Cell Phones: how they really got popular.
Cell Phones: how they really got popular.
Thus, we enter Spandex Country.
Upon searching through many newsgroups on the Net, I've found mixed reactions concerning the Sci-Fi Channel's new schedule. Instead of airing overhyped, made in the last FIVE year tripe that couldn't cut it in syndication, cheap-ass half-assed science fiction shows during prime-time, the Sci-Fi Channel has taken a look at their past and decided to air episodes of the original Batman. You know, the one where Adam West and Burt Ward defy logic, sanity, color schemes, and various supposed homosexual overtones while beating the hell out of costumed henchmen to the tunes of WAP!, ZOINKS!, AND POW!!
God, I loved typing that.
Some love it, since it's not a watered-down piece of shit, kissing cousin to 'The Next Generation.' Some hate it, citing that it's not really Sci-Fi. I'm one of the former, for good reason: the Sci-Fi Channel is in a rut. It has been ever since it took off all the older programming in favor of new shows that haven't even been around for five years, much less have a decent following. Dark Skies? The Visitor? Earth: Final Conflict? PLEASE! There was a reason people didn't watch these in the first place. Plus, to actually be successful in reruns, a show has to disappear for a while. Vanish, let nostalgia take over the logic of your mind and want it back. Personally, I wouldn't be sad if the seven episodes of 'Visitor' were burned. They sucked.
Especially when they're played on a daily basis. How the hell can someone do that? That makes no sense. Even on a weekly basis, it doesn't ring true.
Anyway, back to the subject. The reason Sci-Fi was able to keep
up this charade for a long time was because it's parent company, USA Networks,
had a big ace in the hole: Wrestling. They could throw any
shit at the screen and not really care if it slid or stank because they
didn't really care. Hell, as long as somebody is watching (old fans
be damned), it doesn't matter. That is, until wrestling went away
and USA realized that when you have 12 ounces of shit and 6 ounces of gold,
it's still shit.
Hence, we have some nostalgia back on Sci-Fi. Hopefully, it won't be the end. The first step in the right direction begins with "Batman."
"Batman" itself was quite like any other fad: for two years in the '60s (1966 & 67), it was the hottest thing on TV. Hell, the show aired two new episodes per week, often cliffhangers to keep everyone watching. And, despite all the hindsight about it now, it was nearly damn perfect, ratings-wise. You had action and adventure to keep the blood racing for the men of the house. You had colorful costumes and evildoers punished for the right-thinking kids. You had a good lesson, which I guess kept the Moms happy. And other shit that only the executives of the Land of Television could explain with a straight face. But, alas, we forget the objective word: FAD. By 1968, "Batman" had faded. It's time was over, and it was time to fade. Thus, we begin with the third and last season.
The days of the old two-part episodes were over. Nearly all the stories of this season were self-contained or multi-parters with odd and silly villains like Marmaduke Pfogg and Lady Penelope Peasoup, who in today's Batman world would surely get their asses kicked by old ladies and stupid villains like Film Freak. Then, sadly, the show limped to it's eventual downfall and now lives safely in reruns as a product of it's time. However, our experiment today is the very first episode of Season Three, and an example of "The Poochie Syndrome."
Well, if Poochie looked good in purple spandex.
When a show is failing, one of the oldest, tried and true ways to boost interest is to introduce a new character to add a new dynamic to the show. Unfortunately, there has never really been a good example of this working. In fact, in sitcoms it's often one of the first signs of a death of the show, a sign of lazy writers or too much network interference. But, in this case, it could almost be mistaken as such. But, believe it or not, 'Batman's' Poochie was none other than poor, innocent Batgirl. Yup, Batgirl. The one who looks good in purple spandex. Sadly, she's been a supporting character in Batman comics for nearly eons now, at least going back to the 1960s if not further. Hardly the type of character to be invented on a sly just to boost ratings. Sigh. Oh, well.
The episode begins with Commissioner Gordon's daughter Barbara coming home from college. Immediately, the Commissioner fixes her up with millionaire bachelor Bruce Wayne. But, before Barbara can meet her date, she's abducted by the Penguin who plans to marry her against HER WILL!!
*cue dramatic music*
Because, you see, if the Penguin marries the Commissioner's daughter, he'll be immune to all legal litigation because...well.....I'm not sure. But he WILL!! So, it's Batman off to the rescue!! Along with Robin, if he can get his short pants out of the dryer in time. So follows the basic Batman plotline: Batman eventually finds the Penguin's hideout and beats him and his henchmen up. However, the change is that Barbara is really BATGIRL!! And she has a BATCYCLE!! How? Why?
Well, they don't say. Perhaps she's bored.
Anyway, Batgirl's secret identity is found out by Alfred, who swears never to tell it, not even to his employers. Hence, the change of the dynamic. And such. So, Batman and Robin find themselves in a new situation about a new crimefighter while Alfred continues his role with the extra benefit of double crossing a double cross. All really confusing, really.
But, it's self-contained, which helps the story really move along. Good enough for me.
RATING: Well, Yvonne Craig, Burgess Meredith, and Adam West are fine actors and it shows. The rest? They pass the test. Either way, you're not watching it for the drama, you're watching for the action. And you get it. While I miss the typical cliffhanger ending, the revised third season cliffhangers (less dramatic; they only show the criminal in the next episode) settle the urge. It's good stuff, it's an half hour, you know what you're getting into. ZAP!! POW!! CONGEAL!! Three ZAPS out of Four. Oh, yeah, enjoy the colors.
[MILHOUSE] "B-B-but my mom says' I'm cool!!"[/MILHOUSE]