Scene: Italian Restaurant
Characters: Saddam Hippie Squirrel (SHS), Osama Hippie Squirrel (OHS), Hitler (H), Dubya (D), The Waiter (W), and Mussolini (M)
*In the Italian Restaurant and the gang chats it up*
SHS: Well I really think we should get more food and live up to our names now don�t-cha think Osama?
OHS: I really do think so Saddam! But you know we can�t go into an Italian restaurant and not buy some spaghetti.
SHS: Very true. Ok, let�s go for some more food, and order our favorites this time!
*All cheer*
H: But Osama I still love you with the heat and passion of 1000 burning suns!
OHS: Yeah�umm I thought we just went over this, I don�t love you.
H: *Sobs* I can�t accept this! I�m going down the to flower shop and I�m going to buy you flowers and then maybe some candy.
D: Alright, alright Hitler, go get your flowers. And the rest of us will go and watch Osama and Saddam get full of spaghetti.
*Hitler walks away to a flower shop�conveniently located right next to the Italian restaurant*
SHS: Garcon! I need some�.
OHS: *Interrupts* Why did you say garcon? Just call over the waiter.
SHS: But I like to say garcon it makes me feel all fancy.
OHS: You�re not fancy! You�re a friggen squirrel!
SHS: *Tears up* Why must you remind me! Jeez! Why don�t I just move to Portugal with all the rest of the freaks! They even have a pamphlet it gives you all the freak activities. *Gets out pamphlet* See freak arts, freak concerts, even freak movie hour. With freaky popcorn!
OHS: I didn�t mean it that way. Why in the world would I send you to sucky ole Portugal? I mean I�m not the devil. I�m sorry lets just forget it and call over the wai-um I mean *Does the quotation marks with his fingers* �Garcon� and lets order our booze and sketti uh I mean spaghetti.
SHS: Alright then, *Shouts with glee* GARCON! Get your butt over here before I curse you to Portugal!
*Waiter gets a frightened look on his face and he drops all that he was doing to get to the table*
W: DON�T CURSE ME TO PORTUGAL! I have a house a dog and we just remodeled my bathroom. Want to see pictures?
D: Yeah I do! *The waiter shows him the pictures* Wow that�s a nice bathroom.
W: Yeah it is�so please not the Portugal!
SHS: Alright, alright I will spare you!
W: What will you have? We have a special going two bottles of beer and two plates of spaghetti for only-
SHS: *Interrupts* Ah ah ah remember the Portugal!?
W: *Scared to death* Yes, yes I remember! Oh did I say only� I meant it�s FREE! Just not the Portugal!
SHS: That�s a little more like it!
D: Umm wow this was a tinsey bit odd. But hey I�m having lunch with two Hippie Squirrels and Mussolini. Oh what next!
*Hitler Comes running in out of breath with a lovely bouquet of flowers for Osama*
H: I�ve *Gasps for breath* got your flowers! *Gasps once again* And might I add I�ve got chocolates and I�I�I just want you back! Accept these and lets get it on! *Smiles all �Lets get it on-ish�*
OHS *Slightly disgusted about getting it on with Hitler. He accepts the flowers and chocolates* Well I still don�t love you. I just like chocolate and flowers *Sniffs the flowery scent* Mmm. So�umm�stop loving me!
H: *Slightly saddened but still determined* No I will never give up on you! You are my sunshine! My only sunshine!
D: Ok lets do what we came here to do. Hitler lets get Mussolini to help get your groove back!
H: Oh right I�m going to need my groove if me and Osama want to�.well I think you all know. *WINKS. All cringe* Hey how did you know I needed my groove back?
D: *Shouts randomly* I�m DRUNK! *Falls over* Whoops a daisy�
H: Hey Dubya.
D: Hey *Y drags on*
H: How did you know about that? I never told you.
D: Didn�t I just tell you I was drunk!
H: No�did you?
D: Was I supposed to?
H: *Shrugs*
D: Well�Mussolini informed us while Saddam and Osama yelled at the waiter.
M: Yeah lets stop this madness and get to talking more about me!
H: *Chuckles* Yes lets talk about me getting my groove so I can-
D: *Interrupts* STOP RIGHT THERE BUCK-O!
H: Alright, you don�t got to tell me more than two or three times. Any-hoo I really need your help here Mussolini!
SHS: I�m going to need your help also. I don�t want to be a Drunken Hippie Squirrel forever and be banded to Portugal. *In a gossipy voice to Osama* I hear that they eat squirrels like us for breakfast there.
OHS: *Gasps* NO! You�re kidding! We are defiantly going to need your help Mussolini!
M: Yes I see you all need me.. All of you except Dubya.
D: Oh I need you to help me back to my time. *Slight pause* After we get Hitler�s groove of course!
M: Oh of COURSE! And I�m glad I�m so needed! Well we will need a plan to get Stalin!
H: Oh certainly! Cause he has my groove!
M: Right!
OHS: *Angry* Where the heck is our food! Saddam ordered it over 5 minutes ago!
W: Oh here is your food�Sorry for the long wait *Pauses and takes a deep satisfying breath* I got my sleeve stuck on a nail and it was horrible. No one would help me I cried and cried for help, but sadly I run this restaurant by myself�so I had to work it out on my own.
SHS: Yes, yes how traumatic that must have been�I want my food, NOW!
W: Here it is. JUST NOT THE PORTUGAL!
SHS: Alright! Now be gone!
W: Ok bye. Enjoy your meals!
OHS: We will! Woo! Spaghetti!
M: *Frantically sniffs the air for that magical scent of spaghetti* Is that SPAGHETTI!? Oh it�s been over 15 minutes since my last batch. Spaghetti is my nicotine you know.
OHS: Here have mine. After all you are helping me with this squirrel thing.
M: Yes, pass the cheese stuff!
D: The parmesan?
M: Who the heck cares what it�s called! I just want the cheese. NOW PASS!
D: *Frightened* Ok ok. Boy I�ve never seen this side of him�it scares me.
H: I kind-a like it. *Gets that look in his eye*
D: *Slaps him* NO! stop falling in love with you friends!
H: Fine!
M: Well we ought to plan this getting Hitler�s groove back soon. But lets call it a night and go home to our pets� But sadly I have no pets�*Thinks* Wait! I could say the phone is my pet�yes good job me!
D: Yea um can I stay with you tonight Mussolini?
M: Yeah all of you can accept Hitler cause he has his own �pad�.
OHS: Alright! Sleep over at Mussolini�s! I call shot gun on the couch!
D: Oh darn I wanted the couch�*Is sad*
SHS: Me too!
M: You guys can sleep on the floor. Ok?
D and SHS: *Mumble together* Fine�
M: I can�t hear you!
D and SHS: *Agitated* Fine!
*Hitler feels left out and decides to go home and look at pictures of him and Eva back in the good ole days*
*Dubya, Saddam, Osama, Mussolini all go together laughing and having a blast*
OHS: This is going to be the best night ever!
*Hitler is very sad*
OHS: Best-est EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER!
*Hitler is even sadder and walks alone to his cold home*
And Scene