait*
LJ: It can talk!?
SF: Hey you lean in close I have a secret! *Jimmy leans in*
LJ: What is it? *Squirrel friend smacks him* OW! You little�*Goes in for the hurting of the squirrel*
KM: *Stops him* Uh uh!
LJ: *Is saddened* But he smacked me!
KM: Lets be the bigger person here okay?
LJ: OKAY! That will be easy cause I am already taller than him, so really I already won!
KM: *Sighs* Just stop talking�
S: HEY! What do you want? You got us all waiting here for you�
SF: Oh, I wasn�t talking to you�sorry
IC: Oh-kay. Now we leave!
*Walk out talking of their plans*
KM: *Smacks the back of Jimmy�s head* You moron! Now they are going to hurt Hitler!
LJ: Well I didn�t know what to do�I panicked! What would you do!?
KM: Well I wouldn�t tell them to strike back at some one that is my friend�that�s what!
LJ: Oh sure blame it all on me�
KM: *Yelling* It�s your fault they are planning it!
LJ: *Sigh of anger* I am going to be in my trailer! *Starts to stomp off*
KM: You don�t have a trailer�*Jimmy stops and turns*
LJ: Well then I am going to go buy a trailer, so that I can be in it! *Stomps off*
KM: Hmf�what am I going to do?
SF: About what?
KM: Everything�
SF: You could get an RV�they fix everything!
KM: An RV that can travel through time?
SF: YEAH! It will be the best, we can play cards and sit on couches while in motion�and make popcorn and�
KM: *Stops him* Yes we can do many things�If we go forward in time�you can meet Penelope, the chicken!
SF: *Gasps* I always wanted to meet a chicken�*Imagines*
*His little dream of them both running up to each other in a field to hug, then cuts to them getting married and having little chicken and squirrel babies, then cuts to them getting old and dying*
SF: Wow�what a dream that would be!
KM: Yeah it was magical, and then you could meet the great Hitler! We could sip coco, and eat Osama�s grand ole brownies�and oh the times we would have!
SF: *Is in awe* My word�brownies, coco, would their be marsh mellow squares�and great music?
KM: I bet their would be�I bet�
*We hear the beep beep of a car or some other vehicle*
SF: What was that?
*Little Jimmy runs in all excited and what not*
LJ: GUYS! I bought a trailer�well actually it�s a RV! You know you can play cards in it and sit on couches and make food, and sometimes people live in them. When I went to the dealership I just wanted a trailer, but when I was forced by the sales man to get an RV well I was excited about it�in a forced sorta way.
KM: So you like the RV?
LJ: Darn tootin I do! *Looks out a window*
KM: I have an idea! It�s the best idea in the whole wide world too!
SF: What is it boss? *Chuckles* Oh that sounds odd, calling you boss�what is it?
KM: We could use Jimmy�s RV to go in time and be with Hitler!
LJ: *Turns* What are you two talking about?
SF: Weren�t you listening?
LJ: No, I saw this flock of birds and it was so captivating�
KM: We are going to use your RV for time travel to visit Hitler!
LJ: Well okay! You know they told me that it has a time travel machine built right into it!
KM: Convenient!
SF: It sounds like the dream boat of all RV�s!
LJ: It�s an RV, not a boat�
SF: I know�I said it was, well what I meant was that it�s a grand RV.
LJ: Oh it is! I think it even has a coffee maker�
KM: A COFFEE MAKER!?
LJ: That�s what I said�
SF: Some people just like to clarify!
*Stalin and Jeff walk in with a poster board and a laser pointer*
S: Clarify what?
LJ: My RV slash coffee maker�*Gasps* What are you doing here?
S: Uhm I live here�
KM: No you don�t, were in a kitchen�
IC: WELL I LIVE HERE!
SF: Now that I can understand�
S: Yeah�it�s more pliable�to our situation
KM: Yeah, lets try and talk in full sentences Stalin.
S: I�ll try, but it�s hard when I concentrate on it�you know?
*All nod*
KM: Lets go back to my place�
All: OKAY!
KM: Wait, what�s with the poster board?
S: It�s just a little diagram about tying your shoes. For JEFF! Italians you see they don�t wear laced up shoes.
KM: Ohh�did it work?
S: Indeed it did
*Drive back to Mitch�s*
S: *Realizes Jimmy�s comment from earlier* WAIT! You have an RV? And it makes coffee? Where is this machine of magical wonder?
LJ: I�*Panicky* I lost it! Yeah that�s it I lost it�whoopsie!
S: Uhm, I see it parked in the drive way�and we drove here
LJ: NO! We didn�t it�s was all an illusion�and if you look over here for 10 minutes while I go outside and make the illusion go away it wont be there!
IC: Oh, I�d love to see this!
LJ: Okay�here I go. Now all you turn around.
All: Okay! *And they all turn and close their eyes* We�re ready! Do your magic, magic man!
LJ: *Runs outside and we hear the RV start and pull away. The he comes running back in* There! Now it�s gone. Even take a peek!
S: *Opens his eye*�Now it�s in the backyard
LJ: *Sighs* It�s an illusion! You see nothing!
SF: *Playing along* I don�t see an RV�I see a Mitch, but no RV.
KM: *Playing along too* I see nothing�except steak! *Dives down to get some steak on the floor* It�s still good! *Munches*
IC: But I see it�and so does Stalin�
LJ: That�s cause I put a spell on you, you think your seeing RV�s�but really your not.
S: Oh, that�s a good trick Jimmy�
LJ: Isn�t it?
S: It is!
LJ: I know�
S: Me too!
KM: I�d hate to break up this intelligent conversation, but what are we supposed to be doing right now?
LJ: I have to go to the bathroom *Walks to the bathroom*
SF: At one point we were going to have Jeff make us some delicious waffles�that would fill our empty cold stomach�s with glorified waffles steaming with goodness.
IC: I sure was, but then it was time to celebrate Mitch�s birthday! *Walks off to get the presents*
KM: *Gasps* It�s my birthday! I forgot, again!
SF: It�s present time!
KM: Hoorah! I am so very excited right now you all have no idea!
S: I have an inkling!
KM: *Spazing* LIES!
IC: *Walks in with many boxes of presents. Sets them down* Well here you go Mitch they are all here!
KM: YAY! *Walks over and sits on a couch*
SF: *Picks up his present to Mitch* HERE! *Gives him the present* It�s from me! Open it OPEN IT!
KM: OKAY! *Smiles and tears it open* It�s a *Smile is whipped off his face* tie�*Drops down. Faking his happy ness* I love it! Thanks squirrel friend!
SF: There�s more!
KM: *Unenthusiastic* Whoop-dee-doo! *Takes out a pair of matching socks* Oh socks, I love them�they�re so *Pauses* black.
SF: *Nods his head excitedly* I know how much you love black! So I got you a black tie and matching socks *Smiles nice and big*
KM: Oh well I love them�*Sets them down* Okay! Who�s next in this gift train of GIFTS!?
S: ME! ME! PICK ME!
KM: Okay, *Stalin stands* give me your present Jeff *Stalin stops in his tracks. Shocked*
IC: Walks over with a big box and sets it in Mitch�s lap* Hurry and open it! It took forever to pick out but I thought you�d LOVE it!
KM: *Opens the big box to find a card sitting in the bottom* Oh it�s a card�
IC: Well, open it up!
KM: Oh I will! *He opens it and reads aloud* Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, not like you, you evil whore�*Jeff starts to laugh in the back round. Mitch fakes a laugh* Hey Mitch, I hope you like the card�it took forever to find the perfect one, happy birthday! *Stops reading* And look, there�s a quarter in it�boy socks, a tie, and a quarter�
IC: Don�t forget the hilarious card!
KM: Oh I didn�t�it�s all up here *Points to his head*
S: NOW IT�S MY TURN! *Stalin hands him a box* Hurry open it, I can�t wait to see your face!
KM: *Opens it and his face lights up* Oh Stalin you shouldn�t have!
S: Oh but I didn�t�
KM: *Upset* What?
S: Just kidding! I got you a car! That travels back and forward in time!
KM: *Gasps* REALLY!?
S: No�
KM: But that�s so evil�
S: *Blushes* I know! I had to get back on the evil train�
LJ: *Bathroom door busts open* AH! My business is done! *Walks into the main room area* What are you all doing out here?
KM: Giving me my birthday presents!
LJ: Oh *Nervous* let me go get mine�*Runs into the closet and comes out with a tennis racket* here you go!
KM: Uhm hat�s my tennis racket�you forgot didn�t you?
LJ: Yeah I did�
KM: *Shocked* Oh�I didn�t think you�d come right out and say it like that�uhm I�m sorta speechless now�
LJ: Oh well in that case�have a mint *Hands him a mint*
KM: What am I supposed to do with this?
LJ: Put it in your mouth and suck on it till your breath is minty fresh!
KM: Oh, well this is new to me�I think I shall try it! *Pops in the minty* Oh, this is minty�
LJ: SEE! I told you it would be a grand time of minty freshness!
KM: You sure did and I wasn�t let down, like I was with some of these other gifts, *Glares at everyone else*
IC: WHAT!? You got a quarter and a funny card! Is there anything else I could do? Cause if so I�d LOOOVE to know!
KM: The joke wasn�t funny it hurt my feelers�MY FEELERS!
IC: *Gasps in horror* Your? Your feelers? My god what have I done?
KM: You hurt my feelers!
IC: I know, it was rhetorical�I ask a lot of those types of questions�
KM: I�ve grown to see, and love this about you!
IC: *Smiles* Oh come here you big pal of mine *They hug in happy hugging times*
SF: I want a hug, do me next!
LJ: *Laughs hysterically* You said do me!
SF *Chuckles* Oh I did didn�t I? *Laughs more* Oh Jimmy you�re a funny kid�
S: So when are we visiting Hitler?
KM: In time�and where�s my time machine you was making?
S: Oh�I was just trying to get you to help me out of that cage
LJ: I have an RV that can travel through time and it has been tested�we will use that!
IC: You said you had no RV!
LJ: I fibbed�
S: Oh alright�as long as it wasn�t a lie, cause lies are BAD!
KM: I KNOW! Just like Josiah Peterham!
S: I wasn�t talking to you�
KM: It�s my birthday darn it!
IC: He doesn�t seem to care�
KM: But that�s�*Tears up*�Hold me Jeff!
IC: *Opens his arms and they hug* Look Stalin you made the birthday boy cry�you evil WHORE!
S: *Gasps* I certainly am not one of those! *Whispers to Squirrel friend* What�s a whore?
SF: *Whispers back* It�s like a hooker, but worse!
S: *Gasps* I most deffinatly am not one of those! Now take it back!
IC: Say your sorries to Mitch, he is hurt on the insides from your not caring-ness. You�ve cut him deep down on his insides Stalin�he�s not going to heal unless you sorry! Then I will take back my words of hate.
S: *Turns to Squirrel Friend for support* What am I to do?
SF: Say sorry�you cold hearted man you!
S: *Turns back to everyone* I�m�I�m sorry Mitch, I didn�t mean for it to get so out of hand. One thing led to another and another thing led to another thing and oh it just wouldn�t stop�
KM: Thanks Stalin�that means the world to me!
S: I�m sure it does, it came from the heart also!
KM: YAY! *They shake hands in friendship*
IC: *Nods* That�s the way it�s done, and I take back what I said to you Stalin it was wrong and un nessacary. Lets be best friends till the end of time!
S: Sounds good to me ole friend�sounds good.
*They hug in male bonding-ness times of good*
SF: Well this was magical and all but what are we going to do now?
LJ: Well we could travel through time�
KM: NO!�I mean not yet, cause it�s my birthday and we haven�t had my birthday dinner!
S: Ah yes, well whatever would you like to have Mitch?
KM: Hm, Steak?
LJ: *Crazily* STEAK! *Runs around the room screaming* Steak! Oh I love steak!
KM: Or maybe Tacos�
LJ: *Stops dead in his tracks* What? No�steak? How could you not want steak? It�s the essence of life�the reason I live! Don�t take that away!
KM: *Ignoring him* Yeah lets have tacos!
*All cheer for the taco havings*
IC: I�ll go make these delicious taco�s. My mouth is watering just thinking of how yum tastic this is going to be.
KM: I know, they sound so good. Don�t forget the rice!
IC: Oh I am glad you reminded me I almost forgot. I am one crazy chef I tell ya. Forgetting the rice is like punching a puppy�
S: It�s wrong and immoral!
IC: *Puts on his chef hat and little suit* I KNOW!�Don�t I look spiffy all?
*All nod and he walks into the kitchen*
LJ: *Drops to his knees. Long and drawn out* Steak!
SF: *Strolls on over to Jimmy. Acts like he�s selling drugs* Hey you want some steak?
LJ: Yeah, you got some. I have this craving and it wont go away�I gotta have some, have some soon!
SF: Okay lean in close�*Jimmy leans in and he slaps him* Snap out of it man, it�s only steak!
LJ: *Screams of anger* Why do I always fall for you tricky tricks that you trick me with?
SF: I don�t know�is it cause your really not smart
LJ: That could be it�but it seems like it should be deeper
SF: No it doesn�t�
LJ: QUIET YOU! *Smacks him*
KM: *Rushes over and pushes Jimmy down* Don�t mess with me and squirrel friend. We stick together like GLUE!
LJ: Okay�I think I am going to go now�*Walks to the table awaiting his tacos*
SF: Good job Mitch! High Five! *They high five*
IC: *Walks in and sets the table with the dinner* Dinner is served!
KM: TACOS! *All rush to the table* Hey could you pass the hard shells?
S: Oh why certainly! *Passes the hard shells*
KM: Thank you very much!
S: Oh you are very welcome�
KM: Indeed I am! Oh could I have the rice and the meat too?
S: Oh why of course! *Passes the rice and meat*
KM: Thanks, your such a nice guy!
S: Not nearly as nice as you�
KM: Oh stop it!
SF: STOP THE NONSENSE! Lets just eat tacos in silence�okay?
KM: *Frightened* Okay�
S: Alright�*Sighs and eats his tacos and silence goes over the room*
IC: Uhm, could I have the meat?
SF: Oh of course *Passes the meat*
IC: Thanks
SF: *Nods* Mhm�
*After a long time of eating the are all stuffed*
LJ: *Patting his belly* Well that was delicious!
IC: Thanks, I did my best!
*All sit there stuff burping and getting ready for their time traveling*
KM: I think it�s time for a little time travel!
*All cheer*
LJ: Lets board the RV! *All scream with excitement*
*Everyone gets into some time traveling suits and boards the RV*
LJ: Oh wipe your feet as you get on, we don�t want dirt on the new RV do we?
*All shake their heads no*
KM: Okay guys lets go to the year 2006!
LJ: Wait! Are we all buckled in?
SF: All the stuff is to big for me!
LJ: Oh I have a little seat for you right here *Gives him the little seat*
SF: Gee thanks mister, THANKS A LOT!
*Jimmy chuckles and goes into the cockpit of the RV*
LJ: Okay are we now all buckled in? *Everyone says something to show they are* Okay now lets get a moving! *Starts up the RV and hit�s the time travel button* To the year 2006! *Types in the little destination thing* And we�re off! *Gets bumpy. Over the intercom* Were experiencing a little turbulance, please stay buckled and drinks will be served after we get through this. *BING* Okay now it�s safe to unbuckle and drinks will be served momentarily!
*The lady approaches with a drink tray in a flight attendant suit*
L: Would you like a drink or some peanuts?
S: I WOULD! *Hands him some peanuts*
L: Good choice sir!
S: Thanks *Smiles*
L: Any one else?
KM: We all just had a big taco diner we are kinda stuffed. So maybe later.
L: There wont be a later were almost to our destination�
KM: Oh well then that�s good!
L: It sure is, now I must go sit in my seat so we can land!
KM: Bye then, *Talking to Squirrel Friend* Well she was a nice lady!
SF: Indeed�
LJ: *Comes on over the intercom again* Okay people this is your captain speaking, if you could buckle up that would be nice we are about to land. *All buckle up* Drinks will no longer be served and it might be a bumpy landing so hold on to your goats. *Jeff grabs a goat and Jimmy sighs* Who brought a goat?
IC: I did! No one said I couldn�t!
LJ: Didn�t you read the sign when you got on?
IC: No *Mitch points to the sign. And Jeff is sad* No goats�ok it�s time to say goodbye goat�*He opens the window and throws him out*
KM: What are you doing? You can�t throw goats out of windows�
IC: I had no choice *Cries*
S: *Pats his back* It�s okay�maybe one day you will reunite!
IC: Maybe�*Hopes*
*They land in the year 2006 and everyone gets off the bus*
IC: *Gasps and runs over to find his goat* GOATY! I missed you�
G: Baaa!
*Everyone goes over and pets the goat and makes friends with the goat*
S: Who�s a cute little goat? Who�s a cute little goat!?
IC: *Blushes* I am�
S: I was talking to the goat�
G: Baaa!
IC: Oh fine! I can�t be a cute goat now?
SF: Hate to break it to you but your not a goat�
IC: Someday I will be! I�ll show you, show you all!
LJ: I bet you will�*Pulls out a map* Okay now to find Hitler and what not to seek our revenge of evil sorts�*Winks uncontrollably* Oh I�ve got something in my eye *Does a thumbs up to Mitch*
*Everyone turns to Mitch*
KM: What?
S: Why is he winking so much?
LJ: I have something in my eye!
IC: Sure you do�
LJ: It�s true I did, but then I got it out. Cause you know I have skills!
IC: *Nods* Sure you do!
KM: Moving on�Where is Hitler at?
LJ: You know I don�t know�I just like to pull out maps�they make me feel special!
SF: On the inside?
LJ: Of course!�Now lets just go search for him
*All cheerfully agree and go on a search for him*
*Cuts to Hitler and everyone else at Dubya and Babs house*
H: You know what I miss Mitch, and Stalin�
M: Yeah me to�wait Stalin? He tortured you and made you cry a lot�
H: Yeah but it was all the attention I got that was so special�
D: I miss Mitch too
B: Honey doodle we all do�
OBL: I don�t really�all of the torturings and evil ness he did wont ever heal on my insides�
SH: Same here�way to much evil
FC: Who wants a cigar!?
HB: No one here wants one! You think we want lung cancer?
FC: Well yeah, it�s cool to be dying inside�
HB: It is not!
OBL: Fidel, we need to talk�
SH: Courage the anti drug�
*Everyone bursts into laughter*
PC: Gobble!
HB: Oh Penelope is calling me! Come Fidel, Osama, and Saddam she needs us!
*All of them run upstairs*
H: Oh those guys�you know what this is fun. Staying here drinking coco deep into the nights. Eating waffles, and drinking waffle milk�it�s like a resort that I call home�
B: We are trying to make it the best for you cause we love you right down to every little freckle on your face�
H: I don�t have freckles�
B: Well some ones got to have them�
M: I don�t think anyone does�
B: Gosh darn it!
*Ding dong*
D: I�ll get it! *Runs over to the door and opens it*
S: Hi is Hitler here?
D: Yep, *Calling* Hitler some ones here for you!
H: *Comes running and then stops dead in his tracks* Uhm Dubya close the door we hate him!
D: Oh yeah�*Tries to close the door but Stalin busts through*
S: Now Hitler this is where I get my revenge on you for all the pain and suffering you�ve done to me. The others don�t matter now. It�s just me and you with people watching�
D: I�ll make popcorn! *Rushes off and comes in later with popcorn*
S: Okay can I start again? *Dubya Nods* Okay, you took back your groove, humiliated me, put me in a cage and left me, put me in a cage again and left me in the dreaded sandbox, threw egg at me and so much more! Now you�ll get yours *Goes in for the hurting of Hitler*
SF: *Squeaks of doom. Jumps on Stalin and hurts him bad* Take this, and that a little of this! And some of that!
KM: *Runs in about to hurt Jeff* Your going to be hurting!
IC: You know, I actually love Hitler!
KM: Me too! But it�s only a man crush�
IC: WHOA! Same here�
LJ: I don�t hate Hitler either!
S: What is wrong with all of you? Hitler is BAD�and wrong, a cancer to society!
H: No, that would be YOU! *Smacks him*
SF: *Cuffs him and puts him in a cage* Take that!
B: *Walks up* Aww your so cute Mr. Squirrel�may I pet you?
SF: Go right ahead!
G: *Walks in* Baaa!
B: Oh your cute too�so many cute little critters�I love you all! *Cries tears of happiness*
G: Baa!
D: Wow what a smart goat�
IC: His name is Goaty! *Smiles*
S: Are you all mad?
LJ: No, I�m happy!
S: No, I mean mad as insane�get it?
LJ: No�but who cares your dumb! *Turns away from him* What are you guys going to do with Stalin?
KM: Make him a Butler!
D: Hey that�s a good idea�I always wanted a butler�a nice evil butler.
LJ: But if he doesn�t listen to you then you can kill him!
B: Oh it sounds so grand!
*They go on talking and Mitch goes and finds Hitler to be friends again. He finds him turn the other way*
KM: Hitler, it�s me Mitch�I came all this way so I could talk to you one last time!
H: *Turns* MITCH! Oh my gosh I though I would never see you again, and all I wanted to do was see you one time�but now I can see you everyday!
KM: You mean�we can stay here with you FOREVER!?
H: Well, lets ask Dubya and Babs first!
IC: OKAY! *Jeff, Mitch, Mr. Squirrel, and Jimmy walk over to Babs and Dubya*
H: Hey guys can these guys board with us? It will be so very much fun! And then our new butler will clean their messes!
*Dubya and Babs conference*
D: Well okay!
S: HEY! I never said I was going to be your butler�*Dubya comes over and puts one of those ball chain things on his foot and stuff*
D: Well if you try to leave you will be shot!
S: Aw man�and all my evil minions left me for Hitler�he�s not even that great!
H: Shut up! I am great and you know it!
KM: Hey guys It�s my Birthday!
M: Oh my we should sing you a happy birthday song!
*They all sing happy birthday*
KM: Oh thanks guys�this means the world to me.
SF: Hey is that Penelope chicken here?
B: She sure is�why?
IC: He wants to hook up with her!
*Everyone laughs and just at that moment Fidel comes downstairs with Penelope*
PC: *Sees Mr. Squirrel* Oh�Go-bble!
SF: Oh�your looking mighty fine�*They run to each other and hug*
FC: This is kind of disturbing�
OBL: Yeah it is what are they doing�
SH: �Hugging� I think�it sure doesn�t look like hugging
IC: Lets all have a party!
*Everyone excitedly says yeah*
IC: I�ll cook some food!
H: I�ll set the table!
B: I�ll crunch some ice�or I�ll cube it, I don�t know whatever it takes!
D: I�ll get the cups for you!
OBL: And I�ll bring the Brownies!
KM: I�ll be in charge of the music�what should it be? Uhm Duran Duran I think! Yeah we all like them don�t we? *All nod*
SH: I�ll�be in charge of the outdoor lighting and water!
FC: I�ll bring the cigars for us all to smoke and die internally from!
HB: NO! I said they were bad�you don�t seem to understand that!
FC: I�m Cuban�I understand nothing!
HB: Aint that the truth! *Everyone laughs*
H: Chuck what will you be in charge of?
HB: I�ll set up a play pen for all of the animals! They will love all the space and gallop in freedom of love�or something odd like that.
M: I�ll make sure Stalin tries not to escape while catering the party�
KM: Then it�s settled!
S: I�m not catering a stupid party!
SF: *Smacks him* Your going to cater it and your going to like it!
S: I�m not going to like it *Gets smacked again*
SF: YES! You will like it! Understood?
S: Yes sir�
*So then they all go to work on this party and then they get it together and we hear Duran Duran in the back round and people talking*
S: *Walking up to everyone* Would you like a drink of some ordure�s to go with�whatever you seem to be eating?
KM: No thanks but you can call me MISTER great Mitch�now say it again
S: *Sighs* Mister great Mitch would you like a drink or and ordure?
KM: No thanks now run along�
*Rio comes on and everyone runs to the center of the yard and does a big mosh pit type thing and gets crazy*
H: This is so fun! We should do it more often!
M: I know why ever didn�t we think of this before?
H: I don�t know�
*Over in the play pen for the animals*
SF: So Penelope what is your favorite movie?
PC: Gobble�
SF: *Gasps* Mine too�I love it when they do that thing! *Starts to laugh*
PC: *Laughs along*
G: Baaa�
SF: It is nice weather�a little too nice.
PC: Gobble�
SF: Yeah your right I should de-tense-afy
G: BAAA!
SF: I know I know�I�m trying just let me cool down on my own!
*Cuts back to Everyone having fun*
IC: *Manding the grill* Come and get your food!
SH: And then come and get your water and outdoor lights!
B: And your ICE!
*All rush over and get their food and the scene ends with them partying it up*
And Scene